Nose Milk
by Sharmander
Summary: Roxas Anderson is the head of the school while Axel Martinez is a huge freak with a troubled past. If that's the case then how come Roxas is telling Axel to be his boyfriend? Something isn't right, and it's not just the milk dripping out of Axel's nose.
1. Roxas Anderson

**Chapter One: Roxas Anderson**

I pause my music when I feel Demyx tugging on my hoodie's sleeve. I turn slowly and send him an annoyed look, frowning around the straw in my mouth I quickly turn away when he doesn't say anything. I have to do a double take though because his face is actually _serious_. I turn fully towards him and pull my hood down, but he's not staring at me, here's where I notice he's looking _right _past me.

I look over to Zexion about to ask what the hell is wrong with Demyx. To my astonishment he isn't reading but looking in the same direction, his one visible eye slightly wider than normal and even my small, blonde friend Naminé is looking up from her sketch pad, though her sad features are hard to read. Now, my friends are all actually quite weird but this is even freaky for them. I wave my gloved hand in front of Demyx's face and he lifts his chin using it to point at something behind me.

Now I'm scared, because I hate when there's something behind me, mostly because I can't see it and well if it's behind me it probably snuck up and is going to assassinate me. I turn slowly, sucking on the straw that I stabbed into my Nesquik milk box.

Have you ever spewed milk out of your nose? If you have then you know how uncomfortable it is. Demyx squeals and scurries away from me and my nose milk that's now all over the lunch table. Naminé shifts further taking her sketch pad with her and Zexion just makes a _'tsk'_ sound in the back of his throat. But anyways, if you're wondering why milk is flying out of my nose I won't keep you in the dark about it.

Roxas fucking Anderson is standing right beside my freaking lunch table. I blink furiously and stare up at the blonde haired dude that rules the school, and who I've had the _secretest of crushes_ on since grade nine (but I'm like the zillionth person to like him). Now is when I notice the complete silence of the usually bustling, and horribly loud cafeteria. I'm also just becoming aware of all the eyes on me, watching me and waiting to see why Roxas is standing here.

You probably don't understand why everyone is acting like the apocalypse has just arrived, well let me clear something up for you. The hierarchy of my high school goes as follows:

Roxas and his friends at the very top, my sister Kairi, included. They rule everything the teachers don't see. They are the group of teenagers people in this school would sell their soul and their baby sister's souls, just to sit near them at lunch.

Then there's Seifer Almasy with his goons, and let me tell you how badly I want to punch him in the face. He's taken it upon himself to make sure our school is _loser/freak_ free. This in turn means I usually get into a fight 5 to 6 times a week.

After those idiots, there are miscellaneous students. These are the ones not everyone knows but you know that they're pretty normal, the ones that eat the gossip right up. Kind of like the people who read the tabloids, you know average folks who like to know what's going on in some celebrity's life. They take up at least 70 % of the school's population and really, they aren't much.

Then there is the staff of the school. The principle and the teachers, you know the ones that make sure all us crazy kids don't kill each other or uhm…burn down the building. Not like I've tried, don't give me that look!

Anyways, I bet you're wondering where my group and myself fall into this mass hierarchy. Well we are at the _very_ bottom, under the teachers and annoying social workers that I'm sure no one likes. At least I know I can't stand them.

My group is considered like, the scum of the earth. We're probably the gum stuck under the high school's hypothetical shoe. It's just Demyx, Zexion, Naminé and me. If anyone is talking about us, I assure you they're all bad things.

Now you see why everyone is so amazed that_ The_ Roxas Anderson is standing right by _me_, Axel Martinez, leader of the freak show?

Talking to me or anyone I associate with is like social suicide, you loose whatever rank you have in the high school food chain and fall right along side us. The only way people say anything to us is if they are picking a fight or trying to harm our self-esteems. Little fuckers don't know I could care less. The only reason I get into fights is to defend my friends.

Anyways, back to me spewing milk out of my nose because of Roxas. I stare up at him, hiding my dripping nose in my black sleeve and just watch him. He's perfection in every way, shape or form. He's got the perfect blonde hair, with those big, baby blue eyes that make more then half of the teenagers in my school wet themselves (and I don't mean tinkle) and completely flawless skin. He's a little (a lot) on the short side, but don't let that fool you. He's the school's star quarter back and has been since freshmen year and on top of that he's leader of the track team.

So, I'm wondering right about now why exactly he's standing there staring at me, looking a little disgusted. Well, part of that could be the milk on the table but that doesn't explain why he's here. I'm Axel Martinez, the weirdo that transferred in half way through freshmen year because I got expelled for setting my last principle's car on fire, I'm the guy people avoid in the hallways because I'm supposedly some crazy-ass meth dealer who's on edge all the time (that is such a horrible rumor, I've never even tried meth!), I'm also the biggest faggot in the school and I'm probably the biggest outcast of them all. So why is he _here_?

"Martinez, right?" he says and his voice is comparable to angel farts or something else nice and soft, though he has this stern 'I-don't-give-a-fuck' undertone to it.

"I be him," I say and sniffle a bit, ew I can smell the chocolate milk in my nose.

Here he puts his hands flat on the table, bringing his face really close to mine and I kind of lean my head back looking like a scared animal. Then his tiny hand shoots up and wraps around my hood's edge and tugs me right back so that we're practically breathing the same air again. I know at least 4 dozen girls that would kill to be in the position I'm in right now.

Then he kisses me. Right in front of everyone and my eyes are so big, I think I look like a Tariser monkey. His lips are so soft and he kind of smells like chocolate, or that could be the milk residue in my nose…no it's definitely him. I can feel my heart pounding in my throat because, I won't lie, I've fantasized about this way too much and the real deal is a million times better.

"You're my boyfriend now," he says pulling away and casting a look over his shoulder, I don't notice who he's looking at because I'm still sitting in the same position he left me in. I fight the blush off my cheeks and blink crazily.

"Wait, what?" I ask after I recover from the initial shock and straighten up, realizing he just told me I was his boyfriend. Yeah, you see the problem with that sentence? He _told _me, he didn't _ask_ me. I probably wouldn't have been so angry if he would have asked nicely, I don't like being told what to do.

"You heard me Martinez, I'll see you after school," he says and goes to turn away; I grip his wrist and stop him. Damn, thank god I have long arms.

"You can't just come here and…like…do that!" I say flailing my free arm around and he looks at me like I'm stupid.

"Yes I can, I'm Roxas Anderson. I can do whatever the fuck I want," and he's got the cockiest smirk I've ever seen, and I realize that it's even cockier then mine.

"But…what if I don't want to?" I say defiantly and he raises a perfect, blonde eyebrow at me.

"You like being all the way down here? Always stuck at the lunch table by the garbage? Always having Siefer beat up your little…_posse_?" and he says this like he knows the answer, but fuck I don't want to say yes and look like a desperate fuck. I probably would have been all over him under different circumstances.

Plus, I've handled it all since freshmen year, I can tough it out a little longer…but then I look back and see _them_. My pathetic-can't-fight-for-themselves friends and I feel my heart tear in two. I can tough it out, but they've been struggling since day one. Demyx barley wants to come to school.

"Fine…whatever," I hear myself grumble and he smirks.

"Thought so. I'll drive you home after school, be out in the parking lot at 2:35," and now he tugs his wrist free, but it's not like I was even holding him forcefully anymore and walks away.

I'm still waiting for the pig's blood, you know. Even as I turn back around and stare at everyone at my table that's looking at me like I've grown a second head.

"So…you're dating Roxas Anderson?" Demyx says slowly, and Zexion doesn't go back to reading which means I have to answer.

"Uhm…yeah, I guess I am," I say and blink owlishly as the cafeteria erupts into noise again. People screaming out gossip or texting away to all those who stayed home today and missed the show. I hear my name being shouted more then usual.

"How does it feel?" Demyx asks and I stare at him like he's the stupidest thing on the planet.

"Exactly like it did when I was single, only now I feel like a tramp," I grumble and cross my arms over my chest. Naminé is looking at me thoughtfully and finally decides to say something.

"I don't trust this," she says quietly and I look at her, tilting my head to the side and smiling softly at her.

"How come Nami?" I ask and she looks towards Roxas' table, then back at me.

"I'm not sure; I just don't have a good feeling about it," I scoff as she looks at me worriedly; I roll my eyes and take my iPod back out.

"I'm a big boy, I can handle myself Nami," I say and drown out all the noise as I hit play again, the sounds of The Electric Six filling my head pushing everything else out.

What a fucked up lunch.

**~*~**

I run out of my last period, and I mean run. I can tolerate school as much as the next guy but man, I cannot wait to get home.

I'm at my locker now, tugging on my jacket and wrapping my scarf around my neck. I used to hate winter accessories when I was younger, but since Nami knit this scarf for me I find myself wearing it even when it's not cold. It's really long and made of soft, thick, red yarn. I love the way it feels on my skin and I nuzzle my face into it. I hear people laughing at me but I don't care. I do probably look crazy, shoving my face into my scarf.

"Hey Ax, ready to head out?" Demyx says walking up beside me, he's always lugging around his heavy-as-hell guitar case. I look at him nodding my head and smile as we walk out of the school. Then it hits me and I stop, eyes going wide.

"Shit! I'm supposed to meet Roxas behind the school," I say and Demyx looks terrified.

"Well, go!" he says and looks at me, probably wondering why I'm still standing in the same spot. I bite my bottom lip and think.

Why should I even listen to that jerk? I don't have to obey his every whim, and I'm sure as hell not going to run after him if he decides to drive away and leave me standing there in the parking lot like a complete reject.

"No way, I rather walk with you," I say and throw my arm over his shoulder as we continue on our way to our houses.

"I don't know man, what if he like…beats you up!" he says worriedly and I frown at him.

"Demyx, why would my…_boyfriend_…beat me up?" I ask and raise my eyebrow, he says nothing and I sigh.

"Look, quit worrying about it! At least tomorrow we won't have to sit by the garbage!" I say and smile brightly down at the normally-spunky blonde. He smiles a bit at that, I know he's always hated sitting there.

"Maybe we can sit by the windows," he says and I smile, nuzzling my nose into his cheek.

"That's more like it!" I say and he laughs, shaking his head.

"You're a dumbass you know,"

"How?" I look at him and just as he's about to say something, the roar of an engine cuts off all conversation.

A black SUV also decides to drive right up on the sidewalk and cut us off completely. Demyx flies back, terrified because he probably thinks it's the FBI and they're here to take him in and question him. I stay rooted to the floor and I will never, ever admit to being even a fraction of an inch, scared.

The driver's door opens and a small head of blonde hair bounces out of the black SUV.

'_For fuck sakes,'_ is all I can think to mumble under my breath as Roxas walks around and leans on his hip in front of me.

"It's 2:45 you know," he says, watching me with those stupid eyes. I wish he was ugly, like really ugly so that I could look at him without my stomach tying up in knots.

"Oh, no I didn't but thanks for telling me," I say and go to grab Demyx. I tug his jacket sleeve and start trudging through the snow to get around the huge fucking beast of a car. Roxas watches me struggle and I turn to glare at him, after realizing there's no way I can get around the car because its fender is pushed right up against a fence.

"Can you move your car?" I hiss and he raises an eyebrow at me, tilting his head to the side as if I hadn't asked him in plain old English.

"I said I was driving you home, why are you going to walk?" he asks and I glare at him

"Because I'm capable of walking, thank you very much and I need to take Demmy here home," I say and start heading to the back of the car so I can go around that way. I feel Roxas grip my sleeve and tug, hard. I stumble and pull Demyx back too.

"Ah, Ax what the fuck!" Demyx squeaks and Roxas is just standing there, with an iron grip on my jacket.

"I'll drive you both home," he says, a smirk on his face when Demyx visibly brightens.

"Oh fuck man, that would be awesome!" the lazy ass traitor says, already climbing into the back seat. I glare acid, daggers, poisonous darts and everything else at the back of my best friends head.

"Well, come on then…_babe_," Roxas says and I turn my glare to him, going to climb in right after Demyx but a harsh tug on my belt has be stumbling back out. I turn to look at the stupid blonde who's holding onto my belt which is dangerously close to my ass.

"What? Aren't you going to give me a ride too _babe_?" I growl and he throws his head back laughing, then pins me against the SUV. I really hate how he can just fucking man handle me.

"You'll sit up front with me," he says and his body is almost pressed up completely against mine, to the point where _everything_ is almost touching.

I swallow thickly and stare down at him as he casts another look over his shoulder and let's go of me. He heads around the back and climbs into the driver's side. I try and spot whatever he was looking at but I don't see anything. I grudgingly climb into the passenger seat and let the little shit drive me home.

I'm doing this for my friends; really…this has nothing to do with having a small crush on Roxas since the first year. Nothing to do with that at all.

Fuck, I can't even convince myself.

* * *

**A/N:** Ta-da xD  
What's better then an Akuroku fanfic? An akuroku fanfic in Axel's perspective!

Thanks for reading and review if you'd like.


	2. Monster Hickey

****

Chapter Two: Monster Hickey

Sitting at a clean, fresh smelling lunch table is an indescribable feeling. Maybe you're thinking '_It's no big deal…_' but listen, try sitting by the freaking garbage bin since freshman year. You'd appreciate the novelty that is a clean table by the window too. Demyx is humming happily as he eats his sandwich, that's stuffed with god knows what minus lunch meat. He's all vegetarian-save-the-world. I don't really understand, I gave up on the world.

But that might be because I'm just a sour puss.

Naminé looks a little frightened, sitting here out in the open and she clutches her sketchpad tightly against her chest, eyes wide while she looks around. The table we used to sit by had a pillar beside it which she used to hide behind, now she's in clear view of everyone. I feel kind of bad for her, but at least she has a view of outside so that in the summer and autumn months she'll be able to sketch out some really nice scenery.

I pull out my chocolate milk and stab my straw into it angrily, I don't know why I'm in such a bad mood…actually I do.

**Rewind to this morning in P.E:**

I'm walking around the track, because that's what the coach makes me do. He says he doesn't want girls on his field or something like that. I shrug it off because as long as I'm passing and getting the stupid fucking credit I don't care. I should have done P.E in grade nine because now I'm stuck with all these meat-head jocks who really want to hurt me. At least in grade nine they didn't hate me as much, or anything. I mean by the end of the semester they'd hate me, but the beginning would have been easy.

I hate hearing the jeers every time I walk by them. It's so annoying and they are so loud I can hear them over my music. I throw my head back and groan, really loud. The coach looks at me and I stare right back.

"Is there a problem Martinez?" he asks and I only know this because I'm pretty decent at reading lips, and he's also shouting over my music. I pull my ear buds out and glare at him.

What is it with sporting types and only using people's last names? I mean, my name isn't Martinez it's fucking Axel. A-x-e-l, four letters two syllables, it's not that hard to remember. Even a gold fish could commit it to memory.

"My name's not Martinez," I shout back and the coach looks at me like I'm some disgusting scum and he wants to punch me square in the face.

"Oh, would you care to tell me what it is?" he asks, and I know they all want me to repeat what I said all those years ago in grade nine, the whole 'got it memorized?' thing but really, I'm not going to stoop to their level and actually say it. It's not like it would make me cool or something.

"It's fucking _Axel, _A-X-E-L! How many mother fucking times do I have to tell you? Or can't you read the attendance list!" I yell and his eyes bug out of his head, he's stomping over to me and I don't shrink back. This fucker is asking for it!

"Repeat yourself…Martinez," He hisses and I glare right back at him, my hands forming tight fists at my sides.

I stay silent and his face is slowly turning red, it reminds me of the mercury rising inside of a thermometer or something like that. It's slowly turning a deep cherry colour, even brighter then my hair. I hope he drops dead from an aneurysm right here, in front of me so I can kick him right in the freaking head.

"That's it!" he screams and points at the track angrily, I look down at it and raise an eyebrow, just to tick him off even more I cock my hip out and put my hand on it.

"Hey Coach," and the voice that interrupts the coach is none other then Roxas fucking Anderson. Oh for fuck sakes. I didn't even know he was in my class…Okay, that's a tiny lie. I find it hard to ignore him in the change rooms cause mmm damn!

He walks over to us and it would appear as if he wasn't just playing tackle football aside from the bruise slowly forming on his shin. The coach has him on some freaky pedestal, claiming he was going to take the sporting world by storm with his amazing-ness or whatever gay shit the coach said. Then he had the nerve to insult my masculinity? It's okay to be sensitive about sports and shit but nothing else? Ridiculous.

"I can teach Martinez here a few things if you want, you got the rest of those goons to teach," Roxas says with a shrug of his shoulders as if he's some nonchalant genius. The coach looks about ready to drop to his knees and suck him off right then and there.

I scowl as the coach thanks Roxas, shooting me a glare and leaving to go and take care of those 'goons'. I prefer the term gorillas, or savages, or Neanderthals though. Being a goon involves some mental capacity.

"Well come on," Roxas says and grabs my wrist roughly, tugging me into the weight lifting room. I scramble behind him and when the door closes he slams me against it hard enough to knock the breath right out of my lungs.

"Ugh w-what the f-fuck!" I hiss my chest heaving as he grips my shirt collar and pulls me down, crashing his lips against mine and he's fucking rough.

He bites my bottom lip when I don't respond and I gasp as a reflex, I swear! His tongue takes this as a fucking free-for-all because I can feel the muscle pushing and sliding against mine. As much as I want to resist, I can't and I find myself kissing him back, fighting his tongue and trying to get it the fuck out of my mouth and back into his. I succeed and soon my tongue tastes every inch of his mouth and he's panting heavily out of his nose, but he isn't pulling away and he's kept his harsh grip on me the entire time. I try to wiggle out of his grip but it's just as solid as it was when he first grabbed me. I open one eye and look down at his arms, I can see the skin pulling tight over the muscle and he's holding he fucking tight. I groan into his mouth and he smirks. He wasn't going to get tired anytime soon.

"You're so fucking weak," he says a little breathless and I stare down at him, left brow raised high on my forehead. I see a flicker of disgust in his eyes but soon enough it's gone.

"Want me to demonstrate?" he says and I don't do anything, I just stare. I find myself flying through the air and hitting the floor with a harsh thump, again struggling to breathe as the air is knocked clean out of my lungs. I gasp on the floor like a fish, my back aching with the impact and the bastard looks smug.

"How much do you weigh anyways? 100 pounds tops," he says and crosses his arms over his chest, looking at me just like everyone else. I sit up, my breath coming back but I'm still gasping and I clutch my chest.

"How…how…does that…show I'm weak?" I pant and he smirks and walks over to me, pushing me onto my back with his foot and keeping it on my chest with a crushing force.

I try and fight the whimper of pain that's itching to escape and I grip his ankle, ripping it away from my body and tugging. He falls to the floor but he's on top of me in ten seconds flat, gripping my thin wrists and slamming my hands over my head. He's not even sweating and I'm panting, already a little worn out from struggling.

"Take me off you," he whispers in my ear, his hot breath fanning over me and I try to stop the butterflies that are going berserk in my stomach at the seductive tone in his voice. I snap my head away, turning it as far as being human will allow but that only seems to amuse him and he chuckles.

I feel a hot tongue slide along my pulse and I tense, his lips following the trail his tongue left and his teeth are grazing the skin lightly.

"_Mmmph_," I breathe and push up against his hold but my wrists don't even budge.

He bites down right in the muddle of my neck and sucks_, hard_. I arch off the floor and a soft moan escapes my lips, making me turn a bright red because for fuck sakes, I did not just moan for him like a little bitch.

He keeps sucking harshly on the same spot, pulling the skin into his mouth through his teeth and it stings, but the pain shoots a jolt right to my crotch and I'm wiggling uncomfortably. He pulls away and licks the, no doubt, killer hickey he left on my fucking neck. He smirks against my moist skin as I struggle harder. I roll my hips up and he hisses, his fingers digging into my skin and that fucking whimper slips past my lips. It fucking _hurt_, okay!

"You don't want to walk out of here with a boner, do you Martinez?" He breathes into my ear and I shiver as he blows cool air at the hickey. I tug harder against his hold, and I'm grunting like an old man trying to take a shit.

"Get the hell off me, you're a horrible boyfriend," I hiss through clenched teeth, he's nipping along my jaw line and back down my neck, trailing soft kisses that _almost_ make me melt.

"This doesn't seem to think so," he whispers, moving my wrists so that he's holding them both above my head with one hand. I swallow thickly because his free hand is now wandering down my heaving chest, over my belly button, and it's still fucking going.

My chest starts heaving even more, and I try and move my hips away but his hand is already moving over the top of the fucking starting-tent in my shorts.

"That means nothing…" I spit and he looks at me with icy eyes and a cocky smirk.

"Whatever you say, _Axel_," and the way he purrs my name is enough to make me jizz in my fucking pants. I clench my eyes shut tight and he pokes the hickey one more time before getting off me in one smooth movement. I rise and hold myself up with my elbows shakily and he walks away chuckling.

"I want to see that, and everyone else has to see it too," he says and walks out of the exercise room while I'm left sitting there thinking of the coach giving me a lap dance in a crotch less leotard.

**Back to the lunch room, and the present:**

I take an angry sip from my milk and glare daggers at the laughing head of Roxas. A few of his friends look at me and smirk, something not quite right with the way they look at me. It makes my skin crawl slightly, and my heart falls right into my stomach acid when I see some of them getting up. One whispers something into Roxas' ear and the boy looks over at me; he smirks cruelly and nods his head. I take a longer swallow of my chocolate milk. The tips of my fingers itching in anticipation of a fight, even if the jocks will murder me, I don't care.

"Axel…those guys are coming over here," Demyx says softly and I try to shrug but my body is close to convulsing. I don't know why I'm so worked up about it.

The one that whispered something in Roxas' ear comes and stands right at end of the table to my left, I keep my hood on which gives me a good excuse. I mean, this thing completely blocks out my peripheral vision so it's not my fault. Again, the cafeteria goes completely silent and the boy grips my hood tugging it off my head harshly.

"Hey!" Demyx shouts and I shoot up out of my seat, looking like I want to kill him and he seems to believe it for a second before a smirk slides onto his face.

"Nice one Roxas! I'll bet it wasn't too hard though!" he calls and I blink a few times, then my hickey seems to start burning. My eye decides to develop a twitch and the sound of my fist cracking against his jaw bounces off the walls of the quiet cafeteria. A few girls gasp and some boys hoot, ready for a fight.

I straddle his lap and grip his shirt, a ferial growl ripping through my throat because, who the fuck is he to call me easy or not?

"Why the anger Martinez? Did that one sting?" he drawls and soon I find myself on my back with him on top of me.

He cocks his fist back and smiles brightly as he brings it down onto my face, I taste the blood as it starts to pool in my mouth and slides down my throat. I wonder how long it would take to drown in it. My head hit the floor pretty hard and stars with black little splotches appear behind my vision, I open my eyes after having clenched them shut and I see Roxas there tugging the silver haired bastard off of me.

"Riku, why are you hitting my _boyfriend_?" Roxas says smoothly and bends down, gripping my bicep and tugging me up much too easily. I try to fight the sway in my stance as the room swirls like the teacup ride at the amusement park. Roxas wraps an arm around my waist and I can feel the jealous glares on the back of my aching head.

Riku starts laughing, and I notice the slight bruise forming on his jaw, I smirk around the pain in mine. It's gonna be a big one, good.

"Because he got out of line, you should keep him on a shorter leash Roxy," He says and I launch myself forward only to be tugged backwards by Roxas.

"Now _baby_, calm down," Roxas says sweetly and I watch all the girls in the caff wet themselves.

"Let me go, _baby,_" I hiss and Roxas smiles, in this sweet I'm-so-perfect-everyone-loves-me candy coated kind of way and shoots Riku a look.

"You already saw it Riku, go see if you can give Sora a better one," Roxas says challengingly and the silver haired douche bag laughs again, smacking Roxas on the shoulder and going back to his table, the other two males I didn't notice follow him back.

"Let me go now, Roxas" I say and tug myself free taking my seat again, its kind of pathetic that I can only do that when he isn't even trying.

"Move over," he says and I look up from sipping on my chocolate milk. I cock an eyebrow

"I'm sitting here," he says and my eyes widen and milk flies out of my nose again. He jumps back and Demyx is too busy staring at the monster on my neck and looking worried, Naminé slides away and Zexion just looks to make sure it isn't near him.

"That's fucking sick!" he says and I cover my nose with my sleeve, I don't know why I blush but I do and Naminé is looking at me curiously. Something in her eyes makes me uneasy.

"Ax, are you okay? He hit you kind of hard," Demyx says and I turn my attention to him as Roxas stares at the milk like he's about to puke.

"I've gotten worse," I say and smile at him from behind my sleeve, Demyx rolls his eyes and gives me a look. Roxas is watching us, I can tell so I turn and glare at him.

"Why are you still here?" I hiss and he laughs, his eyes occasionally sliding towards the milk. Naminé puts her sketch pad down and grabs a few napkins from her bag, silently dropping them on the nose milk and wiping it away.

"There," she says quietly and I don't miss the bite in her voice, my eyes widen and Roxas just raises an eyebrow.

"Huh, so the school mute does talk," he says and she simply ignores him. He seems to get annoyed with waiting to me to give him a spot so he lifts me up and slips under me, dropping me onto his lap and I turn and look at him.

"What the fuck!" I say and the entire cafeteria is quiet again. That is starting to piss me off.

His response is to wrap his arms around my thin waist; he squeezes and gives me an innocent smile. I feel my cheeks flushing over again and I shift a bit, so that I'm resting most of my weight on one of his legs. He starts bouncing it slightly and the sight is actually disgustingly sweet at first glance to anyone who isn't a homophobe and has no clue who we are or the nature of our relationship. The butterflies have also decided to make my digestive system their home.

Naminé starts drawing furiously and Zexion is looking at me from over his book. It's so hard to keep the blush off my cheeks as Roxas' hands start to wander down, the pads of his fingers pressing into my inner thighs. I clear my throat and slide my hands under the table to stop him. He simply grabs my hands and moves them with his. His thumb is dangerously close to my no-no place and he seems highly aware of that, the whole cafeteria is watching and I feel like a caged animal.

I shift my eyes slightly and catch everyone at Roxas' table watching us closely, the silver haired guy is busy groping a tiny brunette, but the rest are all watching with these sick smirks on their faces. Their looks don't sit too well with me.

I snap my eyes down to my lap, Roxas' hands are now massaging my thighs and I'm so tense I think I'm going to break out in a sweat. Wait, I already have. Naminé glances up and you would have to know her really well to realize she's angry. Her eyes are darker and she looks at Roxas quickly before looking at me.

"Axel, are you alright?" she asks softly. I blush deeper and swallow thickly.

"I'm good," I say and pick up my milk to busy myself with drinking only to find that it's empty. I scowl.

Today has been a horrible day, but how come I can't wait for tomorrow?

_Oh, for fuck sakes_.

* * *

**A/N:** Alright, chapter two of Nose Milk is here!

I'd love to know what you guys thought, so review if you'd like!

Thanks for reading.


	3. What The Fuck Is A Sugar Dumpling?

**Chapter Three: What the fuck is a Sugar Dumpling?**

Bad things tend to happen during lunch time, I've noticed. Everything bad this week has happened during lunch, or well maybe bad things happen when Roxas is around. I think that is better, more true actually. I sigh and stare at Larxene, one of Roxas' friends or something. I don't know, she's been standing by my lunch table talking to me but I haven't been listening, I think it's better if I don't.

"Yo, Martinez are you listening?" and I'm snapped back into the realm of the living because she tugs on my red bangs, hard.

"Ow, what?" I hiss and rub at the sore spot now starting on my scalp. I glare up at her and she rolls her eyes at me.

"Roxas wants you to come to his house party on Saturday, I was going to ask if you're busy but judging by your track record…I doubt you are," she says, waving her hand around in the air by her head. I glare at it, and then move my glare towards her thin face.

"If he wants me to come, why doesn't _he_ just ask me?" I growl and she rolls her eyes at me, resting her hip against the edge of the table. Naminé,I realize is blushing and her eyes are stuck to the girl. I raise an eyebrow but the small blonde looks back down to her sketchpad quickly.

"Don't you know, he has football practice during lunch on Wednesdays," she rolls her eyes looking at me like I'm some unworthy worm on a boiling sidewalk.

"Oh, yeah. It must have slipped my mind when I was memorizing his schedules," I say, and put my hand flat on my chest.

"A smart ass huh?" she says and narrows her eyes at me, I catch the vibe that she wants to punch me in the face and I leer at her, extending my neck towards her and she looks disgusted.

"So I've been told," she glares at me and I actually feel like flinching but I hold my ground and take the glare like a man.

"I'll tell him, to personally invite you himself then," she says and turns walking away, an arrogant sway in her hips.

I catch Naminé watching the girl as she walks away, a wistful look in her eyes but before I have a chance to ask her what's wrong, I hear a shrill cry right by my ear. I jump away from the sound, and for the third time this week I spew milk out of my nose. I stick my index finger into my ear because it's fucking ringing!

"Axel you cannot be invited to the Saturday party!" It's freaking Kairi, and she looks like she's about to have a heart attack and a seizure at the same time.

"Well, I guess I am," I say smirking at my sister, and wiping my nose with the back of my sleeve. She glares at me, bending at the waist and coming nose to nose with me.

"You better not embarrass me with your freaky-ass stupidity!" she hisses and I smirk, rubbing my nose against hers in an Eskimo kiss that the entire cafeteria sees. She pulls away and looks at me like she's about to vomit.

"Whatever do you mean sister dearest? Am I not good enough for your high class friends?" I say batting my eyelashes and she glares at me. She's probably jealous because my make up is better then hers.

"You are such a fucking idiot! I hate you!" she screams and storms out of the cafeteria, her girl posse following after her to make sure her make up doesn't run if she cries. Zexion looks at me and I turn to stare at him.

"What?" I ask and he shakes his head slowly.

"Are you actually going to that party?" he asks softly and Naminé lifts her head, interest obviously peeked.

"Yeah, I don't see why not?" I reply and shrug, taking a few sips from my milk and savouring it's smooth taste on my tongue. Naminé's already cleaned the nose milk from the table top.

"It's going to be a house filled with dozens of the idiots you claim to despise, for hours on end. Do you want to put yourself in that predicament?" He asks and I roll my eyes, still sipping on my milk happily. Nothing can ruin milk for me, nothing.

"I plan on ruining as much of that night as I can. Plus, I'm Roxas' boyfriend…I wouldn't be very supportive if I didn't show up to his party," I say with a nonchalant shrug, Naminé looks at me and again I feel uneasy.

"I think you're starting to like him," she says and my eyes almost bug out of my head.

"What! No…Naminé I…I couldn't…he's a jerk," I say and stare at something over her boney shoulder. She shifts until she's in my line of vision again and I sigh dejectedly.

"Axel, you can lie to yourself, to those social workers and psychiatrists you see, but you can't lie to us," she says and I hear Zexion close his book. I vaguely wonder why the hell Demyx isn't here, he'd back me up for sure.

"It's obvious you harbour some sort of feelings for Mr. Anderson, or else you wouldn't put up with these humiliations," he says after Naminé and I feel like a cornered animal. So I do what any scared animal would do, I take our my claws and bare my teeth.

"I do not like Roxas, I hate him. I have since the first day I saw him, and the only reason I'm going along with this is so that you guys don't get the shit beat out of you everyday! Notice how no one's beat you up once this week? Yeah, you're fucking welcome!" I say angrily and stand, leaving the lunch table and ignoring their calls for me to come back.

They are so ungrateful…or maybe I'm being a bit of an idiot. I mean, they are right but I can't let them know that. I would be such a hypocrite! I can't admit to actually liking Roxas, that would be stupid of me.

I groan as I find myself wandering towards the stupid field at the back of the school. I step out into the cool air anyways and breathe deeply. It seems that the football team is done their practice and already moved back into the school, probably showering or whatever they do after practice. I groan again as I imagine a wet and naked Roxas, rubbing himself all over…and for fuck sakes!

I pat down my pockets in search for my squished pack of cigarettes (a bad, nervous habit) and realize with a pained moan that I left them in my locker. I stare up at the sky, but not really thinking about anything. Well, that's actually impossible, aren't people like thinking all the time? At least, I know my mind is never blank, though there are so many days that I wish it was. So many times I've wished to forget everything and just not be able to think at all.

I roll up my sleeves and stare down as the marks on my wrists. I run my fingers over the raised flesh and scowl at the slightly off colour of the ring shaped scars that wrap all around and the lines that draw strange, unrecognizable patters along my pale forearm never to be erased. I guess I'll never be able to forget completely.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Martinez," I hear from somewhere off to the side and I tug down my sleeves quickly turning to scowl at the teen who just ruined my moment of solitude. Only to see that it's Seifer and his goons

"Back off Seifer," I growl and the boy saunters over to me, looking at me and then his eyes shift down to my re-covered arm.

"What were you looking at?" he asks with a nasty grin on his face, I can tell he's planning something in that fat head of his.

"Nothing," I mutter and turn to walk back into the school, but he grabs my hood and tugs me harshly to the ground. I scramble to get up but Rai, this huge beast of a dude, is stomping on my back and pushing me into the muddy ground.

"Common Axel, you can tell us! We're buddies!" Seifer says nastily and I try to arch up and get the heavy foot off my spinal cord. He only pushes down harder.

"Get the hell off me you Neanderthal!" I shout and start squirming until Seifer lands a harsh kick to my side and I still my movements. Seifer kneels beside me, grabbing my arm but I tug it back and tuck it underneath myself as best as I can.

"Now, now Axel…just show me," Seifer says and he grips my sweater, I swing my arm out and manage to land a solid hit to the side of his head, knocking him over. Rai is momentarily distracted, torn between keeping me down or helping his friend and I push his foot up and off. I make a run for it, but Seifer is a lot faster at recovering then normal and he grabs my ankle from his place on the ground, making me fall again.

Rai stomps over, I swear I can feel the vibrations as he stops right by my head and bends down, picking me up roughly and turning me until my back is pressed against his chest and he's pinning me against him, his arms wrapped around my shoulders.

Seifer gets to his feet and dusts himself off quickly, before glaring at me and punching me hard in the face. Fuck, I've been getting hit way too much lately or well, more so then usual.

"I asked you nicely, chicken wuss, but now I gotta do this the hard way!" he says and grips my wrist pulling the sleeve up and they all stare at the mutilated flesh, disgust on each of the faces.

I don't know exactly what happens but something in my head snaps and I scream, Seifer backs away but not far enough and I push against Rai and lift my legs high enough to kick the boy in the chin. He stumbles back and Fuu races over to his side, I throw my head back successfully head butting Rai in the nose and he releases me with a curse. I race over to Seifer and straddle his hips and just start hitting. I feel the skin on my knuckles peeling away and I'm sure I'm still screaming. Rai tackles me off of Seifer after like a minute, and I'm guessing he only took that long because his nose looks really swollen. He was probably trying to figure out if it was broken or not.

"What the fuck is going on?" I hear the smooth voice and my head snaps in the direction of it, I feel the crazed look on my face slowly slip away as Roxas steps onto the scene, a perfect blonde brow raised high on his forehead.

Seifer is slowly helped up by Fuu and I think I gave him a concussion. Rai is still on top of me but at the sight of Roxas he quickly gets off, and looks unsure of what to do.

"Nothing to worry your pretty little head about," I spit out and I notice there's blood dribbling down my chin.

"Your swollen cheek and bleeding mouth say different," Roxas replies and I glare at him, getting up. Seifer shoots me a look but stops when he sees Roxas looking at him.

"I better not find out you started this shit, Seifer, or else you're going to be fucking sorry."

They all know better then to talk back to Roxas Anderson, he'll go all off-with-their-heads on their asses and they'll loose whatever popularity they may have. I'm sure if Seifer was more lucid though, he would have shot a comeback or two at the boy. Roxas walks over to me and grips my bicep, and pulls me to my feet. Rai helps Fuu lead a still slightly dazed Seifer off somewhere. They disappear behind the corner and I don't really care where they go, though I wish they'd just go to hell.

"I don't need you defending me," I hiss and tug my arm away from Roxas, the shorter boy looks at me and grabs my arm again pulling me towards him and I groan loudly.

"Sounded like you did. I heard you scream bloody murder!" he says eyes going a bit wider, I see something in them but I'm not too sure what it is exactly.

"Yeah well, I still don't need your help," I say stubbornly, tugging against Roxas' hold but the little fucker is just a persistent, strong, asshole.

"Let me go damn it!" I shout but Roxas pulls me so hard I stumble into him and he wraps his arms around my waist, bringing our bodies too close.

"But I haven't seen you aaaaaaalll day!" he says in a false whining tone, eyes shinning in a very convincible puppy dog pout.

"That's not my prob-" but I'm cut off when he tugs me down and shoves his tongue into my mouth in a rough kiss. He shoves me back against the school's brick wall and I gasp as his hands wander down from my waist to my hips and lower. I turn my head away panting, but he just moves to my neck, biting at the skin and it's like a fucking repeat of yesterday!

"R-Roxas…ahh…wait," I breathe as he grinds his hips harshly against me, he bites my neck hard and pulls away to stare at me. That unreadable emotion still buried underneath all the blue.

"We're at fucking school!" I hiss and he rolls his eyes, his hands going behind me to grip my ass roughly, this in turn causes me to buck forward, successfully rubbing the fronts of our pants together.

"But you want it so bad, don't you Axel?" he says and I bite my lip to keep from saying anything. He goes on the tips of his toes, bringing himself to the same level as my ear and I feel his hot breath fanning over my sensitive skin.

"You just want me, so bad," he purrs and I shut my eyes tight, my fingers digging into his shoulders but he doesn't even seem to feel it. He lets go of one of my ass cheeks and licks the blood off my chin, sliding his free hand along my thigh and higher until it's no longer touching me.

I hear a click and my eyes shoot open, he pulls away examining his phone with a shit-eating-grin. My eyes go wide and I stare at him, again my eye develops a twitch and I feel a pounding in my temples.

"What the fuck is that!" I say angrily and he shows me the phone, on the screen is my face. The problem? My hair is all stuck against the brick wall, completely dishevelled, my cheeks are a healthy red and I'm biting my lip with my eyes shut tight. I look like I'm being pounded right into the fucking wall. And just my luck, his phone has great resolution.

"Just a little memento, seeing as you never let me have any fun," he says and pockets the phone. I consider trying to fight him for it but squash that thought right away. I'm never too successful when it comes to testing forces with the blonde.

"We've been dating for three days, consider yourself lucky I let you shove your tongue down my throat!" I say angrily, why the fuck does everyone in the school think I'm some loose hoe?

"Well, not like you can stop me. You're mine Martinez, I can do whatever I want to you," Roxas purrs, and shoves me back against the wall. I grunt as he leans all his weight against me.

"You did agree to date me, and its for the dear old safety of those beloved friends," he continues and I roll my eyes. If only he knew that it wasn't just for them, if only he knew that I really do fucking like him even if he's a fucking asshole.

"But why?" is all I can force out of my mouth, my mind is frozen as I stare down at his perfect face.

"Just because, you don't need to know my reasons," he says and grips my hair roughly, crushing his lips against mine again.

"Why were you screaming anyways?" he asks, pulling away a hairs breath from my lips.

"None of your fucking business," I whisper and he smirks, I can see it through my half-lidded eyes.

"I'll be a good boyfriend, and I won't pry. But when you're done PMSing, you can find me and tell me. Oh, and what's your cell phone number?" he asks randomly, taking his phone out and I stare at the device.

"And don't even think of grabbing my phone, I'll break your girly fucking wrists,"

"Oh, you're words are enough to make me melt baby-doll!" I say and sigh dramatically, resting the back of my hand against my forehead.

"Shut the hell up, tell me your number," he growls and I groan before grudgingly tell him my cell phone number. I have to sound as discontent as possible because I don't want him to know I'm actually excited about him calling me ever.

"Ahh, that's perfect," he says and shows me the screen. Apparently every time I call or text he's going to see that fucking awful picture of me.

"You're a fucking bastard!" I say and he just laughs, throwing his head back and letting out deep, genuine laughter. Yeah, it wasn't that funny.

"You have the weirdest voice on the planet," he says calming down a bit and I cock an eyebrow at his completely uncalled for statement. He smiles at me, and I think my heart stops beating. The smile disappears as quickly as it came though, and in the background I can hear the lunch bell ringing.

"Want me to walk you to your class princess?" he asks and grabs my hand, pulling me into the school and I follow him, trying to ignore the people staring as soon as we walk into the school. I realize then, as we walk by a window showing me my reflection, that my hair is really fucked up, even more so then usual.

"I hate you," I hiss and tug my hand free, pulling my hood over my wild mane of hair. Roxas just laughs, shrugging it off and turning to me.

"You're coming to my party on Saturday, I expect you to be wearing something real sexy…like I don't know, really tight jeans or whatever it is you emo-fucks wear," he says, a disgustingly sweet smile on his face just oozing fakeness.

"Oh, I'll even throw on some fishnets just for you," I say and he narrows his eyes. People in the halls are slowing down to watch us.

"Oh thank you so much _Axie-kins_!" he says, but I can pick up the sarcasm and he's laying it on thick.

"You are most welcome, my little _sugar dumpling_!" I coo (I have no idea what the fuck that even is) and glare at him viciously. We both turn and stomp in different directions.

I try and keep my lips from spreading into a smile.

* * *

**A/N: Chapter Three!**  
Ugh, I cannot stay seated here, my legs are asleep D;

Thanks for reading and review if you'd like  
I love hearing from all of you!


	4. Hitting Girls

**Chapter Four: Hitting Girls**

"Martinez!" I groan _loud_, I don't think anyone has come to hate their last name as much as I hate mine right now. I am seriously considering changing my name to Axel Axel, just to see if someone would finally call me by the proper name. I turn and glare down at the person addressing me, it's Roxas of course and he's grinning at me like he's just won the lottery.

I try and kill the butterflies fluttering around when he looks at me with his big blue eyes, because I just can't feel like this around him. The guy is probably doing this for the kicks of dating me, I couldn't risk actually falling for him though I highly doubt that would ever happen. He's an asshole. A very cute asshole…

"You better be at the game after school today," he says and I raise a thin red brow high on my forehead. He did not just ask me to go to a school sporting event.

"Do you _pluck_ your eyebrows?" he asks next and I scrunch my criticized eyebrows together, before waving the question away and answering his first one.

"I'm not going to the game," I say and turn to leave; Roxas grabs my sleeve and spins me around to face him. I don't even know why I try anymore.

"Yeah you are, I'm on the field and I'm gonna fucking rock your world," he says with a smirk the devil would envy and I roll my eye skyward. I just want to go to my last class and get this day over with!

"I. _Hate_. Sports. You should know this, considering I am your boyfriend," I say sarcastically because I know for a fact that he knows nothing about me. I don't know why that disappoints me.

"I do know that, idiot. But you have to show your support, seeing as I am your boyfriend," he says before turning and walking in the opposite direction, probably heading towards the field. The football team always gets to miss their last class of the day before a game. Makes me wish I was even slightly talented so that I'd get to fuck around for an hour instead of being in a boring class

**~*~**

Guess where I am? Yeah, I'm sitting on the cold metal bleachers watching Roxas make fools out of everyone on the field even attempting to catch him. I know I said I wouldn't show up, but I have no will power. I've always wanted to see Roxas play, I've always wanted a reason to come and sit on these bleachers and just _watch_ him. He looks fucking beautiful out on the field, his short, muscular legs stretching as he takes quick, elegant strides to get away from all the idiots chasing him. He really is amazing, and I can see why the coach cums in his track pants every time he watches him play.

The game goes by faster then I'd like to admit, and I actually found myself getting anxious whenever the opposite team had the ball or pig skin or whatever the hell they call it. I will never admit it to anyone though; I was going to act as miserable as I could to show Roxas how displeased I was with this entire thing. Though it wasn't really as bad as I thought it would be. I watch with disgust as the cheerleaders gush and mewl after the players while they jog off the field, chanting about their victory and how utterly amazing they were. The losing team heads back to their school bus with their heads hung low in shame.

I slide off the bleacher and try to snake around the hoards of people rushing to go try and see who can brown-nose the best. It makes me slightly sick to my stomach to watch them, each person telling the team how _"great"_ or how "_fucking rad_" or how "_totally stellar_" they were on the field. As if they don't fucking know, I doubt they need the fucking ego boosts, idiots. I scowl and quickly make my leave; I spot Kairi trying to talk to Roxas, but being ignored in favor of the Silver haired douche muncher from before who is fondling this hyper brunette. I found out Sora (which is the brunette's name) is Roxas' brother from Demyx who was in Drama with the queer-as-hell teenager in grade ten. Why Demyx shared this tid-bit of information I will never know.

I'm close to disappearing into the crowd when a scream of my god-damned last name catches my attention and I stiffen. I turn and see Roxas walking over to me, his helmet held against his side by his arm and his cheeks are flushed red because of all the running in the cold. I realize he's actually a little sweaty, his golden bangs sticking to his forehead and temples. He actually looks more then a bit high, but I'm guessing it's the post-victory euphoria people talk about. I wouldn't know, I've never won anything in my life.

"You came!" he says, for once he smiles and it's genuine. I can tell because it makes his eyes shine and my heart clenches at the sight. He is one of the most gorgeous people I have ever seen in my damn life.

"Yeah, guess I did," I say fighting my blush tooth and nail because he's still smiling at me and I really wonder why.

"I thought you wouldn't. Shows you actually care a little huh?" he says, the smile changing into a smirk and I roll my jade eyes.

"Oh yeah, I care so much about you," I say as sarcastically as possible hiding the fact that I might care a little and he just chuckles before running a hand through his hair. His eyes suddenly zero in on my nose and he looks kind of horrified. I blink, lifting my index finger up to see if there was any snot or anything but there isn't.

"What the fuck is that in your nose?" he says, and comes up close to examine my nose, he tugs on my exposed septum ring and I wince, swatting his hand away.

"It's a piercing," I say with a shrug and he looks mortified yet curious. He's twisting his head every which way and looking at the horseshoe ring from every angle.

"How come I've never seen it before?" he asks and I shrug again, pushing the ring into my nose and hiding it from his view. His eyes widen in realization.

"I have to hide it during school hours, or else they'll get on my case," I say with another shrug and suddenly Roxas is called by his team. He grabs my wrist and it hurts but I don't say anything as he drags me towards the group of cave men, I mean, jocks…But is there a difference?

"Well if it isn't the love birds!" one of them coos, all of them laughing but it really wasn't that funny. Roxas shoots the person a glare, quickly shutting them up and Sora bounces up to me, his smile is enough to blind me for a few seconds.

"Hey! You're Axel right? I've heard lots about you," he says and I stare down at him, he looks exactly like Roxas only he has brown hair and seems a little nicer though underneath it all, I could see some _evil_. It's kind of creepy, but he called me Axel so I like him.

"Yeah, I'm the great Axel," I say and he giggles cutely but he's quickly pulled away and into the chest of the silver haired douche that I hate so much.

"Don't you have your own Anderson to pester?" he sneers and the brunette scowls, worming out of his grasp and standing by my side with a cute little look that was supposed to be a glare.

"Riku, leave him alone! He's nice," Sora says and Riku rolls his eyes, pulling him back and that's when I realize Kairi is trailing behind Roxas like a lost puppy. I raise a brow at her but she ignores me, and instead tries to talk to Roxas again. The boy just rolls his eyes and turns to Riku mumbling something about how annoying girls could be. I watch with amusement as my sister makes a complete idiot out of herself until Roxas jabs me in the ribs and I look at him angrily.

"I'm gonna head home now, want a ride?" he asks and I shrug. I know he's going to force me into his car anyway so I just follow him. I ignore the cat-calls, the jeers and the laughter of the team as we head towards the car. There is one I cannot ignore though.

"Bring your earplugs Roxas, he's a screamer!" and I turn sharply, eyes set to kill because the person who just said that is Kairi. She's glaring at me angrily and my mouth goes completely dry. It seems that no one else heard her, or understood her well enough to actually know what she meant by that but I did. The scars on my wrist burn as she smirks at me and I just can't wrap my head around it. The fact is Kairi is a fucking bitch, and that's just about it. I see red, and by the time the colour is gone I realize I just punched Kairi in the nose and there's blood streaming through the seams of her fingers as she holds her nose and cries loudly.

"You fucking bastard!" she howls and staggers to get up, the girls in the cheer squad are screaming things at me but I don't pay attention to them. All my rage is focused on Kairi because I cannot get past the sting I feel in my chest. I always knew she was a bitch, I always knew she could be heartless and completely evil but I never imagined it to be this bad. I mean, I'm her fucking brother! Never in my life would I have done something like this to her, no matter how bad things got between us because no matter who she is or what she does she's my sister and deep down I love her.

Well not anymore, fucking heartless bitch! I feel my fist twitch and I know I'm going to hit her again.

"You fucking bitch!" I scream and throw another punch; I know she can take a hit though. She always took them from _Dad_ easy enough. "You fucking heartless bitch!" I scream and a huge jock grabs me by the neck roughly and pushes me away from the girl who's sprawled on her back. She gets back up though without any help and glares at me heatedly; I know she wants to kill me. I can see it. She's been looking at me like that since I was eleven.

I try to breathe but I think that idiot crushed my Adam's apple, I'm on my back and Kairi comes to stand over me. The blood is slowly drying and her cheek is swollen but besides that she's perfectly fine. I glare up at her and I notice my eyes are watering; I blame it on the lack of oxygen though.

Roxas is standing a few feet away too shocked to do anything, half the football team is just staring as the scene unfolds in front of them. Kairi leans down to whisper "I hate you Axel, I fucking do," and with that she turns, walks towards the terrified cheer squad and they lead her away. The jocks are staring at me, and one looks sick.

"You're a freak," he spits and they all leave, Roxas finally walks over and he looks at me angrily.

"Why the hell did you just punch a girl? Don't you know it's wrong to hit women?" he hisses and I stand up, rubbing my neck and trying not to choke on the tears that are threatening to fall. I will not cry though, I'd rather choke to death then cry because of what Kairi said. Those memories she brought up are buried again as I slide on my mask of indifference. Roxas looks at me like he knows something is wrong, but he just doesn't care enough to press.

"Kairi isn't a girl, she's a fucking _demon_," I say angrily and Roxas actually swats my hand from my neck and looks at the slowly forming bruises where the huge idiot pressed into my skin.

"You bruise easy or something?" he asks completely dropping the subject of Kairi and for that I'm grateful.

"Yeah, always have," I say and I feel the bitterness dripping off my tongue and leaving a sour taste on my lips. Roxas just watches me and starts walking to his car making sure I follow. I do because I want to get home before Kairi; I want to tell Reno that I punched her before he sees the damage himself. I groan as I climb into the passenger seat and let my head smack into the dashboard.

"He's gonna fucking call her, I know he is," I mumble to myself quietly because after Reno see's the way I lashed out at Kairi he's going to send me back to Aerith, that god damned social worker.

"Who's going to call who?" I realize Roxas got around the large car a lot faster then I anticipated and he heard my crazy grumbling. I sit up straight and click on my seatbelt, completely ignoring his question as he starts up the gas-guzzler and pulls out of the lot.

"You're really fucked up, you know that?" he says as he drives, he's a good driver, attentive to the road and obeying the laws. Even when he speeds up, I don't feel my heart jack hammering into my ribs like it used to when my father would drive. I feel…safe in his car.

"Yeah, I know," I sigh and rest my forehead against the cool glass; I can feel a killer migraine forming slowly behind my eyes and spreading over my brain like a nice tight blanket.

"What the hell is wrong with you? You're acting all weird," Roxas groans and shoots a look at me from the corner of his eye. I don't want to act affected by the things Kairi says, but it's so hard to just ignore the blow after it's dealt. You know, it's like when someone punches you in the face and you try to ignore the pain but it's there and it's not going away no matter how much you don't want to show that it hurts.

"I'm fine, just take me home," I say quietly and it must shock him into silence because he doesn't say anything, he just drives. I'm glad he stops talking; I probably would have started to actually cry if he kept pestering me. He stops in front of my apartment and I climb out of the car, when I turn to close the door I look at him and he's watching me strangely. I send him a weak smile and his eyes widen.

"Thanks for the ride," I say and he seems so confused for a second but then he just smirks and flicks his blonde hair out of his eyes. I notice he's still in his foot ball gear.

"Thanks for showing up, and you owe me a kiss," he winks at me and I feel my throat clenching as I step on the ledge of the car and heave myself over the passenger seat and peck him on the cheek. I smirk as I pull away and shut the door. He rolls his eyes but I see a faint smile tugging at his lips as he reverses and merges back to the street with the other cars. I realize that I'm starting to like him even more then I did before, and that really fucking sucks.

I walk quickly up the few steps and head upstairs to my apartment. I know Reno's home, as I approach the door and see the light from underneath. I unlock it and slowly push it open, my heart's pounding hard because I know once Kairi walks in with her face all black and blue Reno's going to call Aerith again and I'm going to have to go back to those horrible sessions. I take a deep breath and walk in, closing the door softly and heading towards the kitchen where he usually is, eating or something.

"Yo squirt…Axel? Are you okay?" he says and gets up when he sees my face, I must look pretty angry or something, I'm not really paying attention. Reno slides off the kitchen chair and comes over to me, gripping my shoulder and giving me a rough shake.

"Yo, Axel?" he says again and I pull away, turning and walking out of the kitchen.

"I punched Kairi in the face," I say as I quickly hurry to get into my room but Reno's always been faster then me. He grabs my arm and tugs me back, I dully note that everyone these days can freaking pull me around easily.

"What?" Reno asks his eyes wide as he stares at my face, seeing I'm completely serious. The front door opens and Kairi steps in, Reno sees her face and lets go of me going directly towards her and she throws her arms around him, sobbing like a fucking drama queen. She didn't cry at school.

"R-R-Reno, h-h-he punched me," she says burying her face in his chest and he looks at me over his shoulder, I'm glaring at Kairi because she's so fake that I don't even know what to do about it. I want to light her hair on fire, I want to spit on her, I want to fucking punch her again.

"Axel…Kairi calm down…" Reno seems torn between being angry with me and hearing the story first. I stare at Kairi as I decide to tell Reno what happened but she beats me to it and looks up at my brother. Putting on her best _I'm-a-poor- helpless-little-angel_ face and it's the fucking court case all over again.

"He just came at me after the foot ball game, I-I-I don't even know why!" she says and I see her trembling. Someone give the girl a fucking Oscar, this is too much! She always manages to make me seem like a lying sack of shit.

"You lying bitch! You know perfectly well why I punched you!" I scream and Reno shoots me a look, cradling her head against his chest protectively. I feel my heart clench at the sight, and I realize Kairi is peaking from her spot with a cruel smirk on her lips. I feel a million times angrier and I stomp right over to them until I'm standing nose to nose with Reno.

"She's fucking lying! I wouldn't just hit her for no reason!" I say, my voice low and the hatred for that fucking bitch is clearly visible. Kairi hiccups and sniffles from some where a few inches below me and Reno is staring at me like he doesn't know who to believe.

"What's your reason then?" he says and his tone hurts me because he's usually so cool and seeing him go on this maturity mode makes me really wish mom was still here.

"She…she fucking brought _it _up!" I hiss and Kairi pulls away from Reno's chest and looks at me, I can see the disgust on her face but Reno can't cause she's standing with her back to him.

"Get off it Axel, we all know it was just a lie! You ruined our family with your lies!" she yells and I lunge at her, Reno moving quickly to stop me. My teeth are bared and I feel the tears welling up in my eyes as I fight harshly against Reno's grip but he's fucking strong. Why is everyone stronger then me?

"FUCK YOU KAIRI, _FUCK YOU_!" I scream and I'm hysterical at this point, I'm chocking on tears that I can't stop and she's glaring at me, her fake tears dried as my real ones suffocate me.

"You know it's true," she whispers and I see the hate in her eyes, as she's blaming it all on me all over again and I can't fucking take it!

"Kairi, get to your fucking room!" Reno screams and the girl is momentarily shocked. She looks at me seeing the damage done walks past us coolly, completely unfazed by the fact that she just wreaked havoc on my mental state and locks herself in her room. I stare at the door, with every intention of going over there, splintering the wood and wringing her neck.

"Axel, calm down yo," Reno says, his grip still tight, but I know he'll let me go if I stop looking so rabid. I take a deep breath, exhaling through my nose and I feel a little better, though if Kairi were to appear I know I'd be ready to kill her in ten seconds flat.

"Now tell me what the hell happened," he says and I remember when we were smaller for some reason. It seems so long ago, but I remember it now as I look at him. Ever since… things happened he had to grow up, and he never wanted to grow up this fast. He's only 21 and he already has to take care of two kids alone. I remember how he used to be, and now there are only fragments of that left. I feel something inside of me twist at the sight of his tired face.

"I'm sorry," I whisper and look down. If there's anything Axel Martinez cares about at all, it would be Reno and my friends, I'd say my family but all I have left is Reno and my mom and she isn't here.

"For what, bro?" Reno says, and his smile is tired and I really wish he could just go live his life.

"For fucking up," I say bitterly and Reno shifts on the couch, I know he's always been uncomfortable when it came to giving advice or even listening to problems so I stop myself and look away.

"Ax, I think I should call Dr. Aerith," Reno says quietly and I bit my lip to stop myself from lashing out at him. I don't want to go back to her; I don't want to deal with any of this anymore.

"Fine," I say and stand up, but Reno stops me, staring up at me expectantly.

"Why'd you deck her in the face?" he asks and I sigh, dropping back onto the couch and staring straight.

"I did it because she called me…a _screamer_, and no one else knew what she meant by it but I did Reno…and I just lost it, alright?" I say and he places his hand on my shoulder, looking directly at me and even if it's a small gesture it means a lot to me.

"You're pretty fucked up Ax," he says and I go to get up but he stops me again, shaking his head "I don't say that to hurt you, stop being so damn sensitive. What I mean is that you need this help, and you're gonna get it, you keep waking up with those…night terrors and now you almost broke Kairi's nose," he looks at me and I see he's completely serious about this and that means no one is going to change his mind. I nod and he gets up, heading to the kitchen and grabbing the phone. I groan but he just chuckles as he dials the number he's actually memorized.

"Can I go to my room?" I say and he nods, holding the phone with his shoulder and I walk past him, stopping at the door frame "Just…tell me when the appointment is," I say and he nods again and I leave and head to my room.

This is all Kairi's fault I conclude, I mean; if she would have just kept her mouth shut I would have never hit her. I plop onto my bed and my body feels drained, today was way too long and I just want to sleep for years!

I hear my cell phone ringing and I figure it's Demyx seeing as he's the only one who'd ever call me. I answer it with a bored "Yes?"

"_Hey there,"_ and it's Roxas talking instead of Demyx, there's a few sounds in the background but I ignore them and focus on the question of why the hell is he calling me?

"Why are you calling me?" I ask and there's a few snickers in the background, I'm not sure if it's him laughing or someone else.

"_Can't I call my beloved?"_ he asks and again the snickers. It's starting to get on my nerves and I clutch the small phone tightly.

"No, you can't. Leave me alone," I hiss and Roxas makes a shocked sound, then he's laughing like crazy and I'm almost sure there's someone else on the other side with him.

"_Awe but Axel,"_ he says, and he holds the 'L' in my name for a few extra seconds _"I miss you! I mean, you were being such a prick on the drive home, I never even got my good-bye hand job!" _he says snickering and I feel my face go completely red.

"What are you talking about?" I ask angrily, he's making it seem like I always fucking jack him off when he drives me home.

"_Aww, always so shy Axel,"_ he laughs and I know for a fact there are other people there because along with his laugh, I hear others. I also take note of the slur in his voice, is he drunk…on a weekday? Wow.

I vaguely wonder why I don't break up with him, he's such a major fucking douche-bag but I feel my heart race when he starts talking though I'm not paying attention. His voice alone brings the butterflies back, and I can picture his face in my mind's eye, so perfect and I've wanted this since the moment I saw him. I don't think I've even liked anyone like this in my entire life. I groan loudly because I know that no matter how shit awful he treats me, I wouldn't have the guts to break up with him. I couldn't just stop my supply of kisses or touches; I've wanted them for so long. I had been ignored by him for 3 years, and now he noticed me. I'm not going to throw that away, even if it does make me seem a little pathetic, this is probably the best thing that's happened to me in years.

"_What's the matter Axel? Getting a little hot under the collar?"_ Roxas says referring to my groan in one of the most seductive voices I've ever heard in my life, the tone alone makes heat pool right under my belly button.

"N-n-no," I stutter like a complete jackass and I hear Roxas laughing with his friends, _at me_. I swallow thickly and before I can say good-bye he's talking again.

"_It's okay Axie-Kins, don't be so shy! What happened to your bite and that entire tough guy act you have at school?" _he asks and I can hear the smirk in his voice. I glare at the wall.

"It isn't an act, now I have to go…I'll see you tomorrow," I say quickly and hang up before he can say anything else and keep me on the line making myself look even freakier then usual. I push my face into my pillow and start the process of trying to suffocate myself, pulling up and gasping when the need for air gets to be too much. If you're wondering what the fuck I'm doing, I couldn't even tell you. It's just that ever since I was little, holding my face into a pillow and holding my breath until my lungs ached always helped me relax. After all these years, it still works.

My room door opens and I pull away from the pillow gasping for air and staring at Reno. He has an eyebrow raised high on his face, almost disappearing into his hair line, but he knows what I'm doing so he just ignores me gaping at him like a creep.

"You have an appointment on Friday, now get your ass our here and eat," he says and walks away leaving my door open. I sigh and get up, feeling a lot calmer and knowing that if I see Kairi, I'm not going to try and stab her with a kitchen utensil.

I realize today is Thursday, and I wonder why Reno just didn't say tomorrow. I shrug to myself and walk out into the dinning room. Kairi isn't there and I smile, Reno must have told her to stay in her room. I sit down in front of my food and start pushing things aside until I see Reno and he tosses me a box of my chocolate milk. I smile brightly as I stick the straw in, I hear him chuckling and I look up.

"I swear that's the only thing that makes you happy, yo" he says and I roll my eyes just drinking the milk. I like kissing Roxas so much cause he kind of tastes like chocolate, okay that's part of the reason.

"It tastes just how mom used to make it," I say and Reno goes quiet, before sitting and drinking his own milk box.

"Yeah, it kind of does," he says and we smile before finishing dinner in silence.

* * *

**A/N:** Ahh, I've been so busy these last couple days!  
This one is for you Jenny!

Anyways, enjoy some Nose Milk ;D  
and wonder wtf is wrong with Martinez, lol.


	5. Plans, Dates and Heartless Sisters

**Chapter Five: Plans, Dates and Heartless Sisters.**

"Naminé, I have to talk to you," I say quietly and the girl looks up from her sketch pad, just as I had suspected she had been enjoying the window seat and drawing scenery. She closes her little black book and looks up at me with questioning eyes. I glance around the cafeteria and get up slowly; she doesn't ask me any questions and gets up too. Demyx watches us, and Zexion doesn't even glance up from his book.

"Where are you guys going?" Demyx asks and I shake my head, telling him to be quiet as I head out of the cafeteria with Naminé close behind me. There was something I just had to know. Apart from the horrible nightmares that had started again, I kept thinking about what Roxas had said to me on the phone about Naminé and I just had to know.

We walk around the empty halls for a few minutes before I lead her to the theater and we stand by the doors. She looks up at me and tucks her blonde hair behind her ear, and tilts her head to the side. I sigh and look up at the ceiling.

"Naminé, do you like Larxene?" I ask and she doesn't say anything so I look down at her, her eyes are wide and there's this fiery blush spreading across her pale cheeks.

"N-no," she tries to lie and I shake my head with a soft smile, she quickly realizes she can't lie to me and sighs deeply, "Alright, I do...but you like Roxas so you can't say anything to me," she says defensively and I raise my hands up in mock-surrender. She smiles at me and her blush dwindles down somewhat but it's still there.

"How do you know I like Roxas?" I say and Naminé shakes her head, a light smile on her face.

"Demyx came me and Zexion one day in first year, saying that the new kid liked Roxas Anderson," Naminé giggles and I groan, I had almost forgotten that I told Demyx about my crush on Roxas. I remember him asking me if I was gay and I told him I was, and that I liked this certain blonde. That's when I was told exactly who Roxas was. Demyx was the one who taught me the high school hierarchy when I first arrived.

"Should have known he'd blabber it out," I say bitterly and Naminé just shakes her head, her soft hair fluttering off her shoulders. "But wow Nami, Larxene? Isn't she like…psychotic?" I say and Naminé glares at me before picking at the hem of her too long sweater.

"She's been in my art class since grade eight and I always help her…she can be really funny and sweet," Naminé says with a sigh and it hurts to know that she's suffering. Larxene would never consider dating Naminé, hell I'd never even seen them speak. "You don't have to look at me like that, I know I'd never have a chance," she says sadly and I hug her, suddenly feeling the urge to hold her and console her. I feel her thin arms wrap around my waist and she mumbles a quiet thank you as we part.

"Don't worry, we'll have her fall for you some how…"I say trailing off and tapping my chin with my index finger. Naminé looks up at me with wide eyes and I look down at her smiling. "It shouldn't be so hard, right?" I ask and she just looks around and chews on her bottom lip.

"I don't know Axel…" she says quietly and I roll my eyes, gripping her wrist and heading back towards the cafeteria. I don't have a plan but I've never needed a plan before. I have to get Naminé with Larxene and that's pretty much all I know. We burst through the doors, because I like making scenes, and I walk back to my table and sit down. Naminé looks around self-consciously, sitting down slowly and I feel everyone at Roxas' table looking at me.

"Zexion," I start and make sure he's looking up from his book about death or whatever it is he reads, when he looks at me and I know I have his attention, I continue. "I need you to help me formulate a plan of sorts," I say and Naminé is watching me with wide scared eyes and I smile reassuringly at her.

"What does this plan entail?" he asks, slowly setting down his book with a little smile on his face. If there is anything Zexion loves (besides Demyx, but that's getting off topic) it's planning and scheming. It's like the dude's been doing this his entire life, and maybe even before that. Though, I don't really believe in reincarnation or anything.

"Well, it entails bringing two people together," I say using his word to try and sound smart. He eyes me, raising a blue brow high on his forehead but I know he's intrigued. If my plan involves manipulating people, he'll have the time of his little emo life. "We gotta get Nami here with Larxene, but we have to make Larxene ask Nami and all that," I say and I realize I've leaned in like it's some sort of classified spy information. Zexion glances at Naminé as she's blushing so much; I think her head might explode from too much blood.

"I see, and she wants to be with that savage nymph because…" he trails off looking between me and Naminé and the girl sighs, shooting Zexion a look before twiddling her little thumbs.

"She's really sweet and funny, I've talked to her before-" Demyx cuts her off and looks with wide eyes at the other blonde.

"How have you talked to her? Do you realize who we are and who she is? Like…that goes against…everything!" Demyx says and I worry he's foaming at the mouth; he's really stood by this hierarchy thing since day one.

"Demyx, Larxene doesn't care about that…she's just rude to everyone, even those at Roxas' table," Naminé says and when I think about it, it's actually true. Larxene Petrova was a fucking crazy ass bitch, and I don't think she cares who's on the receiving end of her attacks, as long as there is someone. She doesn't believe in the hierarchy because in her mind, she's above all…period.

"That is very likely Demyx, Larxene seems to be the type to go against the norm and the rules," Zexion says consolingly to his crush-since-the-beginning-of-life. Well, I'm guessing it's been since the beginning of his life because they've known each other that long and I can tell Zexion has the hots for Demyx and vice versa. They are just too chicken shit to do anything about it. I scoff mentally at them, they are complete jackasses…and I'm kind of a hypocrite.

"I know she is," Naminé says softly in defense of her soon-to-be girlfriend. I smile at her, taking a sip of my abandoned milk and I feel someone smack me harshly on the back. My precious milk ends up spewed on the table via my nose because I got fucking scared. The laughs I hear really shouldn't bother me, but they do.

"Do you have a complex with doing that?" Roxas asks, leaning casually against the table with his hip and I glare up at him as the butterflies ravage my insides. I can feel the people's eyes on me but I try to ignore them and think of a witty comeback.

"Maybe," is all I can come up with and I feel so stupid right now. Roxas just smirks and I try to ignore the butterflies but god damn it they are eating away at my stomach's mucus lining and all the HCl in my stomach is starting to eat away at the actual muscle, or at least it feels that way.

"So, do your little friends wanna come to the party on Saturday?" Roxas asks examining his nails like he's bored and I look at my _'little friends'_. Demyx's eyes are glowing and I swear I've never seen him this excited about anything, Zexion looks completely unfazed but you'd have to know him to realize that he's totally shitting bricks and Naminé is blushing because she knows Petrova will be there…Damn it, did I just use her last name?

"I don't know, ask them, they are sitting right here," I say and pick up my milk box; I also note that Naminé is freaking fast when it comes to cleaning up all my spilt milk. Roxas turns his head slightly and looks at all of them, something in his eyes makes me uneasy but I don't call him on it. Demyx nods his head excitedly and Naminé just looks up at him, Zexion seems torn but eventually nods.

"Good, party starts at 8 on Saturday, but I want you there early Axel," he says and looks at me with that weird…glint in his eyes and I just nod my head. He pushes himself away from the table and stops, he's looking in the direction of his friends and suddenly he bends down and grips the back of my head, crashing our lips together and kisses me roughly. He pulls away with a smirk and waltzes back over to his friends.

I suddenly get this weird idea in my head so I get up, I don't know why but in the back of my mind I want us to be a good couple, a real one that goes on dates and the like. So, I swallow any nerves and I walk up to his table appearing cocky and filled with confidence. I see Kairi trying to talk to Roxas but if he was ignoring her before, he's doing it for sure now since I'm standing by his table. He looks at me up and down and smirks, "Can't get enough of me huh, Martinez?" he says and I groan, almost regretting coming over here.

"That's not it…I was wondering if you wanted to catch a movie later?" I say and everyone at his table seems to be holding back giggles, like they're all in on this big secret and I have no idea what it is. Roxas looks up at me and smirks wider, this sadistic look on his face that makes me inwardly cringe. I hate sadistic people.

"Sure, I'll pick you up at 7:30," he says and winks at me, turning back to his table and talking to Riku and his brother, completely ignoring Kairi as she tries to tell him her opinion. It makes me sick that she tries so hard when he doesn't even like her. I walk away to my table trying not to smile and I sit down, feeling light and fluffy. Man, I really do like him.

I look at the clock hanging on the wall and realize I have my appointment with Aerith, so I have to sign out and make my way to her office. I get up from the table and my friends look up at me, questions in all their eyes. I scratch the back of my head and shrug my shoulders, telling them I have to sign out.

"Oh, alright, see you later!" Demyx says with a happy little smile on his face, Zexion waves and Naminé just smiles softly. I turn walking away, heading to the attendance office to get my sign out slip. I never liked talking to that lady, but Reno had already called in this morning telling them I was going to be leaving.

I walk in and out quickly, crinkling the little white sheet when I shove it in my too-tight pocket. The attendance secretary always seems so bitter and I often wonder what happened to make her that way. I chew on my bottom lip and flip my septum ring out, making my way off the school grounds. I have to ask Reno to get me a new pack of cigarettes I note as I climb into the bus.

Aerith's office was uptown where all the fancy schmancy people resided and I have no idea how Reno affords any sessions with this lady. The ride is quick and I'm climbing out of the bus stop right in front of the office in no time, the building isn't too big but it's still enough to make my stomach twist with anxiety. Seeing this place brings back so many memories, and I see the ambulance emergency entrance. I remember when Aerith called them and they came and took me away, I had a break down in her office and went completely insane. I'll always remember that day. It was when they locked me up for a few months in that psyche ward. I'm busy thinking the entire time and by the time I reach her floor, the nerves I've been ignoring attack me full force and my hands start to shake as I walk in. I go to the reception and the pudgy lady's eyes widen at the sight of me. She smiles brightly and stands up, leaning over her desk and hugging me.

"Axel Martinez! I didn't think I'd see you again," she says pulling away and going over to get my file from a cabinet that I never wanted to see open again. I try and force a smile on my face as she hands me the folder and escorts me to the room where Aerith will be seeing me. I take a seat and place the file on her desk. I'm only waiting for a few minutes, Aerith always punctual and good with time. She walks in quietly and takes a seat, her eyes warm and happy when she looks at me. Her long hair is in a tight bun on her head, the pink ribbon still present.

"Well, hello Axel," she says softly and she sometimes reminds me of Naminé, but maybe that's because they are both so nice. I look around her office and notice that the hole I punched in the wall was patched up and fixed, but of course it would be. It had been a few years since I had done the damage.

"Reno called me this morning, he told me you were screaming in your sleep again," she says flipping open the folder and going to a new page. I look down and I appreciate how she doesn't beat around the bush with small talk. I had told her never to do that on our first session, and she still remembers.

"I've been having nightmares again," I say quietly and she looks up at me, she never seemed to be judging me so I always poured out everything to her. I sigh and bite my bottom lip.

"Axel, take your time and tell me whatever you'd like," she say softly and folds her hands on top of the desk. It calms me a little to know that she isn't writing everything down yet, I always hated it when she would write as I spoke.

"Kairi brought it up again…and I kind of hit her. I'm still not too good with controlling my anger, and well, I just lost control. The screams at night are because of the nightmares. In the dreams…it…it's happening all over again," I say and the scars on my arms burn so I rub them over my sleeves.

"Have you cut yourself since our last session, two years ago?" she says and picks up her pen, writing something down and I wait for her to finish.

"No, I haven't…but I've wanted to," I say and look down and the wooden floor. I always liked the way it looked; it gave the room a warm, cozy feel.

"Why?" she asks quietly and I take in a shuddering breath, releasing it slowly and looking up at the ceiling lights.

"I miss my mother and I feel like it's my fault that she is where she is. I always…feel like he can just come back at anytime and ruin my life," I say tears welling up in my eyes but I hold them back as she writes down a few more things.

"She only has five years left, doesn't she?" Aerith asks and I nod my head, peeling the skin off my lips by chewing them too much.

"She only went for attempted murder, so they just gave her 11 years, plus the judge sort of understood why she tried to kill him," I say quietly and Aerith nods her head. "They were released last year though," I say and feel my throat constricting, at the mention of them and Aerith notices my discomfort.

"Well, you're safe now Axel, they can't hurt you anymore. You have Reno and you've grown a lot since then, plus you guys moved apartments correct? You have nothing to worry about, now," she says picking up her pen and writing something quickly before continuing, "Why don't you tell me about the night terrors?" she asks and I nod my head, thankful that I don't have to talk about my mother or them anymore.

"It's really just…a replay of when I was twelve, and I can't do anything to stop it," I mumble looking down and Aerith writes more things down.

"I see, Axel when these things happen you need to talk to someone. When you don't have a session with me, I want you to confide in Reno or maybe a friend you've told, or maybe even write down your feelings. I can prescribe some sleeping pills if you'd like, and besides that our time is done for today," she says pulling out her prescription pad and I look at it, before agreeing. "Also, I want you to come back next Friday; these sessions were helping you before. I want to make sure you have me around if you happen to have another episode," she says tearing the prescription and handing it to me when I walk over to her. I thank her kindly and agree to come the following Friday, by the time I leave her office it's 4:30 and traffic is heavy. I should get home around 6, if I'm lucky.

**~*~**

When I get home it's 5:45 and I run inside, racing to get to the bathroom and take a quick shower. Reno is sitting on the sofa stuffing his face with some sort of take-out and he looks up when I race into the house.

"Yo, what's the rush?" he says and looks up at me, I notice Rude is sitting beside him and I wave weakly at them.

"I'm going out at 7:30, so I need to shower and get ready," I say, a little out of breath and Reno raises a thin brow at me, Rude just sits there not really doing anything, I'm not even sure if he's breathing. I figured him out long ago, he's a robot that Reno created and passed off as a friend and he hides him and brings him out sometimes. At least that's what I think because Rude doesn't talk to anyone unless completely necessary so how are he and Reno best friends? See where I'm heading? He's a robot.

"Oh you don't say, goin' on a date?" Reno says wiggling his eyebrows like an idiot and I roll my eyes, tell him to eat me and he makes dramatic gagging sounds as I walk away towards the bathroom. On my way there I run into Kairi, she's walking out of the bathroom and heading to her room. We stop and she glares at me, I feel my hands twitching with the want to wring her neck but I hold back and take a deep breath, moving out of the way to let her pass. Instead she stands there and cocks her hip.

"I don't even know why he's dating you, I mean you're used goods," she sneers and I grind my teeth together, my hands shaking violently as I try and hold myself back. I tell myself not to hit her again, and I tear my eyes away from her.

"Reno, come get Kairi before I fucking smash her face into the wall," I call out, and I hear Reno get off the couch. He walks up to my side and looks at Kairi, his face lost that happy glow it had in the living room, now he looks tired and angry. I push my way past her a bit harder then necessary sending her into the wall and I slam the bathroom door shut. I hear them arguing outside of the door.

"Leave him alone Kairi, the things you say hurt him," Reno says and I can picture him rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"He deserves it, he ruined our family Reno," Kairi hisses and I feel my blood go cold, my throat closes and I turn to go shower but my legs aren't moving.

"It wasn't his fault those sick bastards raped him Kairi!" Reno shouts, my legs go weak and I slide down onto the floor, pulling my knees up to my chest and resting my forehead on them.

"Don't you dare talk about Dad and Tio Miguel like that! Axel is just a sick faggot who always hated Dad, and now mom is in jail because of his lies!" I hear the slap bounce off the walls and at first I don't know who hit who, until I hear Kairi start to cry and Reno sends her to her room. I hear her door slam and then Reno's knocking on the bathroom door; I reach over and unlock it from my place on the floor. I didn't even notice I started crying. Reno sits down beside me and sighs heavily.

"Axel, I'm sorry-" I cut him off shaking my head, not looking at him when I start talking.

"It's not your fault Reno, Kairi is just a bitch," I say with a shuddering breath and Reno puts his arm around my shoulders and rubs my arm a bit in a manly, comforting way.

"I know you aren't a liar Ax, and don't ever think it's your fault alright? I would have tried to kill them if I was home," Reno says and I turn to look at him, tears still filing my eyes.

"No, I wouldn't have been able to bear losing you and mom," I say and he smiles at me, before standing up and pulling me to my feet.

"Good, cause I'm stickin' around yo," he says and ruffles my hair, making me glare at him but I can't help the smile that blooms on my face.

"Now, get ready for your date. Don't be home too late," he says and walks out of the bathroom shutting the door behind him and leaving me to my own devices.

I turn and stare at myself in the mirror, my make up had started to run when I started crying and now it was all over my cheeks. I sigh heavily and climb into the shower. This was going to be my first date ever, and with Roxas Anderson. I stare down at my scarred arms and shiver, memories flashing in my mind's eye. I can almost feel the rope burning into my skin and tearing it raw, I can almost hear myself screaming bloody murder for my uncle and dad to leave me alone. I shake my head and start washing out my hair, that's in the past and I have to forget it, I have to get over it.

I step out of the shower and check the time. It's 6:30 and that gives me enough time to blow dry my hair and get dressed.

Fuck, I was going on a date with Roxas Anderson. I smiled, forgetting everything that had just happened and letting the excitement fill me instead of the sadness and anger I usually felt. It was weird how Roxas could make me feel like this, and I just smile as I walk out of the bathroom and into my room. My feeling's for Roxas were getting even stronger, so maybe tonight I could act like myself instead of the sarcastic jerk I always act like around Roxas. I guess I want him to see the real me. With that in mind, I get dressed quickly, smiling the entire time like some love struck chick.

Roxas Anderson is a good thing I conclude, and boy did he happen at a good time.

* * *

**A/N:** Okay, who's going to feel bad for Axel if Roxas hurts him?  
Let's just hope that isn't the case cause he seems really into the blonde, hm?

Anyways, thanks for reading and review if you'd like (:

is being mean D;


	6. The Real Axel Martinez

****

Chapter Six: The Real Axel Martinez

Roxas pulls up in front of my house around 7:45. I hop off the couch and race outside when he buzzes my apartment. Reno yells that he wants to meet him, but really I don't want to drag Roxas all the way upstairs, so with a promise of a next time, I bounce out the door and downstairs to where Roxas is. He isn't driving his big SUV and in its place is a small sleek BMW; he really knows how to win a guy over doesn't he? I climb in and buckle my seat belt, feeling Roxas looking at me from the corner of his eye and I sigh, turning in my seat to face him slightly.

"Listen, Roxas, I've been a jerk since you asked me out and to be honest, I'm not really like that," I start and he raises a blonde brow, a smirk twisting his lips as he hums in thought.

"Oh really?" he asks and I nod my head, fixing the sleeve of my hoodie and trying to seem occupied though I know he knows I'm everything but.

"I'm actually…uh…friendly I guess? I don't fucking know, but you haven't been too nice either," I say in my defense and he just chuckles, stopping at a red light.

"That's because I'm not nice, never have been, never will be," he says and I feel my heart deflate at his words. I move my tongue around inside my mouth, trying to find something to say. But really, I wasn't expecting that answer, maybe a sorry or something but not that.

"So, what kind of movies do you like to watch?" I decide to ask, and I feel like such an idiot for some reason unbeknownst to me. Maybe it's because I'm acting so nervous, like some preacher's virgin daughter going on a date with some hot shot rebel boy. But for fuck sakes, I'm not a preacher's virgin daughter so why am I being so weird? I've never been on a date before, so maybe this is how I act when I have a crush on someone and we're alone or maybe it's because I really want him to like me. Fuck, I have no idea.

"Anything except Romantic Comedies, those things are so stupid," Roxas says as he merges into a different lane, I notice dully that traffic is pretty bad.

"Yeah, I've never liked them. They're all the same. I prefer action or something," I say with a shrug and Roxas looks at me oddly for a few minutes, I feel myself blushing and I look out the window with a scowl on my face. My plan to woo him is totally back firing and I feel my defensive walls slowly coming up, and I'm about to do a 180. Going from nice Axel to the prick everyone at school hates.

"You're being awfully civil tonight," he says and I turn to look at him, wasn't he listening when I told him I'm not a jerk? What a complete fuck head.

"Yeah, I know. The first fucking thing I said when I came in here was that I'm not a jerk. Weren't you listening?" I ask, my short temper already getting the better of me and Roxas throws his head back laughing.

"You have such a foul mouth, you know that Martinez?" he says and when he looks at me, he's still smiling a little and I feel myself melt in the seat.

"Don't call me Martinez, why can't you call me Axel?" I grumble crossing my arms over my chest and he looks at me, he twists his mouth up in thought but really it's not that hard of a damn question. Must be all the footballs to the head he's gotten over the years.

"Sorry, guess I don't have it memorized uh?" he asks, making a joke out of what I said when I first walked into the class mid semester in grade nine. God, how I regret saying that stupid, stupid catch phrase.

"Well…fuck you," I growl and I feel myself pouting, damn it, Axel Martinez does not pout.

"I like using Axel," he says ignoring my totally sour face, drawing out the L's and smirking at me when my eye twitches, "Only in a sexual context," he finishes and I frown. By the time this night is over I'm going to be wrinkled like a damn turtle's armpit.

"Don't be such a sour puss Martinez. If you want me to say your first name so bad…make me," he says, pulling into the theatre's parking lot, which is quite deserted might I add. I feel my heart start thudding painfully against my ribs and my stomach acids start bubbling with anxiety. This date suddenly got really sexually charged, really fast. He cuts the engine, but doesn't get out; instead he just stays seated there. I really don't know what to do, so I unbuckle my seat belt and go to exit but he stops me with a firm grip on my wrist. I feel my body tense at the touch, my wrists are sensitive.

"Come on, Martinez," with another gentle tug I'm almost pressed into the gear shift, "Make me moan your name," he purrs, pulling me towards him and pressing his lips against the shell of my ear. He tugs on my helix piercing with his teeth making my heart stop, then restart as if it's been injected with Adrenaline. I tug away from him with enough force to actually make him let me go, and he looks taken aback and there's a hint of anger in his big, blue eyes but that stupid smirk is still there.

"Roxas, we're in a parking lot…in your car," I say, my throat dry and my tongue feels heavy as I move it to talk. Roxas flicks a few blonde strands away from his face and looks at me.

"So what?" he asks and grabs my upper arm, pulling me back towards him and he nibbles on my ear lobe when I'm close enough. Damn him for knowing exactly where to touch, "You want me, so what's the problem?" I pull away and frown at him; did he really expect me to fuck him in his car, in a parking lot? I feel my anger start to boil in my blood as my face flushes over.

"What's the _problem_? Roxas you can't seriously expect me to fuck you in your car only after like…a week of dating. I don't know what you've heard but I'm not like that," I hiss and he seems to have a hard time believing me, his face shows that he doesn't trust a word I'm saying. I clench my fists at my side and glare at him, tugging my arm out of his grip; I unlock the door and climb out. I hear him come out just seconds after and he strides over to my side.

"Why the hell are you acting so prime and proper Martinez?" he hisses and it seems that I've finally broken his calm, I'm-so-damn-cool attitude because he looks genuinely upset. I feel my fist twitch and I know I'm going to punch him in the face if he keeps talking to me like this.

"I don't know what you heard_ Anderson_; but I'm not the type to just put out on the first date in the front seat of some damn car!" I shout and a couple that was walking by stares over. I lift my hand and send them the finger, bearing my teeth and looking just about ready to rip their heads off.

"_Well that's not what Kairi said,"_ he mumbles and I feel my entire body go cold then fire shoots through my veins. My hands shoot out and I grip his shoulders, flipping him around and slamming him into the side of his car. His eyes widen and he seems confused until he realizes that_, hey_, I just man handled him. He struggles against my grip but when I'm angry, I'm strong and I hold him against the car. To be honest, I'm struggling just as hard to keep him in place.

"What the fuck did that bitch say?" I hiss and for a second fear flashes in his eyes, but his face remains calm and he just looks up at me, stopping his struggle.

"Nothing, she just said I was dating a whore," he replies with a shrug and I feel my hands tingle all over, almost as if they are about to combust and shoot flames from my very finger tips.

"So you believe her?" I ask quietly and I don't know why it hurts so much that he believes Kairi over me, I should have known he would have though. I mean, look at the hierarchy, she's in his group and I'm way below. The word of a Lady has always been more valuable then the word of a cursed peasant, right?

"Do you like me Martinez?" Roxas asks suddenly, completely ignoring my question and I feel my face go completely slack. Oh man, did I fucking ever…but was I ready to tell him? He stares up at me, still pressed against his car and I just feel my heart start pounding and my entire body fills with this almost uncontrollable urge to kiss him which is weird considering how badly I wanted to deck him a few minutes ago.

"Yes," I whisper and drop my head on his shoulder, I don't know why but I feel like crying but before I have a chance to he's talking again.

"So you're not just dating me to help your friends through high school then?" he asks and I nod, clenching my eyes tightly because now he knows and he can either make or break me. "I don't understand you then…" he says and his voice sounds honestly confused, I pull away and look at him with a raised eyebrow and he sees my own confusion.

"Why won't you just fuck me if you like me, don't you want to?" He asks and I feel my eyes widen and I pull away from him, almost as if he punched me in the stomach. Does he think that just because I like him, I'd fucking give myself to him first chance I get? Is that how all his relationships have been? I think about it for a second, and yes I do want to be with him and whatever but like…relationships just don't work like that.

"You do, don't you?" he says with a smirk and now I find myself smacked into the side of his car and he's a lot closer to me then I was when I was holding him against the car, his grip is a lot more painful too I'm willing to bet.

"Well…half the school wants to, but I'm not going to be like one of those whores _Anderson_, and just throw myself on you at any given chance," I say and aim my glare somewhere over his shoulder. He's quiet for a few minutes; the silence is burning my skin and making me uncomfortable. I can tell he's thinking, probably planning something in that damn blonde head of his and suddenly he pulls away smirking, and there's an awful glint of something in his eyes that makes my stomach clench.

"Alright, I'll wait," he says simply and grabs my hand, lacing his fingers through mine and leading me towards the theater. My brain sort of twitches with all the confused thoughts rushing in at once, and all I can really think is,_ "Really, just like that?"_

He stops at the end of the line and looks up at the movies playing; there really isn't anything I'm dying to watch so I decide I'll let him choose. He seems to have other plans because he looks at me while pulling out his wallet with his free hand. He smiles in a way that could be considered charming and I raise an eyebrow at him.

"Why don't you choose the movie _babe_?" he says and I clench my teeth but nod my head and look at the list. Damn it, I was hoping on him choosing. I hate everything on the damn list to be honest, but I have decide on something. The line moves forward slowly and I unlace my fingers and reach for my own wallet, I feel Roxas' eyes basically burning a hole right through my head so I turn to look at him questioningly. He looks down at my wallet and then up at my face.

"This is a date isn't it? So shouldn't I pay?" he asks and I shake my head, before answering.

"Yes, this is a date but I'm going to pay," I say and he laughs gripping my arm and glaring at me with a smile on his face.

"No, I'm going to pay," he says but I turn and glare at him. I can feel a few people watching us already.

"Roxas, _sweetheart_, I'm paying…don't worry about it," I grind out and we both stop moving and glare at each other.

"No, baby, I'm paying…it's my treat,"

"No, Roxy-kins, I insist," I say and more and more people are lining up behind us, the people at the counter simply watching us.

"Axie-kins, my little button nosed sugar plum, stop being stubborn and let me pay!"

"Roxy, my little bite sized honey bunch, I asked you on the date, so it only makes sense if I pay!"

"Next?" the counter girl calls and I see Roxas' eyes shoot towards her. We both take off running towards the ticket booth and he shoves me out of the way, I grab onto his arms and we topple to the floor, Roxas landing right under me. I smirk at him from my position and he glares up at me, but I can see the smirk slowly twisting his lips.

The urge to kiss him suddenly takes over and I lean down, pressing my lips to his and the action seems to catch him off guard. I slowly slide my tongue along the seam of his lips and he opens his mouth which really surprises me because I thought he'd put up some resistance. The kiss deepens pretty quickly after that and he's tangling his fingers in my hair, holding my head in place when I try to pull away. I can hear a few people making comments, or shuffling past us but I'm too engrossed in the way his tongue feels against mine and the way his lips taste so good to pay any close attention.

I can feel him getting hard against my stomach and smirk, because he's totally forgotten about who's paying so I take the opportunity to shoot up and slam a bill on the counter, screaming out for two tickets to _White Out_ with stupid Kate Beckinsale because that's the only poster I can see, while Roxas is still on the floor panting and slowly getting out of that pre-sex daze. He gets to his feet with some difficulty, considering he's pitched a tent in his tight jeans and he stands beside me. I see the smirk on his face while I get the tickets and my change.

"You're an asshole Martinez," he says and I throw my head back, laughing loudly and throw an arm around his shoulders leading him to the concession stand.

"Well, you did call me a little button nosed sugar plum. Seriously, what the fuck?" I say, finding myself actually loosening up and feeling quite happy. Roxas looks exactly the same as usual, with his cocky smirk and cool exterior. The only thing off about him is that bulge in his pants, but that should go away soon enough.

"You called me some horrendous things too," he says as we stop in front of the guy running the stand. I look down at Roxas and smirk, asking him if he wants anything to eat. The look he gives me scares me because it's the look of a man with a plan. Then he flutters his eyelashes and thanks me a perfect imitation of a stereotypical gay man. It's even worse because he turns to the worker and cocks a hip out, ordering his stuff in that voice. Did he really have to ask like the girl, just because I'm paying?

"Oh well, uhm, let me see…" and I stand there watching him, trying so hard not to laugh. By the time he's done my eyes are bugging out of my head and the concession stand guy is scrambling around the stand filling out his monstrous order. I gawk at him and he stares up at me, smirking evilly.

"You wanted to pay, Axie, so…might as well pay the consequences too," he says laughing when the guy returns with half the fucking concession stand and reads out the price to me. I grumble angrily as I pay him and help Roxas with his tons of fucking junk food.

"Are you really going to eat all this?" I ask, watching Roxas rip the wrapper off an Ice cream bar as I hand the tickets to the dude and he tells us which theater number we have to go to. Roxas' reply is muffled by the ice cream he's crammed in his mouth.

"Ah neva geh tu ee junkth fuud" he says and I snort, trying to hold back my laughter. He glares at me, but smiles around the blue ice cream.

"The coach is going to castrate you," I say and try to balance a shit load of stuff on one arm because I want some popcorn.

"I'll just work it off later," he says clearly and I look at him, the ice cream is gone already and I widen my eyes before spotting a little blue on his bottom lip. I lean down and lick it off slowly, and he jerks his head away and I smirk.

"That's really good ice cream," I say as we squirm our way between the seats and find a good spot. We sit down and I hand him all the food his orders and his eyes shine with a happiness I'd never seen in them.

By the time the previews are done, he's halfway through his mountain of food and still going. For some reason I find his love of food really adorable, and I find myself smiling just watching him instead of the movie.

**~*~**

"Ugh, I feel pregnant," Roxas says as we walk back towards his car, I chuckle and shake my head, waiting for him to climb in and unlock the door. When he does I slide in and buckle my seat belt, watching Roxas start the car with a little bulge under his shirt. His stomach sticking out slightly from all the food he ingested.

"You _look_ pregnant," I snicker and he shoots me a look before staring down at his stomach and frowning, he reverses and pulls out of the parking lot, merging into the road that has a lot less traffic then before.

"It shouldn't be too hard to work off," he says thoughtfully, stopping at a red light and I lean my head against the window feeling content for the first time in a long while.

"We've been getting along pretty good," I whisper, feeling my eyes droop slightly and Roxas nudges my shoulder, making me open them a little wider.

"We have, haven't we?" he says and turns down a street that should take me home, I nod against the window. "Don't fall asleep and drool all over the interior," he grumbles and I fake snore, making loud, gross slurping sounds and he punches my shoulder, chuckling.

"You're alright Martinez," he says and stops in front of my building. I smile at him, and he looks surprised because I think this is the first time I've ever genuinely smiled for him. Wait…smiled…_for_ him?

"Good night Rox," I say leaning over and kissing him softly, I pull away and climb out of the car. "I had fun," I say before smiling again and walking away. I look back and notice he's still sitting there, looking shell shocked and I can't tell if that's a hint of a troubled look surfacing or not.

I get upstairs and Reno's sleeping on Rude, while the android pretends to sleep. I tip-toe past them and into my room with a smile still on my face, once in bed, I feel my phone vibrate and I flip it open seeing a new message.

"_I had a good time too, Axel"_

_

* * *

_

**A/N: **Awwww, Roxas is being sweet 8D  
Lolol, let's hope it lasts...for Axel's sake!  
Annnnnnnnnnd Axel aint such a jerk after all hahaha!

Thanks for reading, and review if you'd like too (:


	7. You Filthy Liar

**Chapter Seven: You filthy Liar**

I hate social scenes, I hate parties and most of all I hate people. But seriously, I really hate people, like, despise them. I mean, if the human race was threatened by killer robots, well…power to the fucking robots. I'd probably take advantage and slay a few bastards myself before the robots decided to kill me.

Right now, I'm sitting by a punch bowl that's been spiked by almost everyone at this stupid party so it's really not punch anymore, but a cocktail of vodkas and rums. The pink colour that it originally began with even faded away to a weird maroon colour. I don't drink, so all I have in my hand is a cup of fucking soda and I hate soda. Roxas is currently being tossed around between bimbos, all of them telling him how fucking sexy he is. How I know? Well, remember my lip reading skills? Yeah, that's how. Am I jealous? No…okay yes, I am fucking furious.

I hate parties, did I mention that before? I'm sure I did. I don't know what possessed me to come to this stupid shindig (probably my growing obsession for a little blonde). I see Demyx over by the DJ just talking and gushing at the sound system that if placed in my apartment, it would easily cover the entire surface area of the place. Naminé is actually talking with Larxene and the girl seems to be humane, at least towards my tiny blonde friend, I mean, she even has her arm around the girl (there goes scheming with Zexy). Zexion is standing right beside Demyx, his face is the perfect image of nonchalance but I know he's really terrified. They are all enjoying themselves more then me and it really makes me wonder if I'm the only true freak in our group. But then I remember that they were outcasts way before I stumbled into that stupid hell hole we the people call high school.

"Hey there Martinez," someone slurs from my right and I turn with a withering glare on my face. It's this nasty jerk who hangs around Roxas all the time, one of the many that heckles me during P.E. I decide it's best to simply ignore the intoxicated idiot and continue on with my brooding. That is until he places a hand on my shoulder and twists me so that I'm facing him again. "I'm talking to you, you deaf or something?" he says, his breath is probably enough to get me tipsy.

"Yeah, or something…" I say and shrug his huge, clammy hand off. I really just want to go home, but I don't know what's stopping me. That huge hand comes back, only this time it's wrapping around my waist and tugging me towards the big Neanderthal. I raise my arms and try to shove him off me but let's face it, how strong can a guy who lives off Mr. Noodle and milk be? All those milk advertisements are false. I squirm and his breath is washing over my face, how much has he had to drink?

"Under this light, you kinda look like a chick," he slurs and I blink furiously, okay what am I supposed to say to that? Does that even count as a pick up line? I decide not to answer and struggle more against his hold as that warm hand slides down my back. "Oh come on Martinez, I know you want some," he says and I make the most disgusted face I could possibly conjure without looking animated.

"What!?" I shout and if the music wasn't so loud, people in China probably would have heard me.

"Rumor has it that you want some from the entire football team," he says and goes to slobber my neck like my Aunt's dog Chico used to when I would visit. It's fucking repulsive.

I see a tiny blonde head of hair shove his way through the crowd and suddenly I'm pulled backwards and shoved behind Roxas' back. The small blonde is standing in front of me in an offensive position and looks about ready to tear the guy in front of us a new one. I try and stop the way my heart hammers against my rib cage but I can't because Roxas looks so furious and I'm hoping that it's because that buffoon was touching me. The drunken football player looks confused at first until he sees his team captain in front of him, he gives Roxas a sloppy smile and shrugs his shoulders.

"He's mine," Roxas barks angrily and the huge male looks down before shrugging again and walking away.

Roxas then turns around and finds me wiping at my neck with the back of my sleeve. That disgusting pig actually got spit all over my neck, which is so gross I can't even word how nasty it is properly. Roxas grabs at my wrist and drags me away from the huge crowd, over the other crowd of people at the stair case and past another crowd of people that are filling a hallway. Soon I'm pushed into a bedroom and I look around, realizing it's probably a guest room. Roxas look a little drunk as he saunters over to me and pushes me back onto the bed. My eyes are huge and my mouth is drying quickly as he crawls on top of me and settles in between my legs.

"I've been wanting to get you all alone this entire party," he breathes and his hands are so quick, I barley notice when he takes my belt off. I'm blinking owlishly in the dark and I don't really know what to say but Roxas doesn't seem to be too keen on talking because he's covering my mouth with his lips and he tastes a little too strongly of alcohol.

I lift my arms and place my hands on his chest, going to push him away but he stops me and pins my hands over my head a lot like he did that day in the exercise room only this time he laces our fingers together and holds my hands in place. I'm finding it harder and harder to find reasons to object to him as he trails kisses over the fading hickey and leaves a trail of cooling saliva where that idiot had tried to kiss but only succeeded in wetting half my neck.

"You're mine, don't know who that idiot thinks he is," Roxas mumbles against my neck, his tongue drawing little designs on my skin and he nips softly at my pulse before pulling away and attacking my lips again.

His tongue doesn't even wait; it's pressing past my lips and diving into my mouth caressing everything it can reach. I feel myself getting hard against Roxas and he grinds his hips down into mine, I pull away just as a moan breaks past my lips and Roxas groans before letting go of one of my hands to use his free hand to unbutton my pants.

"R-Roxas…w-wait," I breathe and his hand stops just past the waist line of my boxers, his cool finger tips are resting just a fraction of an inch away from coarse red hair. He looks at me, and his blue eyes are dark but that's probably because there's absolutely no light in the room and I feel myself blushing even worse.

"What is it Axel?" Roxas says quietly and I think that's what did it. He said my name and that's what broke my resolve.

I extend my neck and catch his lips in a heated kiss, he takes this as the go-ahead and slides his hand all the way into my boxers, fingers wrapping around my erection and squeezing. I moan and arch off the bed, not wanting that talented hand to leave but it does. I hear him unbutton his jeans and he tosses a condom wrapper onto my chest. I stare down at it and I'm not quite sure what to do, he groans and tugs my jeans down until they're hanging around my ankles not bothering to take them off all the way as he rips the condom open and hands it to me. He pulls away and stands on his knees in front of me. This is the first time I've actually see his _you know_, pride and joy.

"Put it on me, Axel," he says sensually and I look up at him, my throat clenches as I place the rubber against the tip of his erection with shaking fingers. I have no idea why I was doing this, I mean, I've only had sex once in my entire life and that was rape so shouldn't I be terrified?

The long moan he lets out as I finish snapping the thing on clears my mind of all thought and soon he's on me again, his hands touching everything and I can barley concentrate on just one feeling because there is just too many. He brings a hand up to my face and makes me suck on his fingers, I wrap my tongue around them giving each finger a nice wet coat and he pulls them away and shoves one inside me. I hiss out in pain but he doesn't stop, instead he adds another one and I feel tears welling in my eyes as he starts wriggling them around. I'm hoping he'll wait but he doesn't, and just shoves a third finger in, scissoring all three of them and making me whimper because it just hurts so much. Before the pain fades he's pulling the fingers out and pushing his member in and if I thought the pain before was bad, I was sorely mistaken.

It feels like I'm being ripped in half. But I suck it up because I don't want to see weak in front of Roxas Anderson. I grip his shoulders as he starts thrusting in and out of me, the tears that had welled up in my eyes slip out and slide into my hair. I think he sees them because he slows down and his free hand wipes the salty water away.

"S-shit…am I hurting you?" he asks, his voice sounding strained as he stills his movements. The sharp pain is now a dull throb and I shake my head, sending him a grin.

"Since when do you care?" I ask and he rolls his eyes, leaning down and kissing me softly. It catches me completely off guard because it's the softest he's ever kissed me before.

"Since now," he groans and I roll my hips up, making my eyes roll into the back of my head with the amazing sensation it sends right through me. Roxas moans loud and starts moving again.

_Maybe_, I think, _maybe I'm doing this for him to like me_. I know it's the wrong thing to do and I shouldn't but I can't help it because I just want him to like me so much it hurts.

I kick one leg free from my pants and wrap my legs around his waist trying to meet each of his thrusts, my muscles contracting and squeezing him as he pushes in and pulls out.

"Uhnn, fuck Axel" he groans, a light sheen of sweat covering his face and I can feel the sweat collecting on my own body. I don't know how long this pattern goes on for but I know when it's coming to an end because I feel like my body is burning up and with each thrust my entire frame trembles.

"A-Ah Ro-Roxas…f-fuck I'm…" and before I finish that sentence I release my load on both our shirts, mentally cursing my black sweater.

Roxas leans down and buries his face in my neck, still thrusting like a crazed animal then he bites down on my shoulder hard enough the tear the skin and groans as he finishes. He pulls away and we're both panting. He stares into my eyes and a strange emotion is swirling around his blue depths.

"Axel…" but he can't finish whatever he's going to say because half the school's populace floods into the room. They all start hollering and cat calling and Roxas jumps away from me, I sputter as I try and shove my shoe clad foot back into my jeans and fix my clothing. It's too late though because everyone's already seen me and Roxas is looking at me like he doesn't know what to say. I glare at him angrily because I cannot believe what's happening. This was all a fucking set up wasn't it?

The Silver Haired Douche Bag (as I so lovingly dubbed him) appears at the front of the crowd, clapping his hands and laughing as if he's just seen the greatest live comedy act of his life.

"Well done Roxas, I thought you were gonna back out…what with the way you were talking yesterday but seems like you didn't after all!" Riku says and almost every one of Roxas' friends is laughing. I finish pulling my jeans up and stand shakily, pain shoots through my entire body and the way I wince just makes them all laugh even more.

"Did you tie him up like I told you?" Kairi says and sends me a poisonous look, my eyes widen and Roxas is just silent as everyone laughs at me. I turn to look at him and I try and ignore the way my chest feels, I know what that is though. It's my fucking heart breaking but I ignore it and instead I glare at him.

"I fucking hate you Anderson," I hiss and Roxas' looks at me, his eyes still unreadable and he goes to open his mouth but Riku cuts him off again.

"Oh feisty isn't he Roxas? Man it was hilarious! We all heard him whimpering like a baby…and…Oh fucking gross, is that cum on his shirt?" everyone starts laughing again and I look down and realize that yes that is fucking cum on my shirt. I look over at Roxas with nothing in my eyes but pain and a silent question.

_Why, why did you have to fucking hurt me like this?_

I shove past the few people at the door and start sprinting towards the exit, ignoring the horrible pain shooting through my entire body. I also ignore the call of my name that comes from the room I'm running from.

I crash into Demyx on my way out and he looks at me before screaming out for Naminé to run over and the girl appears behind us followed by Larxene and Zexion. They all lead my outside and into someone's car but I don't really pay attention to who's it is.

"Axel…w-what happened?" Naminé asks quietly and I look up at her no longer being able to hold back my tears. I start bawling like a fucking faggot and I hate myself for it. I hate myself so much because I wish I wouldn't have let him hurt me. I shouldn't have fooled myself into believing that someone could actually like me.

"He did it, didn't he?" Larxene says and I'm surprised to see it's her who's driving the car. I look up at her with wide eyes and she looks at me through the rear view.

"They all dared Roxas to date then fuck you at the party. They were actually supposed to film it," she says and Naminé looks horrified and Demyx just hugs me tighter against him. "Those fuckers have some strange forms of entertainment, I'll give them that," Larxene continues as she speeds down the almost empty streets. Naminé whispers my address to her quietly and the rest of the drive is done in silence. I limp out of the car and all the way to my apartment, Demyx and Zexion follow me while Naminé and Larxene wait in the car. I unlock the door and Reno races over with a smile on his face that slowly melts away into a deep down.

"What happened yo?" he asks and I brush past him and into me room, locking the door and ignoring the way he knocks persistently against the wood asking me to come out. I hear Demyx walk over and silently ask him to give me some space. It's the first time I hear Demyx say something smart.

I start smacking my forehead into the wall beside my door over and over, a head ache starting to slowly sink it's nails into my brain but I don't stop. I'm such an idiot, I cannot believe I actually fell for it.

This kind of thing only happens in movies, I mean, when would a jock who's got everything going for him find any interest in a freak like me?

_Never._

That type of thing only happens in Nicholas Sparks's books or something and my life was definitely not a romance novel. It was so far from it.

I try and ignore the ache in my chest that actually hurts more then everything combined, it's the ache I feel that let's me know that I've actually been hurt and I can't just brush it off and say I don't care because I'm not really too keen on lying to myself.

Roxas Anderson broke my heart and fuck, I was really starting to fall for him too.

I hear my cell phone buzz and I crawl over to is, flipping it open and seeing that I had a new message. I open it and realize that it's from Roxas.

'_Axel …let me explain' _

I glare at the tiny screen before hitting reply, my hand shaking as I type in the short message.

'_No, leave me alone'_

I wait for him to message me back and he does, I don't know why my stomach flips when my phone vibrates but it does.

'_I don't want to, I'm coming over…whether you like it or not. Bye'_

I know that no matter what I say, he'll come and talk to me so I simply whip my phone at the wall and scream my throat raw. Reno is knocking at the door, threatening to break it down but I ignore him and start smacking my face into the floor waiting for Roxas to arrive.

I fucking hate my life.

* * *

**A/N:** Who wants Axel to forgive Roxas?  
Who wants Axel to punch him in the face?  
Who wants both?


	8. No Forgiveness, No Mercy, Rubber Chicken

**Chapter Eight: No Forgiveness, No Mercy, Rubber Chicken**

"Buy flamethrower, then go over unexpectedly, use aforementioned flamethrower to burn him," I read off the paper and shake my head, buying a flamethrower could cost too much, plus Reno would get suspicious. I scratch that off my list, which already has like 50 scratches. I won't go through all them again but they range from Goldfish daggers to Conway Twitty CD's and NyQuil.

If you're wondering what I'm doing, I'm writing down plans. Plans on how to kill that bitch ass mother fucking douche bag who hurt me. I mean, I'm not 12 years old anymore. I'm not going to let some bastard hurt me; I'm going to have my revenge.

Right, so maybe I'm being unrealistic with the flamethrowers, but the Conway Twitty plan was pretty good, if I do say so myself. I sigh as I look out the window, I'm not as furious as I was when I got home, but that tends to happen to me. I get angry real quick, but it dies off just as fast. Like a firecracker, they come out with this huge bang, then slowly they fade away into nothing but ashes and a burnt out shell. I'm not burnt out, but I'm pretty apathetic. I mean, if I start thinking about it again it'll start to hurt, so I push it in the back of my mind where I keep memories of razors and my dad and uncle. It's how I stay sane, I guess.

I look out my window, it's getting later and later and Roxas doesn't seem to be coming. I crush the disappointment as fast as it comes and poke at the blood stains on my throw rug. I kind of made my nose bleed while smashing my face into the floor, which now I'll admit wasn't very smart but what can you do. I feel blackness clouding my vision and my head feels 20 pounds too heavy so I rest it on the cool floor, fuck am I ever sleepy.

I wake up with my head in someone's lap as they run their fingers softly through my hair, I purr contently and nuzzle into said mystery person's lap until I remember that last I checked, I had passed out on my fucking floor. I shoot up and find Roxas sitting there with his back pressed against my bed. I glare at him and scoot away on my ass.

"Axel…" I cut him off by whipping the thing I had nearest to me, which happened to be a shoe, but the lucky bastard has reflexes like a cat and dodges it.

"Axel…listen," but I don't want to listen so I find something else, a book, and chuck it at his head. He isn't so lucky this time and the edge of the book nicks the side of his forehead. He curses and by the time he looks up I'm throwing something else. It's another book, and I vaguely wonder when I got all these damn books in my room.

He can't be here, not when I've already pushed all the memories away. He's just gonna dig them all out and leave a mess.

"Axel, _please_!" Roxas shouts covering his head from the assault and I stop because he just said please. I wonder if he's ever even used the word before and he looks up at me, his blue eyes shinning with hope but my fingers tighten around the CD case I just found and he looks down at it before shaking his head in a silent plea for me to not throw it at him.

"Get out of my room," I hiss, he looks at me and doesn't move. "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM!" I scream but it comes out more like a raspy whisper since my voice is still shot from all the screaming I did earlier. I stand up and tower over him, but he doesn't move. I'm vaguely reminded of all those biology classes where the teacher would tell us about certain animals. The larger one would make it known to the smaller that it was the leader by showing its size. I guess that's what I'm doing here because Roxas may rule the fucking school but in my room, it's my fucking rules. But he isn't backing down like he is supposed to. Does he know nothing about alpha males?

"I'm not leaving until you let me…what's this?" Roxas says, bending down and reaching over to my pile of lined paper. He picks them up and I lunge at him. He cannot know my evil plans.

"No! Leave that!" I whine, he places a hand on my face and holds me away at arm's length.

"Conway Twitty?" he says, turning to look at me with a cocked brow and I feel myself blushing behind his hand. I'm kind of just kneeling there, after giving up the struggle and looking retarded. He moves his hand and looks at me head on, then looks at the paper again.

"Make Zexion conjure a plan?" he says and chuckles, I finally get fed up and snatch the papers away ripping them up into funfetti and whipping them across the room, now if you've ever tried whipping paper shreds you'll know how stupid I just looked.

"I still want you to get out of my room," I say quietly because my big, loud, booming voice is gone until further notice.

"Axel, please, just let me explain to you…" he says and I hear him kneel down in front of me, my head shoots up and I glare at him making him freeze in mid knee-step.

"I don't want to hear you, I don't even want to see you anymore," I say and feel my tear ducts slowly filling to the point of explosion. It angers me how I can never tell what Roxas is feeling, his big blue eyes should be so expressive yet they aren't. He hides things so well, I sometimes wonder if he's got a traumatic past or something but I doubt it.

"Fuck Martinez, common," he says after a pause and I look at him with wide eyes, how can you ask someone to listen to you when you're loosing patience with said person? That is not going to win forgiveness.

"No. Now, I want you to get up and leave my room, after you leave my room I want you to go home, when you get home I want you to do anything in your power to erase me from your memories. I want you to go back to acting as if I don't exist," I say and Roxas just looks at me like he's lost.

"But I can't," Roxas says and he's in front of me in two seconds flat looking up at me with those blue eyes that make my knees weak, or at least they did until he fucking ripped my heart right out. There's a part of me that wants to forgive and forget, that wants to go back to those rough kisses and relive that movie date, but the stronger part of me wants me to punch him in the face.

So I do. I punch him right in the face, he stumbles backwards and cups his cheek. My knuckles ache telling me it was a good hit.

"Okay, I deserve that," he says, touching the no doubt sore area with the pads of his fingers. "Fuck Martinez, you pack a punch in those twiggy arms," he mutters, rubbing a little more vigorously at the spot.

I can't explain to you how fucking good it feels to punch Roxas Anderson in the face. I should go down in the Guinness Book of World Records, because I doubt anyone else has ever hit Roxas fucking Anderson in the _face_.

"Axel just hear me out okay? I was going to go through with the plan," he starts and takes a small step towards me, I realize that if I want him to get the hell out of my house, I'll just have to listen to his steaming pile of bullshit. "I was going to do it; they even wanted to take pictures to post around the school after cropping me out. I thought you deserved it…that's why I wanted to go along with it. They told me you did it to people all the time and you're just such an arrogant idiot I thought it was true…but fuck Axel, you proved me wrong with every encounter…you were just too…have you ever even dated anyone before?"

I feel my cheeks start to burn and I look away, biting my bottom lip furiously. "Who made you the judge of what I deserve and what I don't?" I whisper and I hear the floorboards under Roxas creak as he shifts his weight.

"No one…it's just…Kairi painted this horrible picture of you to us…everyone hates you because all the things she's said. So my group decided to do a little justice or whatever they called it," Roxas says and I look at him, I think he can see how furious I am.

"Kairi? Why would you listen to her?" I hiss and he shrugs pathetically, he finally looks out of his element, he looks awkward and probably a little afraid.

"She's your sister, we thought she knew you," Roxas says and I think that's what makes me snap because I'm charging at him and slamming his back hard against the wall, he makes a soft grunt sound but other then that seems perfectly unaffected by it.

"Kairi knows nothing about me…she's a bitch who wants to get back at me for something I didn't do, so before you go and believe the shit people spew out of their mouths, make sure you get your shit straight Anderson. Next time you go and want to do your share of justice, you better fucking make sure you aren't fucking someone who's as fucked as I am. Make damn sure," I seethe and I realize our faces are inches apart, I rip away from him and he just stays there against the wall, unsure of what to do or say.

"What do you mean?" he finally asks, and I decide I'm going to tell him about my past, maybe I tell him just to make him feel like shit. I don't know why, but I tell him.

I roll my sleeves up and show him my wrists; all the marred flesh, the bumps and grooves all along the pale skin of my forearm. Roxas looks stunned into silence, so I continue with a sick little smile on my face "You see these?" here I point at the scars that go all around, the rope burns that will forever remind me of _them_, Roxas nods silently. "Guess who did it?" I question and Roxas looks up at me, blinking in confusion. I sigh and run my fingers over the pastel pink skin, "My father and my uncle did it. This is the scar the rope they used to tie me to my headboard left_. Why_ did they tie me to a _headboard_? Let me tell you. To fucking _rape_me," I say, hatred dripping off ever consonant and vowel. Roxas makes a pained sound in his throat and I look up at him, he looks like he's about to be sick and his eyes are round like dinner plates.

"Want to know something else fucked up?" I don't wait long enough to see if he nods or shakes his head. "My first time, I mean, the _real_ time, when I did it voluntarily was with you," I look at him and he looks pale, like he's about to pass out so I roll my sleeves down and turn away, moving further away from him.

"Now I want you to get the fuck out, get out of my house…get out of my life," I whisper and he's done it. He's unburied everything and the weight of it all is going to fucking crush me if he doesn't leave right now.

"Axel…I can't," he says quietly and for the first time there's emotion in his voice and it sounds kind of like hurt or something, I can't really tell because it's barely there.

"Why? Why can't you? No one at school needs to know, let them all think you did some courageous act. I won't tell anyone the truth Roxas, if that's what you're worried about. I won't tell anyone that I'm not really this big bitchy whore, no one would believe me anyway so you have nothing to worry about," I feel myself choking up because I know that once Roxas walks out the door, it's over and done with forever. It hurts; it hurts because despite everything I _still_ fucking like him a lot.

"No Axel, that's not the reason. I can't leave because…fuck…because well, oh for fuck sakes," he shifts and looks around my room, scratching at the back of his blonde messy hair nervously. Wait, is he actually nervous? Roxas Anderson…_nervous_? Fuck this has got to be good.

"I did it because I wanted to. When I saw that fucker on you…I knew, that _fuck_, I wanted you...I fucking got _jealous_... I wasn't planning on them walking into the room; I took us to a different room all together. I wanted to, but I didn't want them to come in," Roxas finishes and the floorboards creak under his feet with every step he takes closer to me. I don't move, I'm running out of corners to hide in.

"Fuck Martinez, I'm starting to like you," he whispers when he's right behind me, he wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me against him. It's a little awkward because I'm so much taller and I can feel his cheek press in between my shoulder blades as he holds me close to him. It's weird how I don't want to pull away…it's weird that he's _hugging_ me.

"Stop Roxas," I say quietly and he just pulls away slowly, I turn and look at him, my eyes filling with tears and I don't know why.

"I'm not going to forgive you so easily," I say and he cups my cheek, I don't find the strength to pull away.

"I know, but…maybe you can let me prove to you that I'm serious? That I didn't mean to hurt you, that I'm starting to like you," Fuck, is he going to be an English major? Because he has such a way with words. I'm wondering why I'm not snapping at him and…oh wait, I already did that. See, I'm like a fire cracker and he seems to know that I'm burnt out now and that I won't attack him because now he's getting closer, now he's talking more. Am I really that easy to read?

I mull everything over in my head; Roxas wants to prove to me how badly he likes me or whatever? I guess I should find out just how badly he wants it.

"How badly do you want to prove it?" I ask and look at him; he moves his hand from my cheek and shoves it in his pocket shrugging.

"Bad, I guess. I don't want you to hate me," he says and looks around my room, well, he obviously knows that for me not to hate him for doing something this extreme it's going to take a lot. He knows what he's getting in to.

"It won't be easy…making me not hate you," I say and he nods his head solemnly, I sigh and look up at the ceiling. This is actually a good chance to get my revenge on him. I'll have to ask Zexion to help me plan things to make Roxas' life a living hell.

"Fine Roxas, I'll give you a chance to show me you mean everything you said. Just one chance though. I still hate you until further notice. Oh and this doesn't mean I've forgiven you either," I say and he nods again but there's a smile on his face. Again, that genuine smile and I feel my insides turn to mush.

"Can I kiss you?" he asks and I feel myself leaning down, then I mentally slap myself and turn away from him.

"Fuck no, it wont be that easy," I growl and grab his wrist, dragging him out of my room and into the hall.

"It was worth a try," he says teasingly and I ignore the way my face muscles want to pull into a smile.

Out here in the hallway is when I hear it, a strange squeaking sound that sounds like a dog's rubber toy. Roxas eyes me curiously when I look back at him and I raise a brow at him before slowly continuing down the hall towards the living room.

Something's you can just never un-see. Like my brother straddling Rude's waist and beating him with a rubber chicken. Rude is actually laughing but my brother is frowning, yet I can see in his eyes that he's really not mad.

"You asshole! I told you not to eat the chocolate mousse in the fridge yo! It was mine! My chocolate mousse!" where he got the rubber chicken, I will never know because we don't have a dog and that is a squeak toy. They don't even notice us as we pass by and Roxas looks extremely disturbed, he's probably never seen anything like this with his prim and proper family. I push him out the door when we get to it and he looks at me, I glare at him and start closing the door.

"Get used to this treatment. I trusted you once and showed you who I was, and look what you did to me," I say and close the door. Reno raises his head over the backrest of the couch like a meercat and his eyes go huge when he sees me.

"You're out of your room yo!" he screams and chucks the rubber chicken half way across the apartment. He bounds over and wraps his arms around me, spinning me around like a freaking ragdoll and I just let him. It feels good to be hugged and comforted though Reno is kind of retarded with the whole soothing thing.

"I thought you were having another…thing or something. I was gonna call Aerith but I didn't and so I didn't know what to do," he says once he puts me down and I stare up at him. He's a tall mother fucker I swear, I mean, I'm really tall and he's still taller.

"So you beat Rude with a rubber chicken?" I say, chuckling softly and pushing every one of my problems into the back of my mind. I don't want to worry Reno; he has enough on his plate with bills, his work and the shit Kairi and I pull already.

"No…are you alright?" he asks and I nod, sending him a smile as I peel his arms off me.

I walk into the kitchen and take out some chocolate milk. If there is anything I need at this moment, it's god damned chocolate milk. I haven't had some in so long; I think I'm suffering from withdrawals.

"You need to start drinking white milk," Reno says and I send him a look filled with viciousness, he raises his arms laughing

"Sorry, sorry!" he says and sends me a smile as he turns to leave, "and Axel, if you ever need anything…I'm only in the room next to the laundry closet yo," he says and leaves. I snort which in turn brings milk up to my nose.

Damn it, I had been doing so well too.

* * *

**A/N:** And what would Nose Milk be without well...nose milk?

Axel's(Zexion's) going to plan revenge, but will he be able to go through with it?  
What do you guys think?

Thanks for reading!


	9. Ass Virginity

**Chapter Nine: Ass Virginity and The Beginings of Revenge**

I came to school with a mission, or well two missions. One, I had to find Zexion and two, get him to help me make a plan for revenge. We could forget about helping Naminé win Larxene because the little blonde obviously didn't need any help. I'm just judging by what I saw at the end of the party though, it'll all come out into the open today. I see Zexion sitting patiently at Demyx's side while the dirty blonde idiot flirts his way into oblivion with the new student who's only been here for like a week, and already he's been admitted into Roxas' social clique. The idiot probably doesn't know that talking to Demyx will make him a freaking loser.

"Hey, Zexion, Demyx," I say waving at them and Zexion stands up looking relieved that I've arrived. The idiot (I don't know his name) looks at me and smirks. The reason behind his eye patch is still a mystery and by the looks of it, he wants to keep it that way.

"Hey, hey, hey, look who it is!" he says and I raise a brow at him, hiding the extreme discomfort I'm feeling pretty well. He makes me feel…gross on the inside. I can't explain it properly, his smirk is just creepy.

"You're pretty famous around here," he says and Demyx's eyes go wide when he pulls out a piece of printer paper and shows it to us. It's the picture Roxas took of me against the brick wall behind the school, the one where I look like I belong on the cover of a porn video. What the picture says, I'd rather not repeat. I rip it out of his hand and tear it to shreds. He looks at me kind of shocked and smirks.

"To answer the question, I totally would," he says and I see red. I hear Demyx yelling at me to stop, but I tell him to shut the fuck up. I get off of the loser and glare at Demyx; he glares right back at me.

"You didn't have to hit him like that! You're gonna get fucking expelled…look at his face!" he shouts and I spit on the barley conscious boy on the floor, there's already a crowd and I leer at Demyx.

"It looks better," I say and stalk off into the school to find that fucking bastard, ripping those pictures off the walls as I go along. Some even got creative with Photoshop, fucking adding cum or something onto the picture. The bastards even did a good job.

"Anderson!" I shout, spotting Roxas sitting at the usual lunch table, I don't know why some people hang out in the cafeteria before school. It smells like shit so why spend more time then necessary in the damned place.

His blonde head shoots up and all his friends spot me. Wait, why was he holding his head down like that? I ignore that thought as his friends start snickering as I walk over. That silver haired douche spots all the papers in my hand. He gets up and meets me half way to the table, a challenging air all around him when he stops in front of me.

"You just crawl back for more?" he asks and cocks his head to the side flicking his hair away from his face. I growl deep in my throat and throw the papers at him; actually succeeding and making him look angry for once instead of smug.

"Wow, Kairi was right. You are a whore," he says and everyone starts laughing. I feel my chest start heaving and my scars burn as I lunge right for his throat, fingers spread like claws and eyes set to kill. I tackle him to the floor and we end up tangled in long limbs. I finally manage to pin him under me and I punch him right in the face but it does little to him. He can take a damn hit.

"Kairi told us everything Martinez, you're one sick fucker," he continues and I stop my fist mid swing and I stare down at him. "Hitting me won't make it better," he leers.

"What did she tell you?" I ask quietly and he smirks at me, a trickle of blood collecting in the corner of his lips.

"How you tried to seduce your own dad and uncle, but they didn't want you so you sent them to prison claiming they raped you. How sick do you have to be?" he asks and I can see the disgust in his face, I jump off him and stare wide eyed at the silver haired teen. He gets up and dusts himself off as if nothing happened; I notice briefly that Larxene isn't at the table.

"You're kind of heartless, making Kairi suffer. You deserve this and worse you know," he continues and I can't say anything. Sora looks like he's about to be sick. "Maybe they should have raped you."

I can't breathe.

"Shut the fuck up Riku," I stare with wide, glassy eyes as Roxas stands from the table and walks over to us. The cafeteria goes as silent as a morgue and everyone is watching the blonde with shock.

"What?" Riku asks dumbly and Roxas just looks at him like he's a worthless piece of shit, and he kind of is.

"I said shut your mouth, and you'll do it. Leave Martinez alone," Roxas says, his tone left no room for argument and Riku looks like a whipped dog, running with his tail between his legs.

"Why do you care about that bitch's suffering anyways?" Roxas asks, cocking his brow up and watching as Riku fidgets under his gaze. Finally Riku must realize he looks helpless and stupid and stops, straightening his spine and towering over Roxas but the blonde holds his ground.

"She's a friend," Riku says and Kairi shoots up from the table looking pissed off for all she's worth. She runs right up to Riku and slaps him so hard I think he's going to have her hand tattooed on his cheek.

"That's not what you said a few nights ago!" she screams and runs out of the cafeteria, Sora looks at Riku and the silver haired boy looks cornered because Roxas looks like he's about to castrate him. This is a lot of fucking drama, I don't know when I'm gonna be able to bitch at Roxas for these pictures. I'm sort of glad all the attention isn't on me though.

"You fucked her?" Sora says suddenly and I burst out laughing, everyone looks at me and Roxas raises a brow so high it almost disappears into his hairline. What? I can't help it. I mean, look at Sora and picture him saying that, it's just funny.

"I'm sorry, that was so blunt, carry on," I say holding back a few giggles and Roxas starts chuckling a little too. Sora looks at us like he's about to bash our faces together, we shut up and stare at him silently.

"Did you Riku?" Sora asks and Riku shakes his head but it's a half shake, half nod. "Well, did you?"

"Look, I was drunk…I didn't know what I was doing," Riku says slowly inching closer to Sora and the small brunette slaps Riku hard, only it's on his other cheek. I hear Roxas snort and I look over at him as he tries (and fails) to hide his laughter behind his hand.

"You knew enough to fuck her," Sora shouts and Riku shakes his head, claiming he's in love with the tiny Anderson but Sora smacks him again, screams that it's over and storms out of the cafeteria with Riku running after him.

"Don't think I forgot what I came here for originally," I hiss and grab Roxas by the wrist. He kind of struggles, I feel all the eyes on us and there's people laughing without even trying to hide it. I know they are all laughing at me; they all think Roxas used me or whatever story they have. It's like broken fucking telephone with the gossip at school. I just ignore the whistling and the comments as I drag Roxas out into an empty hall.

"What the fuck are these?" I hiss and Roxas stares at the papers crumpled in my hands, he takes them and flattens them out.

"Sexy pictures of you?" he says and looks up at me through his bangs, I feel a blush creeping onto my cheeks and I look away before he sees it.

"No, seriously. How do they have that picture?"

"I gave it to Riku, like long ago…it's a good picture you gotta admit," he says with a smirk and I feel like making him eat the paper, using excessive force.

"Can you take anything seriously?" I hiss and he chuckles, folding the paper and putting it in his back pocket before shrugging. Why didn't he throw it out?

"Can you take a joke?" he shoots back and I choke on air, eyes going wide and lips scrunching together tightly.

"You call that a joke? That's a pretty fucked up joke!" I shout and he raises his hands, shaking his head and tilting it to the side cutely.

"Look, I'll go around the school and make sure they are all taken down and burnt okay babe? Will that make you happy?" he says and smirks when I blush, glaring at him and folding my arms over my chest.

"It would please me yes…and don't call me babe," I grumble and he chuckles, closing the space between us and trapping me against the wall. I do not like where this is going.

"Oh, I'd like to please you," he breathes against my neck, his hands rubbing the upper parts of my arms and trying to get me to uncross them but I hold them tight, ignoring the way my skin tingles horribly wherever his breath touches.

"Get off me Anderson!" I growl and shove him away, he rubs at the spot on his chest where my hand made contact and looks at me, pouting.

"Alright, alright…you're still mad," he sighs and I stare at him in disbelief.

"Of course I'm still mad! You set me up, and like…took my ass virginity!" I hiss and he chuckles a bit.

"Ass virginity? Oh man that's a good one," he says between little giggles and I glare at him, feeling my cheeks heat up. Why do I blush so damn much for fuck sakes?

"Anything you want me to do, you know, to prove myself today?" he asks just watching me and I shift self-consciously, shoving my hands into my pockets.

"Haven't thought of anything yet," I say and I'm reminded of Demyx and Zexion. I look around and realize that everyone is either in the cafeteria or dispersed elsewhere. Demyx and Zexion usually hide out in the library though which is half way across campus from where I am. I vaguely wonder what happened to Patchy the Pirate until I hear Roxas talking to someone.

"Hey Xigbar, what the fuck happened to your face?" I look and well, lo and behold there is Patchy.

"I'm gonna kill you dude!" He says and charges towards me, Roxas stands in-between us and stops him with a look.

"Whoa, what's going on?" he asks and Xigbar dramatically points at his face, glaring at Roxas with one eye, which is kind of swollen.

"That faggot just attacked me and ran off, I'm gonna give him what's coming!" Xigbar says but Roxas stops him with a shake of his head.

"No you aren't. If you so much as look at Martinez over here and I find out, I'll see to it, personally, that you receive far worse," Roxas says casually and shrugs his shoulders when Xigbar looks at him, "I see everything that goes on," Roxas smirks and Patchy the Pirate growls something under his breath as he walks away from us, flipping Roxas the bird as he disappears around the corner.

"Did I do good baby?" Roxas asks and looks at me with a pleased smirk on his lips; I glare at his mouth because it just looks so tempting.

"Shut up," I growl and look anywhere but at Roxas. I hear his laughter and I try and squish the butterflies in my stomach. I need fucking pest control.

"Did you hear, your little mute friend and Larxene are an item," he says and I look at him as if he just asked me to hold his children in my womb. He notices my face and laughs again before shrugging.

"It happened at the party, Larxene is hated by the whole school now but she's a crazy bitch…she doesn't care," Roxas shrugs again and I look at him curiously.

"Do you hate her?" I ask and he looks at me oddly, something in his blue eyes changes but I can't pick it up.

"No, that would make me a hypocrite," he says and I have to ask why.

"Cause, I'm pinning after a freak too," and he just laughs when I whack him over the head with my palm. He fixes his hair, or does something; to be honest it looks exactly the same as before. I didn't even know I messed it up, but apparently I did because he grumbles about me ruining his hair.

"Why do you hang out with those people?" I ask and Roxas looks up at me, I can feel his shrug even before it comes.

"I kind of just always have, since elementary. I like sports, and that's it. I started talking to Riku at practice years ago and I was just added to his group when school started," Roxas says and he doesn't seem to mind, if I was him I would want real friends.

"I've got my best friends and that's all that matters. What happens in high school isn't a big deal, at least to me it isn't. These people are so worried about what's going on in this building, but this is a completely different world from the real one. I just want a scholarship, fuck all the rest," he says and I think it's the most he's talked to me about his feelings. I feel myself softening to him but I quickly stop that and shrug my shoulders.

"Your friends don't come here?" I ask and he shakes his head, looking up at the ceiling.

"They didn't want to go to such a sport oriented school, plus my other friend got sent to boarding school for being a dumb ass," Roxas says and I just watch the muscles in his neck work as he speaks.

"You can meet them one day," he says with a smirk and I scowl at him, watching his blue eyes tell me something that I just can't understand.

"If they are like you, I doubt I'd want to," I reply bitterly and he just laughs it off.

"Well, the warning bell should ring in a few. Think of some little tests for me to prove my love, see you at lunch," he says and walks off. I don't think he realizes just yet what he said, but I do and it leaves me standing here like a deer in headlights.

It must have been a mistake.

Prove his love?

My thoughts skid to a halt when someone slaps my back hard and Demyx's fat head comes into view, followed by Zexion and two blonde heads. One familiar and the other a new sight.

"Look, it's Larxene! She's gonna be hanging with us from now on!" Demyx says with a smile, he probably completely forgot about out little spat earlier.

"Welcome to the freak show," I say and the girl just laughs, her arm securely around Naminé's shoulders. I see her pale face, and for once in all the years of knowing her, she's glowing with happiness.

"Thanks fire crotch," she says and laughs louder when Naminé looks at her horrified. They go off into their own little lover's whatever as I whip around to find Zexion watching them with something akin to jealousy on his face. I brush it off (for now) and shake him by his shoulder.

"Zexion, I have a little proposition to make you," I say and he looks at me, a smirk on his face because he knows I need help planning something.

"Let me hear it," he says and I throw an arm across his shoulders just as the warning bell rings.

* * *

**A/N:** First off, I'd just like to thank everyone for being as amazing as they are and reviewing this story!  
I never thought so much people would actually read this heh.

NOW, the plotting begins!  
BUAHAHAHAH

:}


	10. Take That Anderson

**Chapter Ten: Take That Anderson**

Oh how I love Zexion, how I do love him. I mean, I would marry his brain if that was allowed in this country. But that's besides the point of anything really. We've got this awesome plan, but I'll just let you see it play out. I'm actually far too lazy to explain it. Just let me tell you, it's going to feel so good. I'm going to destroy his image. That pretty much sums up the plan.

I walk into the cafeteria, head held high and ignoring every snicker or whisper as I stride over to my lunch table. Zexion is sitting there reading quietly to himself and Demyx is probably going on about how sexy Xigbar is, while Naminé just chats away with Larxene. I slide into my spot and Zexion looks up from his book smiling a barely there smile, I send him a huge, teeth bearing grin. Today is my day. First no P.E. in the morning cause the coach is away, now I get to humiliate Roxas. Life is good.

Well before I do anything, I have to establish that my feelings aren't hurt by all their stupid little things. I stand up and Demyx looks like he's going to question me but I shake my head and head over to Roxas' table. I notice that it's split, Riku is sitting near the edge of the seat looking at Sora and the small brunette isn't looking at anyone, just staring down at the table top. It's missing Larxene and Kairi which means her girl posse isn't there. Roxas is ignoring everyone else and when he sees me his eyes light up. I ignore it simply because well, it probably doesn't mean anything.

"Hello Roxas," I say and slide into the seat beside him with a little smirk, he looks at me with surprise but scoots over to give me space anyways. Everyone at the table seems to forget their differences for a while and sends me a look. I'm glad I can bring them together.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Riku hisses from his corner and I extend my neck to look at him, I can feel Roxas' gaze on me but I ignore it as I smile at Riku. Part of Zexion's plan was to establish that, whatever they do, I don't give a shit. Apparently they lose power when their victim doesn't care or something. He was speaking in smart so I just really got the gist of it.

"I'm here to sit with Roxas," I say and the whole table starts snickering, I ignore it and swallow the urge to douse them all in kerosene and torch the bitches alive.

"Wow, you think Roxas actually wants you? Fuck you are as stupid as you look," Riku sneers and I look down at Roxas, the blonde is looking at me and judging by the look on his face he knows I have something planned. "None of what happened between you guys was real, he got what he wanted now just leave," he continues and I smirk at Roxas.

"Roxy-baby, care to tell him how wrong he is?" I say and place my hand on Roxas' thigh. The contact is only seen by Roxas and me, but everyone else heard what I said. They all sit there staring, wondering what exactly their leader is going to say, or how he is going to respond. Roxas looks down at my hand and I see all the muscles shift in his neck as he swallows, the muscles in his thigh are tense and I slowly start kneading them, making my way up higher and higher. Roxas looks at me wide eyed and I smirk more.

"Well?" I say and narrow my eyes, Roxas turns his head just as my hand gets to the fork in his jeans, his back is unnaturally stiff as he looks at Riku and the others at the table.

"S-shut up, Riku," Roxas chokes out, and fuck am I ever loving this. I squeeze him through his pants, my little way of saying 'that's not good enough' and his body shudders. His followers are watching him and they all look as if he just told them he's a robot.

"So you're saying you do want him Anderson?" Riku says, raising a silver eyebrow and here I thought his hair was bleached. Roxas is gripping the table, his knuckles almost glowing with how white they are and I squeeze him a little more. I can feel him actually getting hard, which helps in retrospect, because he can't keep his cool with a boner. I rub his still-forming erection and he almost twitches right off the seat.

"Uhnn," he moans, nodding before slamming his face into the table, and groaning deep in his throat. I move my hand quickly and now it just looks like Roxas is going insane.

"Roxas, are you okay?" Sora asks softly and Roxas doesn't answer him, just turns his head to face me and sends me a dirty look, the dirty look to end all dirty looks actually. I notice he's blushing and I send him the biggest smile on earth, only making his blush worse.

"Roxas, look at me, I'm talking to you," Sora says and he sounds pissed, Roxas slowly peals his face off the table top and looks at him. Sora's eyes go wide, and it starts off a chain reaction.

"Is…Anderson…blushing?" Riku says and looks to be on the brink of exploding into loud booming laughter, his bottom lip quivering as Roxas just sits there. His entire table starts laughing and Roxas covers his face, probably the most embarrassed he's ever been in his life. I stand up and stretch just as Roxas uncovers his face and I'm right in Roxas' line of vision. I smirk when his eyes go straight to my stomach as a small strip of skin is revealed.

"You guys are boring, I'm out," I say and walk away, a sway in my step when I reach my table and they are all looking at me in shock, except for Zexion. He's smiling behind the pages of his book. Oh yes, the plan has begun.

"What the hell? I thought you and Anderson were through?" Demyx says and Naminé just nods her head, Larxene though, is looking at me like she knows my game plan. I smirk and shrug.

"I decided I like him, and gave him a second chance," I say and pick up my milk box, drinking it happily. I can still hear Roxas' table laughing and poking fun at the boy. If it wasn't for his high ranking he probably would have been kicked right out of their group, but he is the one who decides that sort of thing, so he can't be kicked out. I hear him tell them to shut the hell up before he knocks all their lights out, and the table slowly quiets down. I chuckle to myself and sip more milk. This was just the beginning.

"Axel Martinez does not give second chances," Demyx says and I can feel him staring at me in disbelief. I shrug my shoulders and lock eyes with Larxene; she's got one of the evilest smirks on the planet.

"I think this is a special case," she says and I smirk right back at her as the lunch bell rings and we all slowly get up. Zexion walks after me as Demyx walks in front with Larxene and Naminé, I nudge him in the ribs and he looks up.

"I think I owe you one," I say and Zexion looks at me curiously, I smile at him, "how about I get you a date with Demyx?" I don't think I've ever seen both of Zexion's eyes until now. He actually pushed his bangs away from his face and used both eyes to look at me. They are actually a really nice colour.

"It could be done Zexy, and I know you want him," I say and he blushes, letting his bangs go and they sweep right down again covering his eye.

"Fine," he says and I hear the excitement hidden behind his monotone. I can pick it up; just the slightest bit and I smile at him as we part ways. He is a lot smarter then me, so he's in all these advanced classes or something. I walk away towards my class with a new mission.

Get Demyx to admit his love and ask Zexion out.

**~*~**

My P.E. class was apparently switched, so now instead of not having the class at all today I have one now, right after fucking lunch. I hate sweating, especially on a full stomach. I'm jogging around the track, and our usual coach is out sick or something so our coach is actually the science teacher. I groan when he blows the whistle and has us all walk over to him.

"As you all know, my strengths lie in science," there's a collective sigh amongst the jocks because this means there will be a free period and they don't get to work out and sweat as hard as usual with the coach pushing them. "So, just have fun okay guys?" the science teacher says and walks towards a bench, probably gonna go read or something. I spot Roxas and smirk; this is the perfect time to strike.

"Anderson," I say walking over and he's all alone, perfect.

"Hey," he says, and finishes tying his shoe. He straightens up and looks at me with a soft smile; I almost feel bad until I remember what he did. I smirk and grab his wrist, pulling him into the completely empty storage room. Roxas looks around and I take advantage of the fact that he's completely distracted.

I slam him against the wall, knocking the air out of him and he looks at me as he gasps for breath. I smirk at him and hold him firmly in place.

"Fuck, I can see why you like doing this. Feels good," I say and he's slowly gaining his breath back. I crush my lips against his before he can actually breathe properly and I spread his legs with my knee, pushing my leg against his crotch and making him moan into my mouth. He grinds his hips into mine, and I almost choke out a moan.

"My days of being your bitch are over," I hiss as I rip my lips away from the boy's mouth. His neck is perfectly exposed and I lick it softly before I sink my teeth into it and he hisses out in pain. I suck harshly, pulling the skin into my mouth and making sure to leave a nice big, purple and blue hickey. It's right in the middle of his neck and I'm sure half the world will be able to see it. He groans, his tiny, thin fingers digging into my shoulders as he tries to weakly push me away.

I like dominance; I should have tried this earlier.

I look at his face when I pull away and it's flushed, his lips red and bruised and all I can think is…_perfect_.

I whip my cell phone out and snap a picture. It's a great fucking picture too, his lips are parted as he pants and his hair is all fucked and god damn, it's just great. I pull away fully now, and he almost loses balance without me supporting him. I slip the phone back into my pocket and poke his hickey when he looks up at me. I smirk and turn; I completely ignore his tented shorts.

"I want to see that, and everyone else has to see it too," I say, repeating exactly what he said to me not too long ago. I walk out of the storage closet and text Zexion the picture. My little computer whiz.

I know that by tomorrow, this picture will be everywhere.

**~*~**

Remember what I said I'd do for Zexion?

Okay, so it's a lot harder then I first thought. Demyx is a fucking dumbass and does not understand any of the hints I'm dropping. For Zexion's sake I didn't just come right out and say it because I knew he wouldn't like that, but god damn, I'm just about to scream it to the high heavens.

"Do you like anyone at school Demyx?" I ask for the billionth time and the stupid blonde just buttons his jacket and twists his mouth up in thought.

"Well yeah, there's my friends, how many times you gonna ask?" he says with a smile and I smack myself hard on the face.

"No, I mean like, dating like…dumbass," the last part is of course whispered and Demyx just shrugs, closing his locker and we start walking.

"There is this one guy, but he doesn't like me," Demyx says with a sad little sigh and I do a tiny dance of success. That one guy is probably Zexion.

"Who is it, common you can tell me," I say in that pestering way all friends do when they want information. Demyx looks at me a little doubtfully and shakes his head.

"No way, you'll tell him," Demyx says and right there he notices his mistake and I smirk at him, I probably look more then just a little creepy.

"Oh ho ho, what?" I say just to tease the boy and he groans, hoisting his guitar up high on his shoulder and marching away from me. I catch up easy enough and grip his arm, making him turn and look at me. I smile softly and shake my head.

"I've known about you liking Zexion since forever, it's so obvious. He likes you too, ask him out on a date," I say and Demyx's eyes look like the sky on the fourth of July.

"Are you serious dude?" he says, his voice squeaky with excitement and I nod my head. He turns on his heel and runs, I don't know where he goes exactly but I'd be willing to bet money that he went to find Zexion.

So I'm left walking alone towards my house, but it isn't so bad. I got my music and for once I can actually enjoy it without background noise. I notice the black SUV driving slowly along side me and I rip my ear buds out, stopping just as the car stops too. The passenger side opens and I see Roxas sitting in the car smiling, I groan but climb in anyways because I hate the cold and nothing else.

"Huh…just like that?" he says with a smirk and I send him an evil look. He's wearing a scarf.

"I hate the cold," I say with a shrug and turn to look out the window. I hear sniffling coming from the back and I turn even more and look. I see Sora wiping at his eyes and he's crying. Roxas seems to be ignoring him or something so I take it upon myself to comfort the tiny Anderson, maybe even make Roxas jealous in the process.

"Hey…you okay Sora?" I ask gently and I feel Roxas' eyes land on me right away. Sora looks up and shakes his head; he's one of those people that look good crying and I feel so bad for him.

"Am I not attractive or something? Why would he do that?" Sora sobs and it seems like he's just breaking down now. He's pretty tough, sucking it up until after school but I guess he didn't want Riku to see him crying.

"Axel, would you date me?" he asks and there's this weird glint in his blue eyes. I notice the tears are completely gone but before I can say anything or ponder on it Roxas slams on the brakes, jostling us around and I send him a dirty look. He shrugs with a small smile on his face.

"The light just changed," he says and I growl as I turn and look at Sora, who's still watching me with those blue eyes. Why can't I read people at all?

"I would totally date you," I say with a charming smile, Sora smiles softly at me and pecks me on the cheek. Again Roxas slams on the brakes and Sora almost flies into the front of the car. He looks at his brother in the rearview and we both notice the way his hands are about to snap the steering wheel in half.

"What the hell Roxas?" Sora says angrily and Roxas looks at him like he wants to kill him. I send Roxas a look but his electric blue eyes are glaring daggers at Sora.

"Stop that Sora, lay off Axel," he growls and Sora scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest while sending Roxas a challenging look.

"And why should I?" the small brunette asks and his tone is just so bitchy. Roxas looks just about ready to stop the car and strangle his brother.

"Because you're just insecure right now and are looking towards anything with a dick to make you feel good," Roxas growls and Sora looks at him with shock, his tiny mouth hanging open. I fear for my life at this moment because if they start to fight Roxas is going to loose control of the car and we are totally going to die.

"That's not true, what if I _actually_ like Axel?" Sora sneers and Roxas steers the car off the road and almost onto the curve. He unbuckles his seat belt and turns fully to face Sora, I press myself against the door, and ready to run out if need be.

"What do you mean actually like Axel?" Roxas growls and Sora chuckles, what the hell is this brunette doing? Does he want to die?

"I'm not like you, I date people cause I like them, I'm sure Axel does that too. If I like him, then I can date him," Sora replies and I see a vein pulsing in Roxas' neck.

"You don't like Axel, lay off him Sora," Roxas says and Sora looks at me with a horrible glint in his eyes. Suddenly Sora is pressing his lips against mine and my eyes are wide with shock as the tiny brunette kisses me with something akin to passion. It only lasts a few seconds because Roxas is ripping Sora away from me and punching him back into place.

"I said LAY OFF, SORA!" Roxas yells and he turns to glare at me, I stare at him as he grips the back of my head and smashes out lips together, nipping at my bottom lip and forcing my mouth open with his strong tongue. The urge to kiss him back is too strong so I start moving my lips against his. He pulls away only enough to breathe and Sora is silent in the back seat. I wonder if Roxas knocked him out until I hear the leather shift with the boy's weight.

"He's mine, I do like him," Roxas whispers against my lips, his fingers still tightly tangled in my hair, "You're mine," he says over and over but it just drags off into mumbles. Sora clears his throat and we both rip away from each other and he's looking at us. It's amazing how completely different he's acting now. The little glint is gone and now I can't see anything in his eyes.

"I just wanted to see if you liked him for real, I wasn't going to let you hurt him again," Sora says with a shrug when Roxas looks at him with a death threat in those blue orbs.

"What?" Roxas asks dumbly and I have to stare at Sora with a stupid expression, the brunette just laughs and rests his head against the seat while shrugging.

"You reacted all possessive, so you must like him. I just wanted to make sure of that," he says and looks out the window, "but it's good to know you'd date me Axel," he says with a wink and Roxas just buckles his seat belt, driving the car back onto the road. I am really confused right about now, I mean…that was one of the weirdest things I've experienced in my life to date but they seem completely unfazed by it.

"You're a bitch Sora," Roxas says after a while, I can see my apartment complex off in the horizon. Sora chuckles softly.

"I've been told," he says and Roxas smiles softly, stopping at a red light.

"Thanks," Roxas says and Sora just shrugs, saying something about being brothers. What the fuck?

"So…what just happened?" I ask and Roxas laughs along with Sora but neither of them answers me. I feel the beginnings of frustration bubble inside of me as Roxas pulls up in front of my building. He smiles at me, that beautiful genuine smile that makes me forget everything around me. I can hear the music in the silence of the SUV leak out of my ear buds. I notice it's _Boulders_ by New Found Glory, it's kind of fitting I think.

"Sora was just helping me, I'll see you tomorrow…" Roxas says as I climb out of the car. I chuckle as I go to close the door; before I do I point at his neck and smirk.

"No scarves tomorrow," I say and close the door.

I'm not done with my revenge. I totally bet you thought that just cause I kissed him I was getting soft on him, but no, I'm still as angry as ever.

That kiss meant nothing!

Okay, maybe I liked it just a little.

* * *

**A/N:** You guys have to listen to Boulders, like you don't have to...put omfg it's just so fitting xD  
Its soo funny, it just started playing while I was writting and BAM  
I was like  
Woah...

Axel and Roxas song  
Right there.

Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy this (:


	11. Demyx says what?

**Chapter Eleven: Demyx says what?**

I walk into the school and the first thing I notice is the clusters of students standing by the walls or in front of their lockers, all huddled and whispering things to each other in hushed tones. I smirk because I know what they're looking at. I walk by a print out of that picture I took of Roxas and smirk, Zexion put all the same things they did to me on Roxas, cum included. I feel jealousy start in the pit of my stomach, because I wanted to be the only one who ever saw Roxas like that…all hot and bothered and…Whoa when did I start thinking like that?

"MARTINEZ!" that scream can only come from one person, and it's just music to my ears. I turn around slowly and see Roxas storming over to me, he's wearing a turtle neck and I feel like screaming as he stops in front of me. Why can't he just show his neck, that masterpiece I created shouldn't be hidden from the world!

His blue eyes are blazing with fury and there's a whole bunch of crumpled papers in his hands. "What the fuck?" he hisses and I smile brightly just as he punches me in the face, sending me sprawling backwards. "This isn't fair! I'm being nice to you, you fucker and this is what I get?" he growls as he helps me to my feet by tugging on the collar of my shirt. I swat his hands away and glare at him, eyes oozing venom but he doesn't flinch or anything. My fucking jaw hurts!

"It isn't fair?" I say, a small sarcastic chuckle escaping and half of the students in the hall are almost snapping their necks just to hear our conversation, Roxas looks like he's about to blow a gasket, his tiny hands curling tighter around the paper. I wipe the blood from the corner of my lips and scowl at him.

"Don't you dare say that I'm being unfair when you did the same exact thing to me, anything is fair in this Roxas," I sneer and he looks confused, he shakes his head and throws the papers onto the floor in a show of maturity. Oh sarcasm, where would I be with out you?

"Anything is fair in this? What is _this _exactly? I thought I was supposed to prove to you that I like you, not be some fucking joke," he hisses and I just notice how red his cheeks are, they're burning with embarrassment, clearly.

"Maybe that's just how you have to prove it. Why? You plan on quitting?" I say and raise an eyebrow; he looks torn between saying yes and shaking his head. He looks down instead and stares long and hard at the floor.

"Fine…if that's how you want to play Martinez, I'm not fucking quitting but I won't be at this shit forever, you either like me or you don't," he says and looks up at me, eyes filled with something but I just don't know what, with Roxas I never know, fuck I never know with anyone. I stare down at him and he just turns on his heel, leaving me there watching his retreating form as he barrels through the students, sending people who don't move out of his way flying in every direction.

I stare at the few people still watching me and scowl before marching off to find someone I enjoy being around. Part of me wants to follow Roxas and apologize for being a dick but the bigger part of me pulls me in the opposite direction towards the place I know Naminé will be sitting with Larxene.

I reach this little empty space under the staircase and I hear Larxene's booming laugh and Naminé's quiet giggles, I slide under and they stop talking for a moment to regard me.

"What happened this time hot shot?" Larxene says with a smirk and Naminé smacks her arm, shaking her head and looking at me with those soft, kind eyes.

"What's wrong Axel?" she asks the same question only nicely, and I shrug feeling a pout tugging at my bottom lip. Naminé sighs and scoots over, sliding in between Larxene and me. The other blonde just watches us and smiles, shaking her head.

"You baby him too much Nami-dear, when's he gonna learn to be a man?" Larxene says with a chuckle and I glare at her, though I feel like laughing at the truth behind her statement. Naminé just shushes her and pats my crazy red hair.

"Go on baby, tell Mama Nami everything," Larxene coos from behind her girlfriend and Naminé rolls her eyes, I laugh softly and shake my head.

"Roxas just got really mad at the pictures," I say with a shrug and Larxene barks out laughter, clutching her middle and rolling onto her side. Naminé sighs and sends me what could be called a dirty look, though with Naminé it's just sort of this face where she lowers her eyebrows, squints her eyes a little and tightens her lips.

"Well you can't blame him, you got angry too…Axel why don't you just drop this crazy revenge stuff?" Naminé says always one for peace; of course she'd want me to make amends with that blonde bastard.

"I'm not dropping it until I know he likes me for sure," I say with a deep scowl and Larxene chooses now to stop laughing at Roxas' expense and sends me a nasty look.

"You do know who Anderson is right? You think if he didn't like you he'd be putting up with half of this shit, or even bothering with you?" Larxene says with one thin brow raised and I don't know what to say to that. She looks at me like I'm stupid or slow, or possibly both.

"You're a dumbass, flaming bush; obviously he has the hots for you. He's been so cruel to all the other people he's dated, and now he's going out of his way for your skinny ass. You know, I always knew he secretly liked you," Larxene says with a nod and Naminé hums her agreement.

"Wait…did you just call me flaming bush?" I say with a disgusted look on my face and Naminé seems to just catch on too, she turns her head and looks about to vomit.

"Larx, why!" she squeals and the girl just laughs, cackles really, and wraps her arms around Naminé. I sigh and crawl out from under the stairs.

"I'm gonna see if Zexy and Demyx are around, see if they've boned yet and what not," I say with a wink and Naminé looks horrified while Larxene just smirks and waves me away. I walk up the stairs not actually going to find them; I'll just talk to Demyx in second period or something.

It's really getting to me, if even a little. I mean, Naminé has this great, normal relationship and I bet Demyx and Zexion have a nice normal one too just blossoming and here I am with this fucked up…I don't even know what to call it. I groan as the bell rings, I have to go all the way back downstairs to get to the gym and I'm very grouchy about that.

I walk into the gym and head for the locker room, most of the class is already changed and ready to go, I'm always the last to walk out. I push the door open and hear someone grunt; paying no attention to the meat head I walk over to my locker and rip the door open. Am I always this pleasant during gym you ask? Why yes, yes I am.

I pull two sweatbands around my wrists and tug my sweater off, I hear a low whistle as I tug my shirt over my head and I fling my body around, scanning the locker room. Roxas is leaning against the far wall watching me, a smirk on his pink lips and his arms crossed over his chest.

"Well, don't let me stop you," he says still smirking and I feel my cheeks start to burn as I turn and unbuckle my belt slowly; I shoot a look at him over my shoulder and unzip my pants, he holds my gaze as I pull the zipper down and for some reason this is strangely intimate.

The sound of my fly opening is like a machine gun going off in the silence and my heart is pounding hard against my ribcage as I tug my pants down in front of Roxas. He's just watching me and biting the corner of his bottom lip. I step out of my pants and quickly grab my shorts.

"Strip show's over, get out," I say and slip the shorts on, snapping the waist band for good measure.

"Damn," Roxas breathes and in a few short strides he's at my side, pushing me against the cool metal of the lockers and eyeing me hungrily. I hiss as the cold steel makes contact with the bare skin of my back. "I never got to appreciate your body the first time, in fact…I've never seen this much of you," he says, his hands sliding down my sides and making me shiver, the muscles in my stomach twitching as his hands slide over the pale skin. "I like it," he adds, licking his lips like some starved animal.

"A-aren't you mad at me?" I stutter like a complete jackass and he just smirks,

"I told you I wasn't quitting," he goes on his tiptoes and brushes his lips against mine; I can't resist and start kissing him back. I'm spineless and weak, call me whatever you want or maybe Roxas is just really damn attractive. His hands slip behind me and rest on the small of my back, pulling me against him and I wrap my arms around his neck, nipping at his bottom lip.

"Fuck Martinez, you drive me crazy," he groans against my lips, I hold his bottom one in between my teeth and tug on the pink skin gently before I delve my tongue into his mouth finding his and slowly they start sliding against each other. Our faces probably look melded together, but our kiss only gets deeper and Roxas softly sucks on my tongue before pulling away, his lips shinny with spit and I don't really like saliva, never have, but I won't lie…he looks good enough to eat…and I absolutely despise when people say that, so why did I use it? What the heck is that supposed to mean…like cannibalism is erotic or something?

"Are you alright?" Roxas asks pulling me out of my mental rant and I shake my head, but then realize it looks like I'm answering so I nod. He looks confused for a second and lets out an awkward chuckle, you know, the one people use when there's a very strange moment in their conversation and they don't know what to say? Yeah, that one.

"Sorry, I was just thinking," I decide to say and he smiles at me before picking up my t-shirt and handing it too me.

"Here, put this on or else we'll never get out of here," he says smirking. I blush and slide it over my big hair, Roxas tilts his head to the side and I send him a questioning look.

"How do you get your hair like that?" he asks with sincere curiosity and I smirk, taping my temple in the process.

"Axel tricks. Same with how I get my eyebrows like this," I reply and he laughs shaking his head.

"You didn't forget?" he asks and I smirk as we walk out of the locker room. The coach sees Roxas and yells at him to hurry up, the team needs to discuss something while the rest of us run laps and Roxas groans before shooting me a charming smile and jogging away.

He's a very nice runner, good form and whatever else they judge them by. I'm just judging him by how his ass looks, really.

I don't really get to talk to Roxas during gym, the coach is freaking out and doubling practice seeing as some big game is coming up, he has the rest of the class doing nothing but running laps while he worries about his little football team. Whatever, I'm used to just jogging around during gym.

It gives me time to think really, about this whole Roxas thing. I'm not even that mad anymore so what happens now? I start walking slowly, I can't think and run at the same time, it's not in my nature.

Do I just tell him I forgive him, or do I set up some date or something, take him to a movie and tell him there? Ugh what the fuck, I'm not proposing to the damn midget! I'm simply telling him I don't hate his guts anymore…

Whatever, I'll get Zexion to help me.

**~*~**

"Axel, I do believe you need to start thinking for yourself," Zexion says taking his usual seat and uncapping his French spring Alps water or whatever he drinks. All I know is that it's in a green bottle and would never touch my lips.

"But why?" I whine, my voice going to an annoyingly high octave (take that Mariah Carey) and Demyx's sensitive musician ears must be bleeding. Said boy shoots me a look and what'd you know, he plugs his ears. "I have you Zexy, can't you just help me?" I ask and send him my best puppy dog look; Zexion just scoffs and ignores my big eyes-pouty lips combo.

"Axel, you look like a maingy mutt when you do that, not at all heart warming or moving," he says and stabs a fork violently into his salad, what did that lettuce ever do to you Zexy?

I groan and smack my head into the table.

"How can I look like a cute puppy and make you love me?" I ask voice muffled by the table and I notice it faintly smells like chocolate milk. I don't know whether to be amazed or disgusted by it.

"Do I _want _to know what you're talking about?" asks someone from my left side, I raise my head and come face to stomach with Roxas. I smile a little awkwardly at him because I can't tell him I'm trying to look like an animal to get Zexion to help me formulate yet another plan that involves him.

"I hate dogs," Zexion decides to add and I shoot him a look as Roxas slides in beside me, Demyx looks at him as if he were trying to burn him alive with his stare and Roxas raises both his eyebrows.

"What?" he asks and Demyx, being the idiot he is opens his big mouth.

"I didn't know you'd actually sit here…you know, after what you did to Ax," he says and I feel like strangling him. This is where I send Zexion a look saying _"hey, make your big baboon of a boyfriend shut up before I use his urethra to strange him"_ and Zexion seems to catch on. I feel the kick he delivers under the table and Demyx jumps in his seat, Roxas looks at him curiously and I decide to steer them all away from that topic.

"So, when's the game?" I ask and feel like ripping my eyelids off, Roxas is totally going to know I care about him. God damn it, good going smoothster.

"This Friday, are you guys coming?" Roxas asks and I know he only adds my friends because of me; he'd never invite them anywhere. I know he doesn't like them and they don't really like him.

"I don't know if I can," I say thinking about my appointment with Aerith that I really didn't want to go to. I'm not crazy, I swear to Hosanna.

"Aw, come on Martinez," Roxas says and everyone at the table is amazed that Roxas is close to begging me. I feel proud of myself; I've got the big bad Roxas Anderson wrapped around my finger.

"I probably can, I don't know I have to see," I say with a shrug and he smiles, before uncapping his water and taking a swig.

"Well, after the game there's gonna be a celebration, my house as usual," He says and I know he's inviting us, I look around the table and Larxene looks at me with a smirk.

"I'm down for a good party, how about you Nam?" Larxene asks looking down at Naminé, the smaller blonde simply nods her head. Demyx jumps on any chance to be in a room with blaring music so he nods and Zexion just agrees to be with Demyx.

"Guess we'll all be there," I say and smirk at Roxas, he smirks back and stands up stretching.

"Well, I gotta head back to the gym. Coach is going fucking nuts with these practices," he says and waves himself off, running out of the caff and to his beloved football team.

"I can't believe we're going to another fucking prep party…Didn't you learn?" Demyx says and I turn to look at him with a very nasty glare.

"Shut the hell up," I say and it comes out a lot more viciously then I had planned.

"Whoa, don't fucking snap on me!" Demyx says back just as viciously and I glare at him, eyes going into tiny slits.

"Well don't say stupid shit! If you don't want to go, just don't!" Demyx stares at me, his mouth twisted into an angry scowl and I look back at him.

"I'm going to back up my dumb ass friend! To make sure you don't get yourself hurt again!" He shouts and stands up, I stand too and we're basically nose to nose.

"You didn't do anything the first time around, what makes this time different?" I hiss and he looks like he wants to hit me.

"I know what to expect this time!" he shouts and I step back, fists itching with the urge to hit bone and I stare at him and I'm sure he can see the fury in my eyes.

"What the fuck Demyx? You think I'm going to let that happen again, you think I'm that stupid?" I growl and he looks at me, his eyes say it all. He does think that.

"Look what he did to you Axel, and you're still hung up on him! Why don't you realize that someone like Anderson will never really like you?" He screams and that's it, I cock my fist back and it makes a nasty sound when it collides with his jaw. He flies back, landing on his ass and I stand over him looking ready to kill.

"And why won't he like me Demyx? Is it because of your precious high school food chain? Is it because I'm a freak? That hierarchy won't mean shit in a year; it won't mean shit when everyone here goes off into the real fucking world, so fuck you!" I scream and he's tackling me to the floor, punching me hard in the same spot Roxas had hit me this morning. I struggle to get him off me, wriggling and he grips my wrists slamming them by my head. My fucking scars start to burn and I tug more furiously against his hold, his calloused fingertips digging into my skin and I feel trapped…suffocated.

"He would have never noticed you if it wasn't for that dare. He'll never fucking care about you like I do, he'll never fucking put up with your shit like I have. Four fucking years Martinez and I still put up with it! You are stupid," with that he gets off me and storms out of the cafeteria. I sit up slowly and Zexion is staring at me, in fact everyone is staring at me as I stand up off the floor and dash out behind Demyx. What the fuck was that about?

I find him, just outside resting against the brick wall with tears streaming down his face as he stares at the football team running laps and I see the bruise forming on his pale skin just on his jaw line under his ear. He turns when he hears the door click shut and he glares at me before roughly wiping the tears away. I walk up to him slowly, like he's a scared animal and I try to form a sentence in my head but nothing is coming.

"I thought I'd stop after you started dating Anderson, I thought I had forgotten all these silly feelings I have for you but I didn't dude and it fucking sucks," Demyx groans, his eyes glazing over with tears and I feel crushed.

"W-what do you mean?" I ask dumbly and he just laughs bitterly, wiping his eyes.

"I've liked you since freshmen year dude, and when you told me Zexion liked me…I got excited at the chance to forget you. Zexion's been my best friend for years, and I've liked him but never as much as you…Fuck Ax, you've never been good at reading people," Demyx laughs and I don't know what to say, I can hear the football team running around the field, the coach's shouts telling Roxas to focus but I ignore it and stare as Demyx moves closer to me.

"You…you've hidden it so well," I say dumbly and Demyx shakes his head, sighing sadly.

"I guess I did…," he whispers and now he's just too close to me.

"I still like you so much," he says quietly and cups my face; I stare at him frozen on the spot. He likes me… Since freshmen year? How come I had never noticed this…my thoughts are abruptly stopped as he presses his lips against mine and I still can't move, even as he presses harder. I hear someone running towards us, their feet pounding the ground and Demyx wraps his arms around my neck, pulling himself closer. The runner stops and my eyes are just staring down at Demyx, his eyes are shut tightly and there's a few tears slipping out regardless.

"Martinez?" that voice…it's Roxas and Demyx holds me tighter, and I can't pull away without hurting one of my best friends.

"Axel…" Roxas says hoping that calling my real name with get my attention and he sounds hurt, I pull away from Demyx and he stares up at me, blue eyes filled with tears and it breaks my heart to see him like this. I turn slowly and stare down at Roxas, his skin glistening with a sheen layer of sweat and he looks back and forth between Demyx and me. Demyx slips his arms away from me and I stumble a little, moving further away from him.

"Axel…" Demyx says and I'm standing there in between both of them not quite sure what to do.

Both pairs of blue eyes staring at me, one pair electric blue the other nearing teal and I just don't know what to do. My heart's pounding hard, I can feel it pulsing in my temples and their stares are burning me.

"I….I…" my voice sounds foreign even to me, and I turn slightly to look at Demyx, his hair that's all uniquely his, his kind eyes all red and puffy with tears and his bottom lip jutted out in an almost-pout, my head shoots to the side and I look at Roxas, his blonde hair clinging to his face with sweat and his blue eyes are just staring at me, and for the first time I see actual emotion in them, clear and unhidden. It's hurt and his lips are sealed tightly shut, almost as if he doesn't want to speak anymore.

I shut my eyes tight, tangling my fingers in my hair and tugging roughly, the head ache is full blown now, my brain feels swollen and like it's pressing against my skull, the thick bone cracking and splintering from the pressure.

The world starts to go black and foggy around the edges, almost as if I'm going through a dark portal into another world, slipping away from everything and the last thing I feel is my head hitting the pavement, the last thing I hear is both Demyx and Roxas shouting my name.

But I like it here, in this darkness.

I think I'm going to stay awhile.

* * *

**A/N:** Who expected that?  
Definitely not Axel.

Sorry for the long wait for this chapter, I'm just getting ready for exams that are in like two weeks. I have an exam for every class this semester, that's alot of studying XD

Hope you guys can be patient with me, especially when it comes to TCaTR D:  
Plus I've got a few other stories I might put up soon -hinthint-

Anyway, I hope you like this (:


	12. It's Not Tuesday, But That's Okay

****

Chapter Twelve: It's Not Tuesday, But That's Okay

"_Mi hijo, despiértate…" the dark looming figure whispers into the slumbering child's ear. The boy's eyes slowly open and take in his surroundings before he realizes that his wrists are tied to the wooden headboard of his bed, and panic start to bubble in his stomach as he tries to make out his father's facial features while tugging on the bindings._

_"¿Que pasa papa?" he asks quietly, blinking owlishly while looking up at his father, the man simply shakes his head, his hand caressing the boy's exposed thigh and making the small child recoil slightly at the strange tough._

"_Nada mi hijo," the man whispers, and the boy looks around his room, only to see someone else standing at the foot of his bed, the hallway light shinning into the room and darkening the man's features as it outlines his body with a strange orangey glow._

_"¿M-mi mama?" the boy whimpers, fear settling in his core and branching out, his brain sending his body signals that he was in danger though he had trouble understanding why. This was his father, he would never hurt him._

"_Se fue a la casa de la tía por el fin de semana…" his father answers just at the other dark figure climbs onto the bed, the closer he gets the more the boy can see his face and he realizes that it's his uncle who's been living with them for years. Surely his uncle wouldn't hurt him either._

_The boy's eyes go wide as his uncle pulls the sheets away from his body, exposing his thin body, the light from the hallway still shinning brightly into the room. The tiny boy looks questioningly at his father, his throat going dry as his uncle touches his legs, rough calloused fingers gliding along his skin and leaving a sickening feeling on the boy's soft thighs._

_"¿Que están haciendo?" he asks, his voice shaking with fear but his father just shakes his head and tells him to be quiet, or else he'll wake up his little sister. The boy shuts his mouth, not wanting to cause trouble but when his uncle begins undressing him, he squirms and tries to pull away._

_"¿T-tío…que…que haces?" the boy asks, squeezing his legs together and twisting away, trying not to let his uncle undress him. That wasn't right, why was he doing this?_

"_Quédate quieto niño," his father hisses and tugs the boy's face in his direction by his hair, making the small child's eyes water as he looks up at his father, his uncle pulling off his shorts and exposing him to the cold air in the room. The boy feels tears filling his eyes as he is forced to look at his father._

"_N-No me gusta," he cries, fear making him cry loudly as his uncle touches him in places his mother had told him no one was supposed to touch. He kicks his legs around furiously; trying to get his uncle to stop but the man simply grunts and grips his calves, pushing his legs up till his knees touch his chest._

_The boy begins to tug against the ropes, the soft flesh on his wrists burning as he twists his arms around trying to free them from the hold. Then his entire world freezes as he feels something forced into his body, his eyes going round as his mouth opens to scream out but his father muffles his cries with his hand, watching as the other male slides into the tiny body. The boy squirms, as tears stream out of his eyes, pain rippling through him and he tugs harder against the bindings only succeeding in making them dig deeper into his thin wrists,_ _"Déjenme, salgan_ _de mi cuarto!" the boy screams, his tears choking him._

"_Cállate!" his father hisses as the boy keeps screaming into his heavy palm, it's suffocating him but he keeps screaming and tugging against the ropes that are holding him in place. He screams for his sister, for his big brother, for anyone to save him but no one comes. He can feel a warm liquid sliding down his arms and leaking onto the bed, he's too afraid to check if it's blood._

_He feels his uncle leave his body, a disgusting feeling between his legs mixing with the immense pain ripping him in half, and when he hears his father unbuckle his belt, his eyes go round and he shakes his head._

"_N-No mas, por favor…no papa," he cries out, screaming until his throat feels raw but his father doesn't listen._

**~*~**

I wake up screaming, my eyes filled with tears and my entire face feels wet. I blink once I'm sitting up right and realize that I'm in a hospital room. The too white walls definitely don't belong to my bedroom, and the rough itchy sheets thrown over my legs aren't mine. I look around crazily, my heart beating much too quickly and I scream again because I'm scared…why am I here?

I feel the needle that's stuck in my hand and I look down at it, blinking the tears out of my eyes as I grip the plastic tube connected to it. With one harsh tug, I rip the I.V out of my vein painfully and look around panting, the heart monitor beeping loudly as I swing my legs over the edge of the mattress and unclip that blood pressure thing from my finger tip. That really makes the machine squeal and when I try to get out of bed my legs feel like jelly. I wriggle on my feet, stumbling towards the door and tugging it open with a desperate pull. I need to get out of here!

A nurse is standing in the exit way when I manage to swing the door open, looking like he just ran a marathon and when he sees me, his eyes widen and I hear Reno shouting from down the hallway, his boots stomping and creating too much noise for a hospital. The nurse tries to lead me back to the bed but I refuse and I try to hit him, why am I here in the first place?

He struggles with me, trying to stop my weak attempts at landing a punch until Reno appears and I slump against the nurse's body, my eyes still streaming tears and I don't know why I'm crying. Reno rushes over and pulls me away from the nurse and towards the bed, holding me up against him. I plop down on it, completely drained though I didn't really move much.

"Why am I here?" I ask as the nurse looks at my irritated hand, the hole where the I.V was is swelling and looks too red against my pale skin.

"Did you rip out your I.V?" the nurse asks and I blush before nodding my head, he makes a disapproving noise in his throat and pulls away saying something about going to get the doctor and being back shortly. Reno waits for the man to leave before he turns to look at me worriedly.

"You had me scared half to death kiddo," he says and I look at him confusedly and he sighs.

"Don't you remember yo? You passed out at school on Tuesday," he says and I look at him like he's crazy, at least I know I wasn't in the psyche ward or something but wait…isn't it _still_ Tuesday?

"And no little dude, it ain't still Tuesday, it's freaking Friday night yo," Reno says with glassy eyes and I gawk at him, staring because I've never seen Reno close to crying before. Reno looks at me tired and I realize he's probably been running between the hospital, home and his work all week basically.

"Sorry," I say quietly and he open-palm smacks me on the back of the head, I grin up at him while he scowls, his mouth twitching in a feeble attempt to hide his smile.

"You had us scared, the doc said if you didn't wake up in 48 hours then they didn't know when you'd wake up…comas are apparently like that yo," Reno says and I frown, realizing he had said us.

"By us…who do you mean?" I ask and my question is answered when the door opens and Roxas walks in, still wearing his football uniform and I look at him shocked. "Any news Reno?" he asks and when he looks up, I see face streaked with mud and his uniform covered in grass stains. His eyes light up when he sees me awake and he rushes over, dropping his helmet which lands on Reno's toe, the man yelps in pain and stumbles over to a chair.

"You're awake!" he shouts happily and I stare at him lost and confused, Reno chuckles before explaining to me that Roxas has been staying at the hospital with me during the night after school. I stare at him with wide eyes and he smiles softly at me, simply staring back.

"Fuck, I thought you'd never wake up," he breathes out and plops tiredly onto an armchair pulled close to the bed. "I didn't know how much longer my spine could take being hunched over you without snapping," he says with a smile and my tongue is just frozen in my mouth.

"H-How'd the game go?" Is all I can bring myself to ask and Roxas seems to glow; his smile is just spurting pride and joy, right away I know they won.

"It was awesome! You should have seen me man, Tidus was all like 'Roxas!' and I was half way across the field but I heard him and I had to turn and sprint cause he had already thrown the ball and I made it just in time, totally slid right into the end zone!" he shouts excitedly and Reno just stares at him looking incredibly bored, like Roxas has been sport-talking him to death while I was asleep and I try and show interest. Roxas though, is too smart for his own good and notices our boredom.

"Alright, I'll stop with the football talk," he says and rolls his eyes; I feel a twinge of pity and apologize.

"Sorry Rox, I'm glad you won," I say and he seems to choke on his spit before smirking at me and I feel myself almost blush.

"Mr. Martinez?" a deep voice from the door draws everyone's attention towards the doctor, standing there with a bright smile as he walks over.

"I'm glad to have you join us," he says with a chuckle as he reads over the papers on his clip board, Roxas scoots away from the bed a bit and gives the man some space as he walks closer to me.

He picks up my injured hand gingerly and examines the wound I inflicted, shaking his head and looking at me with those disapproving eyes.

"I can't say I'm surprised though, many patients wake up in shock, so this happens quite often. Let me just run a few tests, get you a band aid for that hand and we should have you out of here by tomorrow night," the doctor says before excusing himself and leaving the room with the nurse. I groan and flop back onto my pillows.

"I want to leave now," I say and Reno just shakes his head.

"You can't yo. You were passed out for the better part of a freakin' week," he says and stands up, stretching lazily before sighing.

"I have to get home, I'll be back tomorrow yo," Reno says and I smile, nodding my head. He probably has to shower and get things ready for work.

"I'll see you then," I say and he walks over to the bed, hugging me tightly.

"Get better bro," he says with a smile and leaves the room, looking at Roxas before closing the door. I look towards the blonde and he smiles.

"I met your brother the day I went to apologize, so it wasn't as awkward as you might think," he says with a shrug and I laugh softly before remembering something I had to say to Roxas.

"Hey…uhm…I forgive you," I say kind of pathetically and his eyes go wide, his mouth opening and just hanging there. "I wasn't as mad as I acted…I mean…It did hurt but…I like you too much to hate you," I mumble and Roxas stands beside my bed, just watching me with his eyes wide and sparkly.

"Oh, well…I'm glad," he says and scratches at the back of his head, a bright smile on his face when I look up at him. I smile a little then he snaps his head in my direction and glares at me. "If you like me so much, why were you making out with Demyx behind the school?" he asks angrily and I can see the jealousy on his face. I feel my eyes almost pop out of my head as the memories from Tuesday flood my brain and I remember just what lead to me passing out.

"Oh shit! He told me he likes me," I say out loud and Roxas glares at me, I can see him biting the inside of his cheek and he grumbles something under his breath. "What was that?" I ask and he looks out the window at the other end of the room.

"I…sort of…beat the shit out of him," He says with a shrug and I shoot up in bed, staring at him with wide eyes.

"You beat up Demyx!?" I shout and he shifts a little on the spot, chewing on his lip nervously.

"Yes," he says and I think it's the first time I've ever heard of Roxas personally going after someone. He usually sends other people to do it for him; he's never dirtied his hands with anyone else's blood.

"Why?" I ask dumbly and he stares at me like I'm stupid, his mouth in a straight expressionless line and he rolls his eyes.

"Because he was kissing you…and he was real into it too, he even had the nerve to come visit you," he growls and I shake my head, sighing.

"He visited me because he's one of my best friend Roxas! Please tell me you didn't hurt him," I ask, genuinely worried for the health of my friend and Roxas shrugs his shoulders.

"He's got two black eyes, but the swelling probably went down…I got him on Wednesday," he replies with a shrug and I feel a chuckle pass my lips.

"You're unbelievable," I say and he smiles at me, leaning over and kissing the tip of my nose sweetly making my stomach twist.

"So uhm, the party was rescheduled and it's on Sunday at Riku's, you still coming?" he asks and I shrug not really sure if I want to be in that house. I don't know how these popular types can just forget about the horrible things they all do to each other so easily.

"If you don't want to that's alright…we can go on a date instead?" he says softly and I blink a few times before smiling brightly. He just asked me out on a date.

"Sure, I'd love to," I say and he chuckles shooting me a glare.

"You're turning me into a sap Martinez," he grumbles, leaning over and kissing me on the lips softly, pulling away and just staring at my face. I shift on the bed a little uncomfortably because he's so close, he can see everything on my face and I don't know…I just feel so strange. "But you know what?" he asks, still close enough for me to feel his breath fanning over my lips as I shake my head, "I don't mind so much, crazy isn't it?" he straightens up and looks at me, his eyes filled with this odd warmth I've never seen in them and it makes me feel fuzzy on the inside.

"So…does this mean you like me?" I ask pathetically and he just chuckles, picking his helmet up off the floor and looking at his wrist watch.

"Yeah, it does," he says and sends me a smile before telling me I should get some rest because it's late. He kisses me good night and leaves me there lying in the hospital bed.

I'm actually really tired but the excitement of having him admit to liking me keeps me awake a while longer.

Roxas Anderson actually likes me.

* * *

**A/N:** Ahh Nosemilk (:

Horrible flash back in the begining...I'm sorry v___v  
Oh and here's the translation:

"Mi hijo, despiértate…"  
English: My son, wake up

"Q-Que pasa papa?"  
English: W-what's wrong dad?

"Nada mi hijo,"  
English: Nothing my son.

"¿M-mi mama?"  
English: M-My mom?

"Se fue a la casa de la tía por el fin de semana…"  
English: She went to your aunt's for the weekend

"¿Que están haciendo?"  
English: What are you both doing?

"¿T-tío…que…que haces?"  
English: U-Uncle...what...what are you doing?

"Quédate quieto niño,"  
English: Stay still boy

"N-No me gusta,"  
English: I don't like it

"Déjenme, salgan de mi cuarto!"  
English: Leave me, get out of my room!

"Cállate!"  
English: Shut up/Be Quiet

"N-No mas, por favor…no papa,"  
English: N-No more, please...no dad.

Atleast Roxas finally comes around.

Good.

Thanks for reading (:


	13. The Burning Of The Headboard

**Chapter Thirteen: The Burning OF The Headboard**

Getting home after being in the hospital for a while is always weird, it feels like something should have changed drastically but nothing really has. I mean, the couches are all in front of the TV still, the kitchen still has the same tiles and over all, it's exactly the same as it's been since we moved in. I don't know why I'd expect to see anything else but I always do anyways, maybe it's just me, I don't know…I'm just insane.

Kairi is sitting on the couch when we walk in, Reno taking my bags to the room and telling me Aerith wants to see me later today, and that he's driving me there. I don't really have enough energy to care, I just want to lie in bed and fucking vegetate, those hospital beds are like sleeping on stone. I walk past Kairi, looking at her like I always do when I see her because I might hate her, but deep down inside I really don't, if you can understand what I'm trying to say. I mean, I hate her for everything she's done but it's not one of those hates that's tangled its roots around every one of my vital organs. It's just a hate that's there, bad enough so that you can feel it but not bad enough to make me want to never talk to her again and wish death upon her. Anyway, when I look at her, I notice she's looking at me and there's tears in her big blue eyes, it sort of crushes me for some reason to see her sitting there all teary eyed but I brush it off and walk into my room, I don't want to ask her what's wrong and end up having her tell me that my being alive is what's wrong.

Reno walks out of my room just as I walk in, I look at him and he smiles, "Try and get some rest, I gotta go to the shop, I'll be back to pick you up around 6," he says and ruffles my flat hair before leaving. I hate when my hair is just flat on my head, I usually hair spray the fuck out of it and tease it just to get it to stand the way I like but now, it's just laying there all limp and lifeless. I realize how weird my hair cut is, and how strange my layers are when it's like this, so I tie it back and put my hood on before I lie down on my bed.

I hear Reno leaving and I close my eyes. I feel so weird, I don't know what exactly it is but I feel like something in my chest, something that used to feel void and dark is now all…filled.

Don't go all sappy and think it's because Roxas told me he likes me, because it's not even that.

Or maybe it is.

I'm not really sure, I mean…my entire life after being fucked over by my father and Uncle I've thought of myself as this disgusting creature that no one would ever love, I've believed it for so long. I mean, Kairi proved to me that even my family could be repulsed by me and at school everyone fucking hates my guts, I thought that I was right. Then Roxas comes along, and sure at first it was fucked up, but now…he likes me. It's really fucking with my head and I don't understand any of it, I mean, why would Roxas Anderson like me? He knows what happened, he knows how I am and yet…he's texting me right now.

I get up and grab my phone, flipping it open and reading his message as I throw myself back onto my bed.

"_Hey, can I come over?" _

I read it a few times, and furrow my eyebrows because, since when does he ask for permission? He usually is all tough and manly and like,

_"Bitch Imma come to yo house, wetha you like it oh nawt."_

Okay, yeah, he's never talked to me like that but I can hear it in my head.

I reply, telling him to come over if he really wants and he says he'll be here soon. I toss my phone onto the carpet and hear my door quietly creak open. I shoot up in my bed because after what happened that night, I just can't feel comfortable when my door creaks open. I see a small head of red hair peak in, and my breath catches in my throat when I see Kairi step into my room. She closes the door softly and walks over to me and just drops beside my bed. I look down at her, there's tears drying on her face and more forming in her eyes. My chest feels hollow and my heart…well, it sort of breaks to be honest with you. I clench my jaw shut though, and sit up, scooting away from her and giving her a cold look because before being my sister, she's that bitch Kairi that tried to ruin my life at school by telling people lies, she's that bitch that blames my past on me.

"Get the hell out of here," I hiss and she just shakes her head, sniffling. I hear her mumble something, something quiet and she says it with her face pressed into my comforter. "Kairi, what the hell are you saying?" I ask roughly and I watch her shoulders shake crazily before she lifts her head and looks at me, I can see her world ending in her eyes and that is something terrifying. I'm telling you, you never want to be able to see someone's life crumble in their eyes…it's a horrible experience, being able to see all that raw emotion. I wish for a moment that she would have hidden that.

"You…you wouldn't have said that…t-to me when we were younger," she hiccups, rubbing the mascara away from her eyes viciously and I feel my heart drop to my stomach.

I guess I forgot to mention that Kairi and me…we used to be close. I was her big brother, the one who'd protect her from harm and keep the bad things away. I'd let her curl against me during the night because she was scared of the dark, I'd let her wear my clothes if she was too cold and I'd even let her watch whatever cartoons she wanted in the mornings. That all changed though, the morning I told my mom what my father had done, she attacked him and ended up stabbing him around 6 times before rushing me to the hospital to make sure I was okay. That day all our lives were ruined. I was taken to the hospital, the doctors checked me. It felt all so violating, their gloved fingers prodding and just feeling my shame. When the police went to arrest my father, they found him still alive, holding a pillow against his stab wounds, he told them what had happened and they took my mother away too. We all had to stay with my aunt until Reno turned 18 and he took Kairi and me with him. My aunt didn't fight; she couldn't stand the sight of me.

In Kairi's eyes, I had ruined the family. After that, there were no more Christmas parties, no more Holiday get-togethers in general. Everything ended and the Martinez family fell apart, when our grandparents died no one even called to tell us. Reno found out accidentally because Rude's parents had said something about it and the android ended up giving Reno his condolences, when my brother didn't even know.

"Well…that was then, this is now," I say bitterly and Kairi starts bawling and I mean really crying. Tears are streaming down her face and she's screaming, covering her head and rocking back and forth.

"I'm sorry!" She screams, tugging at her hair, and just dropping onto the carpet on her side, she lays there crying and I just watch because really, there isn't anything I can do right now.

"I'm so sorry Axel!" she sobs, choking on a few tears before sitting up with some difficulty. I look at her when she sits in front of me, her chin quivering and there's even snot dripping out of her nose. I bet she'd die if anyone from school saw her.

"I-I-I know it wasn't your fault…I always knew…I just didn't want to believe it. How could I not know you were telling the truth! The doctors even told us!" she is in absolute hysterics and I'd like to know what exactly brought this all on.

"I just…I always loved dad…he was like a hero to me, and to find out…to find out he was like that…my world crumbled around me Axel…All I wanted was a good family," she looks up at me, her eyes all red and I don't know what to say. So I just keep my mouth shut and look down at my blanket, picking at a loose thread.

"I'm so sorry…" she says quietly and slumps down, hunching over and looking so pathetic. The question is eating at my brain though, the question of why she's doing this all now, why is she apologizing to me now. I decide to ask her, and she looks up at me and maybe it's because I didn't growl or say it angrily. It was just a simple question.

"You were in a coma Axel, I didn't know if you'd ever wake up and…I wouldn't be able to live with the guilt…Reno talked to me…and…I just…I got to thinking," she says yet I can see something else in her eyes, something hidden underneath all the tears and I get scared. I feel fear coiling in my stomach and distrust.

"Are you sure that's the entire reason?" I ask and she looks away like she knows I saw through her lie, she stares straight at the wall opposite of her and her eyes develop this sort of far-away look, like she isn't even looking at the wall anymore but something else.

"I'm pregnant," she says quietly and at first, I think I heard her wrong, at first I hope I heard her wrong and when I stay quiet she turns and looks at me, that far-away look still in her eyes and she looks the saddest I've ever seen her. "And he doesn't even want anything to do with me," she says and I don't know what to do. She's my sister yet I feel the hate still there, like a blanket thrown over me muffling her words and not letting me care as much as I probably should.

"I just had to apologize to you, I couldn't have my conscience chasing me forever," she says and gets up walking out of the room and shutting the door softly. I stare at it for a long time wondering just what in the hell that whole scene was about. She sounded like a woman on her deathbed, correcting all her wrongs just in time for her death and for some reason that scared me just a little. I'd have to tell Reno about Kairi's weird behavior.

I feel my phone vibrate and I look down at it, flipping it open and reading the message.

"_Open your god damned door, there is an old lady across the hall trying to get in my pants," _

I smirk as I get off the bed, shoving Kairi into the back of my mind, realizing that I still hate her and probably always will. She's pregnant and it's her own damn fault. I make my way towards the front door, opening it and finding Roxas, smiling awkwardly as my neighbor pinches his cheeks and tells him how adorable he is, and asking if he's positive about not wanting that candy she has in her bedroom. I disguise my chuckle with a cough and Roxas bolts into my house, telling me to close the door _now_ before she comes in. I shut the door and he lets out a long sigh, tossing his head back and drooping his shoulders. I smile at him and he glares as he takes his shoes off.

"Asshole! I was knocking and knocking and you wouldn't open. I told you I was coming over," he says and he has this cute little angry pout, I walk over and just hug him, shutting him the hell up because sometimes…he talks too much.

"Mart-mmph," his voice is muffled by my sweater as I press his head a little harder then necessary against my chest. I actually did want to shove my sweater in his mouth, just to make sure he shuts up.

"Just shut up Roxas," I say and walk him towards my room, still holding him against me so you can imagine how awkward that was, I was walking forward trying not to step on him, and he was walking backwards trying not to trip on his own feet. We sort of wobbled into my room, toppling over once his knees hit my bed, I land on top of him and he grunts, squirming a bit from under me.

"Why are you being so weird?" he asks, his voice a little strained from all my weight crushing his stomach so I prop myself up on my forearms and look down at him.

"What do you mean?" I ask and he raises an eyebrow at me, looking at me like I've smoked one too many crack rocks.

"I don't know…you've been weird since I met you really but now…you're extra weird,"

"Just shut up Roxas," I say, leaning my head down and hiding my face in the crook of his neck. I really don't know what came over me but I just want more then anything to be held right now. Roxas squirms a bit before wrapping his arms around me, running his hands up and down my back soothingly. "If you don't stop that, I'm gonna fall asleep," I grumble, nuzzling my face deeper into the fabric on his shoulder and he chuckles softly, his hands stilling their movements and just resting on me. He keeps squirming so I pull away and look at him; he stops and looks back at me.

"Stop moving so much," I say and he smirks, squirming harder for a second before he stops and wraps his arms around my neck pulling my face towards his until our lips connect, my arms feel like jelly for a second until I remember that I can't let them give out because I'll fall flat onto Roxas and crush him so I brace myself and kiss him back.

Quicker then usual our kiss gets pretty intense, his hands sliding up and under my shirt, his thin cold fingers running along my skin and making me shiver as I bite his lip, pushing my tongue into his mouth and we fight for dominance, which is usually a lot harder. I win easily and instead of questioning it, I enjoy the fact that I'm in charge. I hear him moan from under me, my mind sort of blanks out, my hands grip his sweater and I tug it off his head, he plops back down onto my pillow and I must say…I really like the way his hair fans out on my pillow.

"I came here to talk, but this is just as good," he breathes, a smirk on his face and I roll my eyes, leaning down and biting his neck.

"Shut up, Roxas," I say again and he chuckles, before it's cut off with a moan as I suck harshly on the spot I just bit. He arches up into me, pressing his lithe figure against mine, I can feel the muscles in his stomach, nice and tense press against mine from under the thin t-shirt and I shudder at the feeling. I pull away from his neck just as he rips my sweater and t-shirt off in one movement, my eyes widen as the room's cold air hits my bare torso full force and I glare down at Roxas, him and his t-shirt covered body.

"Gotta be quicker then that, Martinez," he laughs like the dumbass he can be and I tug his shirt over his head, our skin touches and I think I go blind for a second because it just feels so good to have his smooth, warm skin pressed against mine. He grabs my shoulders as I kiss his neck, my lips softly leaving a trail along his collarbone and he groans when I pull away, sitting on my knees in front of him. I stare at his jean button and he props himself up and looks at me, smirking. He licks his bottom lip and I watch him curiously until he drops back onto my pillow and runs his hands down his stomach slowly arching into his own touch, feeling his muscles and I watch, my mouth going dry as he moans softly, his hands stopping right at the button on his jeans, his fingers playing with it for a moment before he pops it open. My breath hitches as he tugs the denim down, shimmying out of them and he's left in his weird little boxer briefs though he looks so damn good in those.

I blink when he sits up and grabs my pants, unbuttoning them quickly and looking up at me while he undoes my belt.

"I really hope your brother isn't home," he says and I just shake my head, looking at the clock that reads 4:30pm. Reno won't be back for a while. "Good," Roxas breathes and pulls my pants down a little; I watch this all and I'm not quite sure what to do since I'm on top of him instead of the other way around. Roxas pauses and looks up at me, his eyes widen a second before he lets out a long breath and laughs, shaking his head.

"You're such a virgin," he says and I raise an eyebrow, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Oh and this is a bad thing?"

"No, no don't get so testy," he laughs at his own pun and I feel like smashing my face into the wooden headboard of my bed. Its weird how I still sleep on a bed with a headboard…maybe I should burn it…that could probably help me bury all my demons. It could be symbolic, the burning of my headboard.

I shoot up off the bed and pull it away from the wall, Roxas is jostled forward and he spins around looking at me like I'm insane.

"What the hell are you doing!" he shouts and I look at him with this crazy smile, rushing out into the hallway towards the closet to get the screw driver. I run back into my room and drop onto my knees right beside my bed, stabbing it into the screws and starting the job of getting rid of my headboard.

"I'm all about silence, but don't you think taking the headboard off is a little extreme?" Roxas says with a smirk and I look up at him blankly, blinking a few times and he slides off the bed, landing beside me and just looking at me. He places his hand over mine and stops it from moving. He suddenly looks serious.

"Axel, are you alright?" he asks quietly and I stare at my shaking hands, realizing the metal of the screw driver is clanking against the headboard's joints.

"I need to burn this," I say and look at him dead serious, feeling tears forming in my eyes and he seems sort of confused. "I have to burn the headboard, I have to get rid of it," I go back to unscrewing it and Roxas reaches for one of the shirts on the floor, it's mine I notice from the corner of my eye but he slips it on anyway. He stands up and goes to the door.

"Do you have another screw driver?" he asks and I nod telling him where it is and a few minutes later he's at the other side of the headboard, helping me remove it.

We get it off and right away I feel like a weight has been lifted off my chest, I slide it away from the bed and Roxas pushes the bed back up against the wall. I look at it as I hold up the headboard and I know I'll be able to sleep on the bed now that it's gone. I won't have any more night mares. I'll be able to lay with Roxas on it without feeling filthy.

I start dragging the headboard out of the room, and suddenly it gets a lot easier, I look up and see Roxas helping me with a little smile on his face. I look at him wide eyed but don't say anything as we carry the head board out of the room and out of the apartment.

We drag it all the way outside, and I feel the cold air nipping at my bare torso, my pants sliding further down my hips as we drop it right by the dumpster. I look around and see no one; I grab Roxas' hand and rush towards our apartment's garage. I know Reno keeps gasoline in there and it's always unlocked. We stop in front of the garage, the number 1308 over the door and I bend over, lifting it. Once the door is secured and in place I walk into the garage and grab the gasoline and the camping lighter, though it really is just a miniature flame thrower, that's hanging on a hook and we rush out of the garage, the door slamming shut behind us.

I stand in front of the headboard, just staring down at it then start pouring the gasoline all over the wood, Roxas just watches me silently and I hand him the jug of gas after I'm done. He steps back a few feet and I light it. Immediately it goes up in flames, the maple wood burning away to nothing slowly before my eyes. I can hear my 12 year old screams, disguised in the cracks and pops of the fire. I watch the smoke that's carrying with it, all the terrors.

Roxas comes up beside me and slips his hand into mine, lacing out fingers together and we just watch the wood burning. I look down at him and realize that he looks mesmerized by it.

"Thanks," I say and look down at his tiny feet, his toes curled against the cold pavement even in his socks and his pale legs are covered in goose bumps.

"Can I ask?" he whispers, still watching the fire eat away at the headboard hungrily. I decide to tell him, letting go of his hand and wrapping my arm around his shoulder, he nuzzles into my warmth, his tiny hands clutching at my sides and I feel the iciness of his fingers.

"I had to burn it…this is like…I can't really explain but I feel that…by burning this, I can start to burn those painful memories…it sounds so dumb out loud," I say and look away, he squeezes me softly and I look back at him a little reluctantly.

"It's not dumb… I get it. You're like…getting ready to recover…finally," he says almost as if he can totally see why I spazzed out in the room in the middle of our make out session. I look at him, staring into his eyes and I feel my heart start pounding crazily in my chest because he isn't looking at me like I'm crazy, he's looking at me like he understands.

I lean down and kiss him, moving my arm from his shoulder and wrapping it around his waist, pulling him right against me and he doesn't even say anything. He just slips right into my arms like he's made to be there, wrapping his arms around my neck and kissing me back softly. It's so damn cliché, but fuck we fit together like two puzzle pieces. I hate clichés and everything but now I understand what those people mean.

"Thank you," I whisper against his lips with my eyes closed, simply sucking in this feeling. I can hear the fire cracking and hissing in the background and I feel at peace. I feel ready to go see Aerith and tell her that today; I'm going to get better for sure. Never again will I punch a hole through her wall; never again will I wake up screaming. I'm almost sure about this.

"No problem Axel…but can we go inside? I swear my dick like shrunk into my body, it's so fucking cold out," Roxas says and I pull away from him and just stare at him. I think I look disgusted and he starts laughing, a bright blush on his face.

"Yeah, in a bit," I say and Roxas groans before clinging to me more then before, whimpering about the cold as I watch the fire slowly shrink, running out of wood to keep feeding it's hunger and we watch it die, just a black, charred piece of barely recognizable wood left in the fires wake.

I race Roxas back inside, obviously he wins and rubs it in my face once we reach the apartment. He walks in and starts rubbing his arms, trying to get the cold off his skin. Surprisingly the cold doesn't bother me much and I lead him back into my room and I plop onto the bed, Roxas following shortly after.

He curls up against me, shutting his eyes and just laying there with his arm thrown across my chest, breathing softly and I roll over, forcing him to roll onto his back as I hover over him. I watch his face as he looks at me, his big blue eyes simply staring, that warmth in them that's still so new to me. I realize how beautiful he is, his features all soft and for once he doesn't look like an asshole or something like he usually does with his almost permanent scowl that alternates into a smirk every now and again. Something in the back of my mind tells me that maybe; I feel something for Roxas that's a little more then just like. He looks at me, and he smiles that genuine smile that knocks the air right out of my lungs every time and I know for sure that I feel something stronger for him. I just don't want to tell him.

"Are you gonna kiss me or what?" he asks and I smile before leaning down and pressing my lips against his, kissing him softly and sliding my hands down his sides, liking the fact that he's wearing my shirt a lot for some reason and soon my palms are touching his still cold thighs, he slides his legs open, creating a little space for me to slip in-between them and I do. I push the material of my shirt up as I kiss him; he wraps his legs around my waist and grinds our hips together, groaning deeply in his throat and right away I know I'm about as turned on as I've ever been.

"Axel," he says softly, pulling away and looking at me, I stare into his eyes and he's smiling as he tucks stray pieces of hair that've fallen out of my pony tail behind my ear. It's an oddly feminine gesture but it's gentle and I feel the caring seeping right into my skin whenever he touches me. "Axel, I don't want us to have sex," he says and I furrow my eyebrows together, feeling his boner pressing into my stomach completely contradicting him.

"Oh," I say before pulling away only to be stopped by him and he wraps his arms around my neck, shaking his head.

"I don't want us to have sex, or fuck…or whatever…I want us to, uhm…to do something maybe that means more then that," he says and the blush burning his cheeks is almost brighter then my hair. I look down at him, catching on to his meaning and I blink a few times.

"Oh…yeah, yeah I want that to," I say and he smiles probably the biggest smile I've ever seen on his face.

"Fuck Axel, I…" and he's cut off with Reno barging into my room, and he just waltz in, walking over to my dresser and throwing it open.

"Yo, do you have that red shirt I wanted," Reno says, looking through the hangers and Roxas looks at him, glaring at his back and I just stay frozen on top of Roxas, his thighs pressing against my skin and Reno turns around when he's met with silence, when he turns around his eyes go huge and his jaw drops.

"Holy shit Axel!" He shouts and Roxas just plops onto the bed, almost like his limbs turned to jelly, letting go of me while I stay on all fours over him.

"Where is your headboard?" Reno continues and I stare at him, eyes wide and eyebrows just so high up on my forehead. Roxas starts laughing, that crazy kind of laugh that's caused by frayed nerves and just insanity. I laugh too, while Reno just looks confused.

"Whatever man, hurry and get dressed. Oh and hey Roxas," Reno says while leaving my room, the red shirt he was looking for in his hand as he shuts my door.

"Your brother is definitely messed up," Roxas say and I look at him, laughing a little still, my heart pounding crazily in my chest.

"He is…but what were you going to say?" I ask and Roxas shakes his head, pushing me off of him and grabbing his pants, sliding them on quickly and smiling at me when I pout as he buttons them. He shifts a little uncomfortably and I realize that's because he had to jam his junk into his tight pants, I swallow the loud laugh that bubbles in my throat.

"Don't worry about it. Get dressed, I'll see you tomorrow," He walks over to me, kisses my forehead and pats my crotch, making me hiss and he laughs loudly.

"Might wanna get rid of that before you leave here," he says and leaves my room, telling me he was coming by around 6:30pm to get me tomorrow night and I just stare at the door when he shuts it.

Why does it always seem like I'm left with a hard-on whenever Roxas walks out on me?

* * *

**A/N:** Nose Milk is close to it's end Kiddies.  
It pains me to say that, but it's true.  
Got a few things to wrap up, and then...ta da!

But there will be a few more chapters, so keep your pants on x]

Sorry this update took so long!  
Now I gotta work on TCaTR  
Urgh v__v

OH AND, BIOLOGY EXAM ON MONDAY D:  
Shiiiiiiiiit.


	14. One Step Forward, A Shit Ton Back

**Chapter Fourteen: One Step Forward, A Shit Ton Back**

I finish buttoning my jeans and picking up my flat iron when I hear my door open behind me. I turn slowly; ready to burn the face of the attacker until I see Kairi walk in with her head down. She looks like she's withering away and deep down inside; I'm concerned for the child. What is going to happen to it? I mean, Kairi is definitely not ready to become a mother, all she cares about is herself at the moment and I'm guessing all teenaged girls are like that. So really, no teenage girl could ever be ready for a child. I start straightening my hair, turning around and away from the girl and just busying myself with my hair. I like to have it perfectly straight before I tease and hairspray it. Straight hair is a lot easier to work with, or to me it seems that way.

"Axel," Kairi says and I hum letting her know I'm listening as I clip a section of hair away from my face and start working on a different part, I notice she's watching me in the mirror and I see that look in her eyes, that look of guilt. I try and brush it off and just listen to her.

"You still hate me, even if I apologized?" she asks and I stop, ignoring the smoke coming off my hair that's trapped between the flat iron's plates. I stare at her reflection and simply think about that. Do I really hate her? I could easily say yes, yes I do hate her. I hate her so much it could make me physically ill, but I don't want to say that because I know it will hurt her. I've never been one for emotional abuse; I'm more of a fists and kicks kind of guy. I think about it, and if I don't want to hurt her, that must mean I don't fully hate her, but I still hate her. I just decide not to answer her, and instead busy myself with my hair, unclipping the straightened section and just fixing a few stray hairs before I switch off the flat iron.

"You do hate me," she says and I turn and face her now, our eyes lock and I wish that I could go back in time and tell her that years from now she'd be apologizing to me because her life is going down the gutter and maybe I'd be able to stop the train wreck that we are now, but I can't do that and I probably wouldn't do it anyway. I wouldn't want to have to fight all those demons again, I'm still fighting so many but there were many, many more.

"I can't just make myself forget, Kairi," I say and pick up my sweater off the bed and she just watches me as I move around my room, going to my dresser and standing in front of the mirror again, grabbing my hair spray and bristle brush. I begin teasing it, making sure I grab certain layers and make them stand before spraying them into place. Kairi just watches me the entire time until I finish and turn to look at her for the third time I think.

"So, you haven't forgotten anything…" she says and I nod my head before looking over her and just staring off into space.

"I haven't forgotten anything, I've been cursed with an impeccable memory," I find it so strange to be talking to her again, to simply be discussing something with her when I used to tell her to fuck off after just one sentence from the girl's lips.

"But I am sorry, you don't know how sorry I am," she says and I shake my head, chuckling lightly to myself. It doesn't matter if she's sorry or not because she's never going to fix all those nights she made me cry myself to sleep, she isn't going to fix all those nights that I would lie in bed blaming myself for everything that had gone wrong with our family.

"I know you are," I slip my sweater on and she starts crying, quietly this time, just simple crystal clear tears streaming down her cheeks and she grabs my arm as I go to walk past her.

"Axel…stop," she says and I look down at her, my eyebrows furrowed as I watch her big blue eyes simply stare right into my green ones. I see worry, mixed with something else and I curse myself for my lack of skill when it comes to reading people.

"What are you saying?" I ask, pulling my arm from her grasp and she shakes her head, grabbing at my arm again and holding it tighter.

"H-he's coming," she says and I stare at her with eyes the size of dinner plates, I feel like someone just slapped me across the face with a brick and Kairi's eyes are watering, pushing more tears out and I look around the room but I'm not sure why. "I-I told him…our address," she finishes and I rip my arm away from her, turning my ashen face to the quivering girl.

"It was too late when Reno talked to me and made me see what I've done! That's why I'm apologizing, I'm apologizing because he's coming back!" she screams and the room is spinning around my head, I fight the urge to just drop into that darkness and I blink the blurriness from my vision, trying to force myself to focus on Kairi and not punch her in the face.

"You told him…he knows I'm here…and now he's coming," I whisper, dropping to my knees and staring up at Kairi as she cries harder then I've ever seen her cry. She drops in front of me, holding her arms out and just sobbing hysterically.

"I'm so sorry Axel; I should have never done any of the things I've done and I know that now. I've learned a lot since finding out about my baby, I've realized I have to change if I don't want to end up alone…I apologized to Sora and Riku, I helped them get back together. I've really changed and I'm so sorry. You can hate me forever but I promise I won't let him hurt you," I swallow and stare at her arms, the empty space in between them where I can slip into and pray to God that I'll be safe. I throw myself into the space and she catches me, wrapping her thin arms around my back and holds me close as I feel my body shake with fear.

"I won't let him hurt you, I promise…I owe you," she whispers into my hair and I shake my head, hugging her tightly but not squeezing her. The baby is quietly growing inside and I feel my hatred dying away with every beat of the tiny human's heart along with Kairi's.

Reno pushes the door open and stumbles over us, he stays silent presumably just watching us until I look up at him, his image fuzzy because of the tears swimming in my eyes and I blink them away, slowly his features sharpen and he kneels right in front of me, staring at us curiously.

"Are you both alright?" He asks, looking over me to where Kairi is and the girl stares back at him, I open my mouth, words bubbling in my throat but the doorbell ringing snaps all of our attentions towards the hallway. My heart begins to beat crazily in my chest and I can swear I feel Kairi's pulse pumping crazily through her as Reno gets up. "Hold up, I gotta get that," he says and walks away, Kairi pulling away from me and scrambling to get up and stop him.

"Reno!" she shouts, tripping and almost falling. I catch her before she hits the floor and we race out into the living room where Reno is standing, the door open and the barrel of a gun pointed directly at his face. Reno is pushed back into the apartment and the door is slammed shut, the figure steps into the bright lights of the apartment and I can see him. My father is standing right in front of me and the scream rips past my lips, Kairi stands in front of me almost as if she's trying to block me from the man and his head snaps in our direction.

"YOU!" he screams and his eyes lock with mine, my knees go weak and I feel my stomach lurch at just the sight of his face. He slams Reno against the wall and storms over to me, making the apartment seem a million times smaller then it really is with how fast he crosses the expanse of our living room. Reno though gets up quickly and tackles the man to the floor, they start wrestling for the gun on the carpet and all I can do is stay frozen on the spot.

"Axel, we have to call the police!" Kairi says and turns to pull me with her into one of the bedrooms. The noises in the living room stop suddenly with a shot of the gun and we freeze just listening with baited breath, my heart pounding so hard I can feel it in my throat and we both stare at the door, waiting. Kairi's hand is stopped mid-air over the cordless phone on my dresser while I stand in front of my bed. I feel my muscles twitching in fear and I look at Kairi from the corner of my eye and she quickly looks at me before shooting a look back at the door.

It bursts open and to our despair it isn't Reno who almost ripped the door off its hinges. My mind goes blank for a second because it's not Reno; Reno is in the living room hurt or even worse.

"Por tu culpa, me comí años en la cárcel!"My father screams at me, lifting the gun and aiming straight at my head. I stare at him, wide eyed and simply frozen, rooted to the floor with Kairi on the other side of the room.

I haven't spoken Spanish in years, even if it's what I was taught at home. I forced it out of my mind after everything that had happened that night; I never wanted to know anything about the language ever again though it had nothing to do with anything. It was just a painful reminder and now to have him here, in front of me and screaming at me in that language… My vision swims and I try hard to stand as he clicks the safety off the gun.

"Te voy a dar lo que mereces," he seethes, tongue dripping venom and I hear the blast of the shot, every one of my senses heightened as I tensed myself, ready to feel the pain burning through me as the bullet forces it way into my flesh, muscle and bone but the pain never comes and I'm left there in silence for a few seconds. I open my eyes and look at my father as he looks down, his jaw hanging open and when I stare down I see Kairi at my feet, crumpled in a heap and blood pouring all around her. She turns her head and looks up at me, her eyes filled with pain but something tells me it isn't from the bullet wound.

"I'm…sorry," she says pathetically and she closes her eyes, my heart tears into shreds as I hear her head thump against the carpet. So this was what she was hiding, this was the other thing I saw in her eyes when she told me she was pregnant, when she apologized the first time, she was apologizing for telling him our address.

I stare down at her, and I'm not a horrible person…I can't even hold a grudge for long even less when it's my sister. I feel tears burn my eyes and I lunge forward without even thinking, throwing myself at my father and curling my fingers around his throat as we fall backwards, the gun sliding away from his grasp as his head hits the floor. I tighten my grip on his neck when he moves crazily from under me, trying to push me off, swinging his fists but I just cling on, my nails digging into his flesh as tears burn my eyes. I hear the hallway door burst open and the tiny apartment is filled with police officers in no time, all of them swarming my house like flies, prying me off my father and lifting the man before forcing him against the wall and cuffing him. Reno stumbles into the hallway, holding his shoulder that's bleeding profusely and when I see him I can't help the strangled cry that comes from my lips. I fall to my knees and cradle my head, rocking back and forth trying to force the image of a fallen Kairi out of my head.

She was really sorry, and I was a complete dick about it.

She cared enough about me to throw herself in the way.

"Axel…the police need to talk to you," Reno says and I lift my head, but I don't really see anything. I close my eyes and curl up tighter, I hear the paramedics coming into the house and rush into my room as Reno picks me up off the floor with some difficulty and carries me out into the living room, dropping me onto the loveseat but I turn towards the backrest and press myself against the soft fabric of the sofa.

He came back and tried to fucking kill me.

He fucking shot Kairi.

Our family really _was _ruined by me and now I can understand why Kairi hated me so much. It was my entire fault that any of this had happened, it was all my fault that he even tried to kill us. I should have known something like this was going to happen though, I mean he was released recently and it was only a matter of time before he would just bounce right back into my life. Go figure it would be when everything was going so well. I feel myself shaking, trembling over and over as the image of Kairi staring at me with those dull eyes burns itself into my brain.

"Axel, please…turn around," I hear Reno's soft voice, I can also hear a paramedic standing behind him, gently telling him he needs to check the man's wound. Reno brushes him off and keeps trying to get me to uncurl myself. I feel anger start bubbling in my stomach for some reason and with every soft poke or tender touch I feel myself getting physically ill. Why is Reno touching me? Can't he see what I've done?

"Get away from me!" I shoot up and scream, I can't really see that well, so I sway a little. I had my eyes shut for so long that now the drastic change from darkness to the bright living room is too much and not enough time to adjust. I push myself off the sofa and past Reno, racing into the kitchen and crash into the counter. I blink furiously and look around for the kitchen drawer where Reno keeps all the kitchen knifes.

I've never really thought about killing myself, but right now nothing seems better then just stabbing a 6 inch blade into my chest. I've always despised people who speak like that though, all their lives they just complain about life and how badly they want to end it. I've complained about life but I've never seriously considered ending it. I mean, I've considered what it would be like to die, I've even fantasized about it but I've never thought about actually taking my own life. What irony, spending years thinking people who commit suicide are idiots and here I am, searching for a knife to fucking kill myself.

My mind clouds over and the only thing I can think about is just fucking ending it all because I can't take this shit any more. I'm never going to be happy, no matter how many damn headboards I burn, no matter how many sessions with Aerith, no matter how many times I tell myself I'm going to be fine.

I haven't been fine since I was fucking 12 years old, what makes now different?

Just because I burnt that stupid, ugly headboard?

That did nothing to hide the scars; it did nothing to stop all this from happening.

"Axel, what are you doing?" Reno asks shakily from the kitchen archway, I hear the paramedic telling him to stay away from me because I'm currently experiencing something Aerith has always told me are panic attacks and I might hurt him, though this feels so much stronger then a panic attack. I pull open the drawer and there they are, glinting in the bright light as I grab one, pulling out the biggest stainless steel blade I can find.

"Now, calm down sir…what are you planning to do?" Now it's the paramedic's voice and I swing around, knife clutched tightly in my fist as I lock eyes with him. My mind lags for a moment because when our eyes meet all I see is Roxas. Roxas is standing in my kitchen?

"Roxas…is that you?" I ask, trying to blink the tears out of my eyes and the blonde standing beside my brother takes a step forward, it's a cautious step and it makes me angry. He thinks I'm going to stab him or something? Does he think I'm crazy? Suddenly the knife becomes heavy and I look down before looking back up. Roxas is right in front of me now, my heart beat is still far too fast, but I don't want to end it all anymore because Roxas is here and it's fine. Roxas is my anchor to reality, when everything gets crazy I'll still have Roxas Anderson to make fun of me and never call me by my first name, I'll still have Roxas and high school hierarchy and nose milk on white lunch tables. I'll still have the things normal teenagers have.

"I'm not Roxas…" the man says and something inside of me snaps because Roxas isn't here to anchor me, I snap because if Roxas isn't here then I have nothing that I'm desperately trying to grasp at, I don't have any more normal high school days, I don't have any more planning with Zexion, I don't have stupid Demyx to make me pass out, I have no lesbian friends, I have absolutely nothing.

I realize that he is way too close to me and I raise my arm, knife pointed right at his chest and he steps back a bit, I take notice of the crowd standing at the kitchen entry.

"Get away from me then," I say and pull my sleeve up, looking down at the thick vein right in the middle. I've memorized the entire saying, the 'down the road not across the street' thing. I want to end up in the morgue after this, not in the hospital being stitched up and given anti-depressants. I want to fucking end up with a toe-tag, bled like a god damned pig.

"Axel don't!" Reno screams, pushing his way past everyone and he stumbles into the kitchen a police officer ready, his hand resting on his gun along with another one. I assume the others are holding my father in the squad car just outside the apartment.

"Why not!" I shout back even if we're a few paces away from each other.

I think back on earlier today and I start laughing, everyone staring at me as I drop to my knees cackling crazily because it's all just too much. I mean, earlier today I was on my bed kissing the guy I've had a crush on since I arrived in this neighborhood and registered myself into that stupid school, the tiny blonde that's kept me sane these past months, earlier this fucking week I was at school enjoying the life of a normal teenager and my past was where it was supposed to be. Why did everything have to catch up with me, why now? I look up from where I'm kneeling and I see Reno, his eyes glassy just like they were in the hospital and I shake my head at him.

"I'll never be normal, I'm always going to be a freak," I say and Reno shakes his head furiously, trying like a mad man to keep his tears inside his eye sockets.

"That's not true Ax! Look at how well you've been doing, you got a boyfriend, your grades are up, you have friends, you've stopped turning to chocolate milk for comfort because you are getting better!" Reno shouts and I stare up at him, I cannot believe he actually picked up on that.

I used to drink chocolate milk when I was smaller, my mother would make it for me every night and I'd be able to sleep peacefully after that but when she was taken away no one made it for me anymore. I started drinking chocolate milk from the box, I'd buy them at the corner store where my Aunt lived, I drank milk all day, praying and hoping it would help me sleep.

"I'm done!" I scream, because I am. Chocolate milk isn't going to help me; nothing is going to fucking help me any more.

I'm suddenly tackled to the floor, I hear the knife sliding across the tiles and when I look up I see the blonde paramedic over me and I just lay there limp. I think he thought I was going to struggle because he looks shocked but I know what happens when you struggle and I'm not really in the mood to do anything now that he's taken the knife from me.

"You look like…Roxas…Roxas fucking Anderson," I whisper quietly, the vision of Roxas slowly calming me down and he scrunches his eyebrows together, a deep frown is where his mouth is supposed to be and he looks so much like Roxas it makes my heart ache. I'm just so tired now.

"We're related," He says quietly and gets off me, lifting me up and leading me out of the kitchen, the police following me as I'm lead somewhere, I simply follow because I have no knife, no gun, nothing. I'll let them take me wherever because I just don't care anymore. I look around, not really recognizing anything as my own and it feels like I'm walking through fog, thick and hard to breathe fog.

I finally notice where he's taking me, and it's towards the back of his ambulance. I stop and turn around, looking at him as he tries to gently push me towards the open doors. "No! You aren't taking me back," I shout, very terrified of being locked up again for months and having to suffer all alone with no one around me.

"You have to come with us to the hospital, okay?" he says talking to me like I'm some bloody infant who won't understand shit, but I'm not a child, I'm almost a grown fucking man.

"No, I don't! I want to stay here," I say, clawing at the air as I'm restrained and forced into the ambulance, there are now three paramedics strapping me to the gurney as I kick my legs furiously and scream out for Reno, telling him to help me because I'm scared and I'm not crazy.

"Axel…please calm down," Reno says from the bottom of the ambulance steps, the other paramedics leaving once I'm secured and Reno stares into the space, I can only see the top of his head because I'm strapped down so tightly.

"Reno…Reno, please don't let them take me! I won't try and hurt myself, please; I don't want to be strapped down, not again!" I say and I struggle, trying to pull my arms free but the leather is a lot sturdier then it looks.

"You have to be, I'll see you at the hospital," Reno says and they go to shut the doors but my shout stops them.

"Reno! Can you please…Call Roxas," I whimper and he finally lets the tears go as they close the ambulance doors, I catch his nod before they are fully sealed shut probably being taken to his own ambulance and the Roxas-Look-A-Like sits down at my side and checks my pulse.

"Can you tell me your name? I need it for these forms," the paramedic says and I just sigh, telling him my name and spelling it out when he asks me too. After that he just asks my address and my house phone number.

"You're a lot calmer, usually people are still kicking and screaming," he says quietly, almost to himself and I nod my head. All my bite is gone and I'm left laying here like I usually am, worn out. This happens way too much, I need to learn to grasp onto an emotion for longer than a few minutes.

I stare up at the car's ceiling, thinking about how many times I've seen the hospital's insides and how sick and tired I am of always ending up strapped to a bed. The thought of killing myself is gone just as quickly as it had come and now I'm left there feeling drained, emotionally and physically. I turn my head and face Roxas Junior…or well, Senior since he's older.

"Do you know what happened with my sister?" I ask and he looks up from his papers and things, focusing on me with his eyes that are _almost_ as blue as Roxas'. My heart twists at the sight and I realize that if I were to die, I'd never see those eyes again and that is something I don't want. It's weird how I know that I can look at Roxas' blue eyes and never get sick of them, I'm not sure if that's love though.

"She's in another ambulance, we'll find out more at the hospital,"

"What about my dad?" I ask quietly, my heart starting up a frantic beat and he tells me to calm down before he answers.

"He's the one they arrested right?" he asks and I nod my head, I hear him shift on his seat before he finally answers. "I think they are taking him to jail, from what Leon said the man was just let out of prison and he was on probation," he says and I raise an eyebrow but realize he can't see it.

"Who's Leon?" I ask and he chuckles at his own mistake.

"He's the officer who pried you off your father; I got to talk to him in the kitchen doorway,"

"Uhm…can I ask you something?"

"Alright shoot," he says and looks at me, I turn my head a little and stare right into his eyes, feeling completely submerged in all the blue.

"Am I really a freak?" I ask and my voice shakes, I don't know why I'm asking him if he doesn't even know me, but for some reason I just need to ask. He looks at me for awhile and the entire time I'm staring right at him, looking into his eyes and watching him. His eyes stay the same, there isn't a shift as if he's trying to hide something, they just stay blue the entire time.

"No, you're just a good kid going through some really bad shit," he says and places a hand on my shoulder, his calloused fingers squeeze tightly and it hurts but I don't want to ruin the moment, I just smile, the familiar prickle of tears behind my eyes so I just close them and lay there silently until something hits me.

"How do you know I'm a good kid? What if I'm a delinquent who's wreaking havoc?" I ask and maybe I am crazy. What else would explain my behavior? One minute I'm going ape shit the next, I'm laying here shooting the breeze with a paramedic. It hurts my head more the just a little bit when I think about my odd actions, but then I remember my firecracker theory and I'm guessing it's like that for the better half of my emotions. A big, explosive bang then the fizzle and dying out stage.

"From what Roxas has told me, you don't wreak much havoc," he says and I can hear the smirk in his voice, I widen my eyes and he just chuckles, "Roxas has talked to me about you, don't worry…they were all good things," he says as the ambulance stops and he gets up, opening the doors and tugging me out. It's really dark out when he wheels me into the hospital, his partner by his side as they sign me in with the nurse. I groan in annoyance after trying and failing to get them to release me from the straps.

Apparently I'm a danger to myself and others without them.

I'm going to become a danger if they don't unstrap me and tell me where Reno and Kairi are.

I groan louder, causing the paramedic to shoot me an annoyed glance that looks an awful lot like Roxas' and I smile a little before tossing my head back onto the too thin pillow and just laying there waiting it out.

Getting back to school on Monday is going to feel surreal but for once, I'm looking forward to it more then anything else. I want to see Zexion, Demyx, Naminé and Larxene…I even want to see Silver Haired Douche Bag, because fuck, they are part of a life that I want, they are a part of the good things I've searched so long for.

Let's just hope they let me out in time.

* * *

**A/N:** BUAHAHAHA

-runs off into the night-


	15. Dawning Of A New Era

**Chapter Fifteen: Dawning Of A New Era**

Monday morning has never looked so beautiful, I've never been as excited as I am today to start a week. I usually despise Monday mornings, in fact I hate every morning but today is different. I pull my blinds up, letting sun shine into my room and everything takes on this wonderful orange glow, the sun slowly climbing up the sky and…well, is appears that happiness makes me a poet. I'll have to share this with my English teacher when I waltz into class.

"For the love of fucking God!" a voice grumbles from behind me and a tiny hand grips the strings, shutting the blinds violently and cutting off the nice, morning glory orange glow leaving my room in a soft darkness.

"Martinez, it's 6:30 in the damn morning, shut the blinds and get back to bed," I stare at Roxas, his hair sticking up everywhere and his eyes still puffy with sleep. I smile brightly at him before wrapping my arms around his waist, squeezing him tightly.

"How can I sleep though, do you know what today is?" I ask and he shoves my arms off him grumpily, grumbling while he picks up the jeans he tossed on the floor when we got home from the hospital.

"It's Monday, and I'm not ready to face the world yet," he says tugging on a blonde tuft while glaring heatedly at me. I smile innocently before reaching over and opening the blinds…again. Roxas hisses, diving onto the bed and covering himself in the blankets. I laugh lightly, jumping in bed after him.

"Oh come on Roxas! Be happy for me," I say and he sticks his head out, glaring at me.

"Happy? Why are you so damned happy?" He asks rubbing his eye viciously and I grip his fist, pulling it away from his slowly reddening eyeball and I hold it between my hands, he looks down at them for a while before looking back up at me.

"Because it's Monday morning and I'm not in a mental hospital," I say like it should have been obvious and Roxas blinks a few times before he finally understands and he smiles, a little lopsidedly but it's still a smile none the less.

"I see your point…well then, I'm happy for you…but really? It's 6:30 am Martinez," and I have to laugh, hugging him tightly before Reno barges in, managing to be just as loud even with a bandaged shoulder and an arm in a sling.

"Stop doing anything inappropriate because I'm coming in!" was his warning before slamming the door against the wall, he's taken to kicking my door open and Roxas just rolls his eyes as the walks in, heading straight for my dresser.

"I'm going to visit Kairi, I'm guessing you'll be going to school then coming by?" Reno says, going through all of my sweaters and destroying any neatness that once lived in my drawers.

"Yeah, I hope she gets…better," I say and Reno looks at me for a few moments before tugging out a green shirt and waving it around as if to show me what he's taking.

"It'll take some time man, but she's moving in with Tia Brenda after she recovers…"

"Yeah, it's for the best," I say and I feel something wet on my shoulder, I quickly look down to find Roxas drooling all over it, his eyes shut as he snores softly. I scrunch my nose in disgust before shoving him off me, causing him to tumble off the bed with a startled yelp.

If you're wondering why Roxas is in my house, why I'm at home and not locked away forever and why Kairi is suddenly moving in with a mystery Aunt, I'll fill you in.

After I was taken to the hospital, I was evaluated by the intake worker at the hospital and I was deemed mentally healthy, or maybe because I sort of made myself appear better then I actually am but that is beside the point. I know I'm better and I'm not going to ever freak out like that again because my father is going back to jail on account of violating his probation. Stupid bastard, I hope he rots in jail…Anyway, after being released and finding Reno with Roxas and his Paramedic family member who I found out is named Cloud, we all were taken to Kairi's room.

She lost the baby, and was pretty torn up about it until I told her that everything between us is cool. It was a sort of 'Not All Is Lost' moment. She smiled at me though there was this emptiness in her eyes. I think it will always be there though; a woman just isn't the same after loosing a child. At least, that's what my aunt said when I talked to her.

Tia Brenda, she appeared from God knows where but she's never had better timing in her life. She is from my mother's side which already makes her a million times better then any human being on the planet. She agreed to take Kairi in, saying how she'd need to be around another woman and have a motherly love. Reno of course complained saying his love was good, but Tia insisted it was for Kairi's well being and well, once she's released she's moving in with my aunt.

Suddenly, I feel a pillow smack right into my face and my trail of though is completely derailed. I look around, eyes wide until they land on Roxas who has in his hand a rather large pillow.

"You were day dreaming," he says, looking at me with a smirk when I shake my head.

"Nuh-uh, I was explaining to the people in my mind what had happened after I was admitted to the hospital," I say with a smirk and he drops the pillow, looking at me like I've lost my mind. He backs away slowly, until he bumps into the wall and he flattens himself against it. To tell you the truth, I have no idea what he's doing.

"Make no sudden movements," he whispers to me or himself, I'm not sure. "The psychotic mind is a dangerous thing, and sudden movements can upset the lunatic…so if we're careful-" I cut him off with a flying pillow, thrown hard enough to crack his skull open…or it would have if it was a brick or something.

"Hey Axel," Roxas says, I hear the front door shut as Reno leaves the apartment, never one to say good-bye or see you later or anything, and while my mind is occupied with that Roxas takes advantage and ends up right in my lap. My eyes widen when I see how close he's gotten and he shoves me back, making me land on the bed with a soft 'omph'. "Reno's gone, and we're all alone," He breathes, the warm air tickling my ear as his lips leave a soft trail of kisses down my jaw. He stops and stares right into my eyes, I feel my stomach twist and I smile.

"Yeah?" I whisper as his lips go back to kissing my jaw and neck, I feel his smirk as his teeth gently graze my sensitive skin and I shudder, my hands gripping his hips as he settles himself more comfortably against me.

I shut my eyes, and my mind simply goes on over drive. I remember everything that's happened to me as of late and really, my life all turned around because Roxas fucking Anderson decided to tell me to be his boyfriend. Remembering that, I pull away from Roxas just as he's about to kiss me and he looks at me, a little irked and more then a little confused.

"Roxas," I say and he raises an eyebrow, bracing himself over me and just staring down at my face. "Remember when you asked me out?" I ask and he chuckles, dropping his head onto my shoulder.

"Yes, why are you thinking of this now?" He grumbles, his lips tickling me over the fabric of my shirt.

"It just feels so weird…having you here and…everything that's happened…it feels like I'm dreaming sometimes, and none of this is real…I feel like I'm going to wake up and you won't be there, and I'll go back to school and everything will be like it was. You won't talk to me, Naminé will be single…Seifer will beat the shit out of me…and…I don't want that," I say and I feel my throat constricting with the urge to cry, Roxas pulls away fully, straddling my hips and he just stares down at me, his blue eyes filled with worry and it's so strange to actually see that there.

"Well it's not a dream, so stop thinking it is. I'm here, Naminé's a dyke and well…Seifer knows he can't hurt you or your little friends," He smiles brightly when I glare at him, I smack his shoulder.

"Seriously Roxas!" I hiss and he tosses his head back laughing loudly, when he finally calms down he looks at me, a warm look in his eyes and it makes my stomach flutter, the blood in my veins speeds up and I feel my toes curl slightly just from that look.

"I am serious Axel! We're going to go to school today and you'll see, everything is real and everything happened and now that it's all over we can finally graduate and leave that damned place."

"We aren't graduating yet," I say with a smirk and he groans, flopping down and laying on me, I wrap my arms around him simply glad to feel him here, and even if I still haven't grasped the reality of everything, even if it might be a dream I'm going to enjoy it.

"Why'd you have to remind me?" he sulks and I smile, squeezing him slightly before sitting up, bringing him with me.

"I live to make your life a wretched place," I say, putting him down and he looks at me strangely, I just ignore it and collect my clothes, deciding that we'd better get ready if we want to get to school on time.

"Anyone ever tell you you're really fucked up?" Roxas asks, slipping on a t-shirt (one of mine) before pulling on his hoodie, he cracks his back while I brush my hair, heating up the flat iron.

"Yeah they have, but I've learned to live with it," I say and send him a smile, he just looks at me before heading out into the living room.

"Roxas!" I call out and wait for him to respond, when he does I smile.

"Make me some chocolate milk!"

**~*~**

"Axel! Where have you been?!" has Demyx always been this loud or is today a special exception for his loudness? And where the hell is Zexion?

"Demyx, I'll explain to you later alright…where is Zexion?" I ask and everyone goes quiet, Roxas sort of stands there with his arms crossed over his chest and glaring heatedly at everything because since we arrived at school everyone is just staring at us weirdly. I'm sort of used to it, but they all seem to be staring at Roxas a lot more then usual. Demyx is avoiding looking at him at all costs, acting as if he isn't even there and Larxene keeps smirking at him like she knows something.

"He's at the library," Demyx says and I notice something is bothering him. God damn it, I miss a few days of school and already everything's changed and gone to the shits? Really?

"Come here Demyx," I grip his wrist and motion for everyone, especially Roxas, to stay where they are while I lead Demyx outside into the cool air. Winter is fading away to spring time and I find it very fitting really. You know, since spring is the time of rebirth and all that other faggoty ass nonsense.

Anyway, I remembered that I had a lot of things to clear up with Demyx. The moment our eyes meet, he sort of looks away and shuffles making the fact that I'm still holding his wrist a million times more awkward. I let him go quickly and I clear my throat.

"Listen Demyx…about what happened…" I start not really knowing where I'm going until he looks at me with a small smile.

"Hey, don't worry about it. I'm over it now," he says with a slowly widening smile, "Naminé talked some sense into me…it's just now…Zexion knows that I liked you and he's being all weird," Demyx says and bites his bottom lip, his eyes showing the deep worry he holds for Zexion. I look at him, my brain trying to come up with some sort of plan to help them.

"Well, look what the cat dragged in," God damn it, really? _Seifer?_

"Go away," I growl not even turning to acknowledge the trio that is undoubtedly standing right behind me, being as obnoxious as I remember. Really, why is everything feeling so far away, like I've missed so much when really I haven't missed that much?

"Is that anyway to treat your buddy!" Seifer asks and I really do hate him, I realize it more and more especially when I turn to look at him, him with his stupid beanie and ugly face. God, how I want to punch him sometimes…or well, all the time.

"Seriously Seifer, leave me alone…I'm not in the mood to deal with you," I see Demyx sort of side step, trying to get closer to the door because even if Seifer hasn't beaten on us lately, it's very probable that he will.

"That's a shame, especially when I was so keen on coming here and roughing around, you know for old time's sake," and I notice all of them slowly closing in on us. I look around and Demyx seems to be shitting bricks, he's never been one to fight or do anything violent or confrontational and I really am not feeling up to defending both of us but I have no choice, clearly.

I get into my fighting stance, and Seifer does the same, hollering like an over heated monkey or something before lunging at me and taking me down. My back hits the ground with a harsh thump and I'm momentarily out of air, as soon as I can breathe again I throw a punch trying to hit him but only skimming his cheek. I hear Demyx shouting, and I look up to see Rai holding him, I try and shove Seifer off me but I can't and he pins me to the ground.

"It's been too long!" he says, leering at me as I squirm trying to get him to let go of me.

"Any new scars?" he says and surprisingly it doesn't bother me as much as it would have a few weeks ago, instead I buck him off me and end up sitting on his stomach. I smirk down at him and he seems confused for a few seconds before realizing that yes, I totally did just reverse our positions.

"Not on me, but you'll definitely have some when I'm through," I say laughingly, before aiming a hard punch right to his face, I only manage to stay on him for a few seconds before he tosses me off and I'm sort of glad Demyx is here to keep Rai busy or else I'd be getting my ass kicked even more by now. Although he isn't really doing anything, he's keeping that neanderthal busy at least.

The back door opens and when I manage to get a look I see Roxas' brother Sora and he does not look pleased at all.

"Seifer, just because Roxas can't get to you, doesn't mean I can't," and Seifer gets off me, quickly but not before kicking me one last time. To my surprise Sora comes over and helps me up, glaring at Seifer all the while. No one has ever picked a fight with Sora now that I think about it and it's so weird to see Seifer actually swallow his tongue, but I'm glad for it. Maybe Sora is like a ninja assassin or something.

"You are so dead," he says, eyes narrowed in a way that seems to promise death and he leads Demyx and me back into the school.

"Sora…what did you mean Roxas can't get to him?" I ask the first question that popped into my head as Sora hides in the corner with us. What I should have asked was why he was outside in the first place or why he even cares. He looks around before answering me.

"Roxas…dropped out of our group and now he doesn't have one so…you know how this school works, if you don't have a group or something you're a complete loser," Sora looks up at me a little sadly and my eyes go wide, I cannot believe a word I'm hearing. "So now it's not the same with out him and Seifer is gonna start beating on you guys again…I just can't stand it! I hate these damn groups," Sora growls, crossing his arms over his chest and I feel the wheels in my head turning, before an idea finally burrows its way into my head.

"Why don't we just break them apart then? We can break apart your group which really is the head of all this…and then, there won't really be this damn hierarchy anymore," I say with a shrug and Demyx looks like he's about to have an aneurysm.

"We can't do that! How are we supposed to get the groups apart anyway Axel? You've been fucking with the system long enough, just deal with it for a while longer. Besides, we're graduating soon and all this won't matter," Demyx says just as the warning bell goes off and Sora looks around before smiling at me.

"I'll see what I can do…lunch won't ever be the same again!" he says before running off, disappearing into the masses of students now heading to homeroom.

"Demyx, I was born to fuck with the system," I say with a bright smile and he just laughs, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and tugging me towards the gym.

"Ah, what would we do without you Axel…" He says softly, stopping just at the doors and looking at me. I smile at him, remembering the times I've spent with him and really, I wouldn't trade what we have for anything in the world.

"Demy…are you sure everything is fine between us?" I say and he just laughs, smacking my arm a little roughly but he's always been a big brute.

"Yeah dude, it's just Zexy I'm worried about now…he won't talk to me," Demyx says sadly and I smile, gripping his shoulder.

"We'll fix this, I just know it," I say and he raises an eyebrow at me.

"Whatever happened to you is freaking me out…but I like it," he says before waving himself off and rushing to class. I watch him disappear before turning and heading into the gym.

"Martinez! Get your ass in the locker room, we ain't waiting for you all day!" and I've never actually thought that hearing the coach would make me smile, but it does. I stop in front of the changing room door and glare at him, only my smile sort of contradicts the look.

"It's Axel! A-x-e-l or what, can't you read?" I shout before rushing into the room. I just know I'm in for hell this morning.

I wouldn't have it any other way though.

**~*~**

Lunch is fucking mayhem. There are people everywhere and the main cause of this is Sora, sitting at my table along with Silver Haired Douche and a few other of the popular kids. I slide into my place beside Roxas who seems just as confused, though Sora is happily chewing on his sandwich. Riku looks a little out of place and I smirk at him. My seat is directly across from his.

"What the hell is going on?" Roxas asks, leaning close to whisper in my ear and Sora glares at him.

"Roxas, it's rude to tell secrets," the brunette scolds and Roxas glares at him before asking the question out loud. Sora laughs maniacally and I briefly wonder what monster I have created.

"We've defeated the system Axel! There are really no more groups left, or well no more original groups! It is the dawning of a new era!" Sora cackles and I sort of blink a few times, my head craning around the cafeteria to see that he's actually right. The other popular kids, the ones who aren't sitting with us, are sitting at other tables seemingly associating with a few other people and the ones at our table are quietly talking amongst themselves. Demyx looks horrified.

"How'd you do it?" I ask finally, and Sora seems so damn proud of himself.

"I just gathered my friends and sat here, telling them the truth. I'm sick of these damn groups and if they didn't want to come with me that's fine, because I'm not taking part in this stupid thing anymore," Sora says looking at Riku happily. Just to think, they were fighting like mad a few days ago…Kairi really did patch things up marvelously.

"The smart ones joined me at this table, the others just left. Now here we are, greeting the spring with new friends and a new perspective!" Sora shouts and Riku groans, smacking his face into the table top. I try and hide my laughter, reaching into my bag and pulling out some chocolate milk.

I'm getting better but it doesn't mean I won't drink milk anymore. I love it too much.

"Sora…you really only changed the seating arrangements, everything else is the same," Riku says, tilting his head away from the table and scrunching his nose.

"Doesn't matter, people are confused and that's all that matters. If it goes back tomorrow at least I know I won't be sitting there anymore, right Ku?" Sora smiles at Riku in a way that I know he won't be able to disagree because hell, if he smiled at me like that I'd do his bidding too.

Riku doesn't answer, instead he sniffs the table and gags.

"Why the hell does this smell like milk?" he says and that's it.

I spray a few people with my nose milk and Riku looks like he wants to punch me while Sora looks like he's stuck between laughing and puking.

"Here we go again," Roxas groans and I laugh loudly, nuzzling my nose into his cheek.

Yeah, here we go again.

**~*~**

Finding Zexion is damn hard, especially when you're in a rush to go home and aren't really looking properly. Roxas laces his fingers through mine and tugs me away from the bathroom door.

"I really think you should mind your own," he says, leading me towards the school exit though my eyes are still scanning around for Zexion. I can't have him and Demyx not talking, that is one change I will not accept.

"I need to help him patch things up with Demy, it was my fault after all," I reply, stopping when I see a head of periwinkle hair. I feel like squealing from the sheer joy and before Roxas can say anything I'm tugging him towards a quietly reading Zexion.

"Zexy!" I shout and he looks up at me, he seems taken aback first then he smiles and gets up. He hugs me which really throws everything off and I stare at him, blinking owlishly.

"I'm glad to see you're alright," he says and I smile almost distracted from my real purpose.

"Why aren't you talking to Demyx?"

"What gives you the impression that I'm not on speaking terms with him?" He seems genuinely confused which is a first, and I feel like it to Demyx to get the wrong impression.

"Demyx said you guys aren't talking and you weren't there this morning or during lunch…" I let my sentence trail off and he pinches the bridge of his nose.

"I've been very busy with a few ISU's and other projects, I explained this to Demyx. I was doing research in the library this morning and at lunch I couldn't find you. The entire cafeteria was in disarray," he scrunches his eyebrows together before putting his book away and slipping his bag onto his shoulder. We being walking towards the parking lot, and I'm still not convinced.

"Are you guys together?" I ask and he sort of hesitates before answering.

"I would like it if we were but Demyx has a few things he has to figure out. Don't worry about us Axel, I'll make sure any misunderstandings are cleared," And I'm so glad Zexion is smart and patient or else he might have never even befriended any of us in the first place.

"That's great. I'll see you at lunch tomorrow right?" I ask and he nods, explaining how he won't see us in the morning but definitely at lunch. We wave him off and head towards Roxas' SUV and that's when I remember what Sora said.

"Why did you stop sitting with your friends?" I ask and Roxas stays quiet as we climb into the car and he starts it up. "Roxas?" I press and he looks at me before taking a deep breath.

"I told you before how I don't care about rankings and what not at school. I finally expressed myself and moved away from those people, your friend Naminé asked if I wanted to sit with her during lunch and well, here we are," he merges into a different lane and I watch as he drives towards my apartment complex.

"Why though?"

It takes him a long time and when he decides to answer we're parked in front of my building. He pulls the keys out of the ignition and gets out. I'm really confused but I get out too and follow him towards the elevator. The entire trip, from the lobby to my front door is silent and even as we walk into my house he's quiet.

"Roxas, are you okay?" I finally ask as I drop my school bag onto the floor, he does the same and sits on the bed, patting the place beside him and I just sit there. This is really weird, I won't lie and I'm a bit more then confused but I guess I'll wait for him to say it.

"I don't really know why…I was just fed up with it and school's ending soon and…Axel, are we going to be together after we graduate?" He asks and turns slightly to look at me, I can't really see anything of help in his blue eyes and I'm not really sure how to answer his question. "I got a scholarship and I'm going to university and that got me thinking. You remember when I said high school isn't a big deal and it's the real world people need to worry about?"I nod my head, and for some reason I'm worried about where this conversation is going.

"Well…I'm going to the real world and I don't want to just…have you forgotten in the rubble of memories that'll be high school once it's all over. I don't…Fuck…Martinez, I don't want this to end because…well I think I'm in love with you."

* * *

**A/N:** Ahh, Nosemilk nears its completion.  
This took me like 2 hours to post because FFnet was being difficult along with Peter (my computer)  
Grrr.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this and stay tuned for the final chapter(s).  
(:


	16. The End Zone

**Chapter Sixteen: The End Zone**

I sit there simply staring into space, my mind completely wiped clean of any thought and I have no idea what I'm supposed to say. I blink a few times and feel a soft touch on my cheek; I turn my head and look at Roxas. He smiles softly at me, it's a little awkward smile but I can tell he's really trying to keep it there.

"Wow," is all I can force past my lips, my throat's gone dry and my brain isn't working up to par all of a sudden. I decide that unless I want him freaking out I have to show him that I'm not disgusted or something, so I grab his face and kiss him. I mean, really kiss him. It's a hard kiss and it hurts a little at first but Roxas shifts his position, and tilts his head giving me more space and better access.

I end up on all fours, hovering over Roxas as we both pant trying to get air into our lungs. Roxas grips the hem of my shirt, I look down at him and I remember exactly were I'd been in this position before.

"Axel," and the way he says my name makes my arms go weak, I sort of topple over, almost crushing him and our noses are centimeters apart. I feel his breath on my lips and when my eyes focus they lock with his.

"Yeah?" I ask because I'm not sure if he's just saying my name or calling out to me or something, I feel his smile against my lips and I blush, knowing I said something stupid or at least it seems that way. He nudges his nose into mine and I lift my head, his eyes are dark and his cheeks are flushed; the sun filtering through the blinds provides enough light for me to see it which means Roxas can see my blush. Damn it, fuck fuck fuck.

"Why are you blushing?" he asks and I groan, before hiding my face in the crook of his neck. He chuckles before pulling me away and making me look at him again, his small hands are warm against my even warmer cheeks and I grin at him, trying to smush the embarrassment. "Do you know how much I want you?" he whispers hotly, pressing his lips against mine and prying them apart with his tongue, I won't lie, that statement caught me off guard and all I can really concentrate on is the way his tongue is moving inside my mouth. My body is tingling all over and my stomach feels like someone's holding a match to the bottom of it. My hands are kind of useless, seeing as I'm using my forearms to keep me up. I sort of have his head trapped in between my arms and I think it's kind of cute, but I'm not sure why.

When he pulls away my chest hurts, my lungs have probably shriveled down a few sizes and I feel kind of dizzy. I'm not really sure if it was the kiss or lack of oxygen that did it though.

His fingers push away a few strands of hair that at some point fell into my face and he tucks them behind my ear. I look at him curiously, because he is being so gentle it's sort of odd to tell you the truth. When I look at him though, all he does is smile. It this blinding smile, so dazzling I think I've seen Heaven's gates or something. My heart swells and I smile back, I know my own smile isn't as beautiful as his but I think he at least deserves a smile or something.

He pushes me up and makes me sit back on my own legs; he rises and kneels in front of me on the bed. I feel my spit slowly gliding down my drier then the damn desert throat; his eyes stay on mine the entire time and when I feel his hands touch my stomach I sort of jump back. He laughs at me, which makes me kind of angry so I grab him and pull him flush against me, wrapping my arms around his waist and holding him so that every part of us is touching. His hands begin moving upward inching my shirt off bit by bit and when he reaches my chest I know I have to let go. I do and soon my shirt is gone, thrown off to who knows where. He looks down, I can feel his eyes all over my chest and I blush from head to toe, it's just so embarrassing for someone to look at you, especially when you don't have all your clothes on. I mean, no matter what it is, it's embarrassing for them to see you, or at least I think like that. I don't like anyone seeing any thing on me that could be covered. Well except for my face, neck and hands but those aren't really strange body parts. Now feet…those are…

"Aah," the gasp completely ruins my train of thought, and I'm gasping because Roxas just slipped his hand into the front of my jeans, his thin fingers rubbing me gently over the fabric of my boxers. If I wasn't hard before, I definitely am now.

"Stop day dreaming," Roxas whispers hotly in my ear and I nod dumbly reaching for the edge of his shirt with trembling fingers, I manage to grip it and tug it up, he has to slide his hand out of my pants though to take it off but he does that quickly. The loss of contact makes me want to groan but I don't because that would be weird and uncalled for, or would it?

Now it's my turn to stare, and stare I do. Roxas' body could be compared to a God or something. It's so perfect I can barely describe it without sounding like I'm talking about a Christmas ham or something. I mean, I could use words like soft and sweet, or firm and succulent but really I won't. He has the flattest stomach I've laid eyes on, with just enough definition to let you know he can most likely kick your ass. My eyes go all the way down to the waist band of his boxers that are sticking out just above his jeans which hang really low on his hips.

"Like what you see?" he says and I'm pulled out of me reverie, he chuckles before wrapping his arms around my neck and it's then that I notice the coolness around my thighs. When I look down I see the cause of it, my jeans are unbuttoned and pooling around my knees. I blush really hard then because when I had sex with Roxas before it was pitch black in the room and he was so drunk I don't think he really knew what the hell was going on, but now his little sober eyes are drinking up every inch of bare skin and fuck, I have no idea why this is so embarrassing.

"Common, lay down," he says softly and we shuffle slightly on the bed so that I can lie down, and he finishes tugging off my pants before unbuttoning his own jeans and kicking them off. He crawls onto me and stays there for a while, simply staring at me and I swallow not quite sure what to do.

This is where I realize that I should have watched more porno in my lifetime; I should have read books or something about sex because I am a complete fucking douche bag when it comes to anything bed related.

I feel a smack on the side of my head and I blink owlishly until I realize Roxas is glaring at me.

"What's a guy got to do to keep your attention?" he asks, leaning forward and connecting our lips together. I inwardly answer, that this…right here, well this can keep my attention just fine.

He finally seems to decide that kissing isn't cutting it for him and he grinds his hips down into mine, the thin fabric of our boxers does nothing to hide each of our excitement and I arch my back, trying my hardest not to moan but Roxas seems to have no problem. He moans right against my lips, and I feel his fingernails digging into my sides. His hands begin sliding downwards and soon they're tugging my boxers off. My face flushes all over and I'm stuck between wanting to push him away and letting him continue. He pulls away alone, though his hands are still holding the waist band of my boxers.

"Axel, let me know if you want to stop," he says and I nod my head, he smirks at me and leans down, our chests touching and the heat of his skin is the finishing touch. I reach over and tug his boxers down as best as I can. Fuck, I know I'm not going to tell him to stop; I've never been able to before, so why am I going to say that now? I mean…he just told me he loves me and…Oh fuck.

By the time I stop day dreaming as Roxas would say, we're both completely naked and he straddles my hips, sitting comfortably just above my damn dick and I can feel it pressing against his ass and I just want to hump him which is sort of weird and I'll never say that out loud…ever. I look up and see Roxas biting his bottom lip looking a little torn between something.

"What's wrong?" I ask and he shakes his head before leaning towards my night stand and grabbing my hand lotion. Why he decided to moisturize his fingers at this point in time I will never know…Oh wait, oh fuck. My brain turns to jelly now and I'm so ready to feel his fingers pushing into me but I don't. I feel a bit of the cream touch my cock but then I see something that will probably stay in the back of my eyelids for the rest of my life. Which later on will pose as a problem, seeing as writing an exam or something will be extremely difficult when all I can see is a naked Roxas whenever I close my eyes.

Roxas slipped two of his fingers into himself, his thigh muscles tense and he throws his head back. I just watch him work, completely entranced by him as he stretches himself out, my hands by their own accord end up on his chest, feeling the muscles all the way down to his stomach, he feels so damn nice.

"Fuck, Axel," He moans before pulling his fingers out and sort of awkwardly reaching for my dick, when he grabs it though I feel my eyes rolling into the back of my head because it feels so damn good. "Pass me more lotion," he breathes and I open my eyes long enough to see where it is before passing it to him.

The cold cream makes me hiss when it comes in contact with my overheated skin, but his hand is gliding so easily along my shaft I really don't care anymore. Then Roxas spreads his legs a little, his knees braced on either side of me and all I can do is watch and he pushes himself down onto me. His face twists up in pain for a few seconds and I feel so bad for some reason. I don't know why but I feel terrible for hurting him even the slightest bit so I try and massage his thighs, then I see his own need and quickly grab it, pumping him slowly and he arches his back, moaning my name like it would save his life. The movement of him arching his back makes me groan, his tight heat wrapped all around me makes me sort of delirious with pleasure. Roxas sort of drops down so that our faces are close together and he's panting so hard you'd think he just ran a marathon.

Then he starts moving, slowly he lifts himself up and pushes back down. I wrap my arms around him, needing to feel more of him and he seems to want the same thing because he wraps his arms around my neck, lifting my head off the pillows a bit. He starts kissing my face then, and each kiss is punctuated with a soft moan. I can't take the teasing kisses anymore and capture his lips, my tongue diving into his warm mouth and battling with his own slick muscle. Everything feels so good and I'm sort of floating on a cloud, my mind all hazy around the edges as I watch him through half lidded eyes.

He pulls away from me long enough to let out a loud moan, tossing his head back and leaving his neck out in the open. I latch my teeth onto it, sucking on the warm flesh and savoring the salted taste of his skin. He trembles, panting out something that sounds like my name over and over. I lift my hips, figuring he can't do all the work and when I do, he gasps.

"F-fuck, don't stop," he breathes and that is all the encouragement I need. We set a quick pace, our hips moving together to create this delicious feeling that I'll never forget. Then the tightness in my stomach begins, the scorching heat washes over me and I know I'm close. By the way Roxas is trembling, his pants and moans coming closer together I know he's probably just on the edge too.

"Roxas, I'm so close," I whisper and he moans into my ear, hiding his face in the crook of my neck while he nods.

His muscles tighten around me, creating this blindingly pleasurable feeling and I'm not sure what happens but all I know is I'm arching off the bed, holding his hips and pressing them down against mine with enough force to bruise him, but he doesn't seem to mind at all. He cums with a moan of my name, which is muffled because his face is still pressed against my neck and I follow him soon after, our bodies tensing together and Roxas collapses onto me. I'm glad he isn't heavy or anything, or else this would be really uncomfortable.

"I love you," I say against his ear, panting and he pulls away from my neck looking at me with wide eyes.

"You do?" he asks and I smile at him like he's retarded.

"Yeah, where have you been?" I ask and he just smiles that dazzling smile again, like his entire life has been completed. He shifts hissing as he pulls me out of him and collapses beside me. I watch him as he gets comfortable against my side and when he's done, he starts laughing. I scrunch my eyebrows together more than a little confused.

"Now we're even," he says and I stare at him, not understanding anything he's saying.

"What?" I ask and he just keeps laughing, before he grips my face and kisses me.

"I took your ass virginity and you took mine," he says with a smirk and I feel like my eyes are going to fall right out of their sockets and onto his face. That would be very cool if it wasn't for this moment, and if it wasn't my eyeballs falling onto Roxas' face. I mean it would be cool if it was two complete strangers on the television or something.

"Ow!" I shout when Roxas smacks me on the side of the head. "What was that for?" I ask, rubbing the sore spot, but Roxas shoos my hand away and rubs it himself with a little smirk.

"For zoning out on me right after sex. That is terribly rude you know," he says like he knows everything and I roll my eyes.

"Shut up and go get me a sandwich," I say and Roxas hits me again, glaring like a mad man and I just have to laugh really loud before wrapping my arms around him and squeezing him against me.

"We have to teach your virgin ass some sex etiquette,"

"Later, after you make me a sandwich," I say nuzzling into his soft skin and he pushes me away, sitting up and stretching his back.

"Fine you big baby, but don't get mad when you find rat poison in it," and he goes to get up, only to fall right back down gripping his lower back and swearing like a sailor who stubbed his toe and hit his head. I laugh loudly at him before getting up and grimacing at the mess on my stomach.

"You stay here you _big baby_, I'll go get some warm towels and my sandwich," I start walking towards the door and he laughs, I can hear him getting comfortable on the bed and I roll my eyes.

"Oh and Martinez, fetch me a sandwich too!" and I feel like hitting him, and if I didn't love him like I do I probably would.

"Go fuck yourself Anderson," I hiss and he just laughs loudly as I open the door.

"You already beat me to it!"

God damn, I have obnoxious taste in men but really, I don't mind so much.

**~*~**

"I can't believe I'm at the finals!" Demyx says happily, apparently our school's football team made it to the championship and now we're having this Super Bowl sort of thing on our field. The students from the other school are sitting on the other side, in the visitor's bleachers and for some reason something possessed me to come here and bring my entire group. Don't ask me why I did it, and don't ask me why I'm willingly watching a football game.

"Oh, oh is that Roxas, Number 13?" Demyx says excitedly, pointing down to a small quarterback wearing our school's uniform. I smile down at him when he turns and waves at the entire school, he does a few obscene gestures with his hips that make everyone holler and cheer.

"I believe it is. The quarterbacks numbers range from 1 to 19 so it's very probable," Zexion answers for me and I'm glad to see their hands linked together, it does an old soul good.

It's amazing how a sport can bring everyone together. I mean, the entire school is sitting on these bleachers and no one seems to give a fuck who they are sitting beside. We're all just talking and showing our school spirit.

Naminé is sitting quietly watching as Larxene leads the cheer squad. Are you surprised? I know I was too when Naminé told me, I mean I had never even seen her with the cheerleaders, although I only really went to one game.

"After this game, there's only like 2 months till finals, are you guys ready?" Demyx asks just as the game starts, the ball flying through the air already and all you can see are team members being tackled to the floor. I watch them for a while listening to Zexion tell him what university he got accepted to, Demyx kisses his cheek congratulating him, Naminé tells us about the Art school she got into and everyone congratulates her then it's my turn.

"Bah, I was born ready," I say with a smirk and they just laugh, Demyx throwing his free arm around my shoulders.

"Next year, college man…" he trails off and I know exactly what he means seeing as we both got accepted into the same school. I wrap my arm around him and laugh loudly, cheering with the crowd as Roxas does a dance in the end zone, grabbing the football and acting like he's dancing with it while the team bows at his greatness.

"Yeah, life is just beginning isn't it?"

* * *

**A/N:** And that's all folks!  
I'd really like to thank everyone who stuck around me and Nosemilk till the very end. I mean, you guys gave me inspiration when I had none and you all simply made me a very happy panda, not that I'm a panda or anything -cough-

__

I'm going to miss Martinez and Anderson. I had so much fun writing them and especially writing Axel's perspective. I should try it again sometime, what do y'all think?

**My little shout outs!  
**Psychedelic-InkBlot, thetacoatemysoul, Sinful Zee, Sweetnemesis91, SugarBeatAngel, thedeviltheangelandtheme and so many more.  
I wish I could thank you all extensively with a nice gift basket and everything!  
But alas, I can't.

This story is dedicated to **Jennifer Campos**.  
Without her this would have never been completed.

I hope I'll see you all again!  
Till Next time!

-Your friendly neighborhood Sharmander


	17. Chapter 17

Hello everyone, and sorry that this is not an actual update. This is in fact **very serious**, so before you close this I'm begging you read it.

I was just informed by my dearest friend PinkFloydLady that there is something awful happening on called Redbottom, or something of the sort created by Lord Kelvin. I'm not too sure about all the details but what I have heard is that stories with 'mature' themes are being reported left, right and center for being in violation of the ToS. It's supposedly this program that scans stories and flags them when they have inappropriate content. The thing is, some stories don't even have anything bad, yet they are still being reported.

This post is just to say that if something does happen, and if this is real (if you know anything about this please, message me and let me in on the facts!) I will be leaving . I'm only saying this because I know a few of you follow my stories and I wouldn't want you all to be like 'whoa wtf?' and leave you all hanging. I could continue to write, but my posting will be somewhere else. Maybe on y!gallery, or deviantart. I'm not too sure.

My y!gallery name is the same (Sharmander) and my Deviantart account is Claaiiireee. I haven't posted anything there yet, but if something happens all my stories will be moved there and you guys can continue to follow them if you would like to. Just let me know if anyone's still interested in reading outside of .

Thank you all so much, and if this is really happening I am going to miss this website very much ):

Signed with a heavy heart, Sharmander.


End file.
